Overview
This thread will be frequently referenced in my later threads and replies. I might also tag previous threads of mine and others if the content relates to this.The agony levels are sets of causes and effects within the sphere of inceldom. Certain things happen in your life, and those things have consequences. Furthermore, those consequences will determine what your most immediate needs are. I will also include common pitfalls for every level.
Agony levels will have variations from individual to individual. You can do a list for yourself or post it here if you want to (within OPSEC guidelines of course).
Agony level 1 - You don't have a girlfriend
You don't have a girlfriend but everything else in your life is going more or less smoothly. You have a family that loves you, you like your job, you are healthy, you have enough money to do what you want. You have friends that like hanging out with you.Most incels are NOT in this level, because inceldom often comes as a package deal. Most of us will be in deeper more agonizing levels.
Immediate needs: Seeking relationships and intimacy without other obstacles.
Common pitfalls: Opening up about lack of relationships. You will be labelled as a frustrated asshole with a victim complex. People might think something is wrong with you and end friendships on the spot. Male competitors will take note and use this information against you.
Agony level 2 - You don't have a girlfriend and your physical features are lacking
You have noticed flaws in your physical appearance. Face, height, dick size, skin related issues like acne and so on. However, some of these problems can be fixable with resources from your family, or if you are insanely lucky and have a shared values community. You can also distract yourself with school or work until the problems are solved or mitigated.Immediate needs: Fixing or attempting to fix the lacking features (e.g. via looksmaxxing), then seeking relationships and intimacy once/if a satisfactory level is achieved.
Common pitfalls: All of the above pitfalls plus opening up about your physical flaws. You will be gaslit. Your flaws will be more prominently used against you in heated discussions. You might also fall for the red herring of hygiene/grooming - while you should absolutely take care of your hygiene, it might not be enough to get you into a relationship if you're lacking in the other stuff. Being athletic is nice but won't save you by itself.
Agony level 3 - You don't have a girlfriend, lack physical attractiveness and you come from a poor and dysfunctional family
At this level, fixing the problems present in the upper levels becomes much more difficult. With the end of shared value communities and settlements, you either have money or you're fucked. You will also be gaslit by your family.Immediate needs: Distancing from family becomes a top need, although the pains of being single and lacking in looks will still lurk in the background.
Common pitfalls: All of the above plus opening up about your dysfunctional family. Almost nobody wants to hear that. It will also indicate lack of resources and safety nets, which puts a target on your back. You might be sold questionable advice such as self-reparenting.
Agony level 4 - You don't have a girlfriend, lack physical attractiveness and you come from a poor and dysfunctional family AND you hate school/college
At this point you cannot take refuge in your studies. You might still bruteforce things and get through college but the likelyhood that you'll resort to drugs increases. And yes, things like alcohol and tobacco are drugs. Due to the boring fucking nature of most schools, you might begin to build your own internal world.Immediate needs: At this point, you might want to finish school/college as fast as possible with minimized asshole (don't be a cuck like I was). You might accidentally put off the needs from prior levels, in particular the ones from agony level 2. Becoming overweight/obese is likely, if you have that tendency in your genetics.
Common pitfalls: All of the above plus opening up about dysfunction in your school or college. Unless you have a solid legal case, you don't have leverage over this. Your SMV will mediate your legitimate concerns. Complaining about your school/college to your family will result in them defending the abuse, because the power dynamics are similar. They reinforce toxic family power dynamics by defending toxic school power dynamics. While not necessarily a pitfall, leaving negative reviews for institutions will increase the likelihood of those reviews being removed; in more extreme cases, you might be threatened by legal teams. As for internal world building, it's a defense mechanism against the abuse you are getting; it prevents teachers from running you over completely. You must remain strong in the face of unsolicited teasing.
Agony level 5 - You don't have a girlfriend, lack physical attractiveness and you come from a poor and dysfunctional family AND you hate school/college AND you hate your job
You cannot take refuge in school or work. Drugs consumption increases further. Nightmares more frequent.Immediate needs: You will either try to ride it out with drugs or switch jobs. You previous needs are still on the background. Once again, be careful about putting off the needs from Agony level #2. Unfortunately you can't do much about, schools, companies and dysfunctional family, but #2 is still the one you're more likely to maintain. You will also notice a subtle but disturbing need for human intimacy, the problem is that you are now very far removed from Agony level #1.
Common pitfalls: All of the above plus opening up about dysfunction in company or workgroup. Unless you have a solid legal case, you don't have leverage over this. Your SMV will mediante your legitimate concerns. Your family will once again defend the abuse. Higher risk of legal troubles when leaving negative reviews. You will also notice that the money secured by your job is being used to fuel your drug consumption and escapism, which were exacerbated in part due to the nature of the job itself. This means you are in practice earning LESS money than you think. Consider leaving jobs that don't respect you. Or quiet quitting.
Agony level 6 - You don't have a girlfriend, lack physical attractiveness and you come from a poor and dysfunctional family AND you hate school/college AND you hate your MULTIPLE jobs
More of the same shit as level 5. You might have to hold down two jobs either for money or for legal obligations. Information overload is common here, in addition to the previous challenges.Immediate needs: Same as level 5, but the craving for intimacy becomes more intense, because it's the contrast your body wants against the onslaught of abuse you're receiving. Escortmaxxing is usually considered for folks in this situation.
Common pitfalls: Unfortunately Escortmaxxing can be a pitfall in of itself if you don't know what you're doing. At this point people around you can get a better sense of your current agony level, because it's more difficult to conceal. You might become a scapegoat or cannon fodder as a result.
Other than that, same pitfalls as before.
Agony level 7 - You don't have a girlfriend, lack physical attractiveness and you come from a poor and dysfunctional family AND you hate school/college AND you hate your MULTIPLE jobs AND you are ill
Guess who's currently in THIS level? It's yo boi
Health problems will ravage you in this level. The only good thing MIGHT be if you get medical leave. This will lessen pains of agony levels #4 though #7 even if temporarily.
Immediate needs: Maddening need for intimacy and sex, despite the distance from Agony level #1. Your own body will torture you until you can get it.
Common pitfalls: Telling people about your specific health problems, unless they absolutely need to know (e.g. health professionals and often unfortunately your superiors at work). Most people will not care and they will be glad you're ill.
Additional agony levels
I am aware that some users on .is are homeless or terminally ill. I will not attempt to explain what those scenarios are like, as I have not faced them yet, and it would be disrespectful for those users, and overall dishonest. Feel free to continue posting from level 8 if you have those experiences & would like to share them.Possible solutions
You'll notice that this is not a blackpill thread. This is because I provide some solutions or leverage points. Now let's go in reverse (hope you like puzzles):- Level 7 - Make your health your maximum priority, even if people around you disregard it. If you have leverage to ask medical leave to your doctor, DO IT. Your job will not miss you if you die, even if you died working.
- Level 6 - If you were given some bullshit management tasks for the building you live in, you can present your medical leave (if you still have it from level 7), and argue you don't have conditions to proceed further. If you are working two jobs due to money, this is more complicated. You're better off with another new single job that pays enough, if possible.
- Level 5 - Consider leaving jobs that don't respect you. Or quiet quitting. You're probably taking less money home than you think.
- Level 4 - Don't grademaxx unless you have a specific reason to do it. Almost no one cares about grades after school/college.
- Level 3 - Consider moving out.
- Levels 2 and 1 - This is where things get really difficult. Due to genetics, there are things about ourselves we can't change, or we can't change them with the limited money we have.
