Venting I haven’t genuinely smiled or laughed in over a month

[Native]

I talk to women all the time. I have nothing but fake friends and people who would leave me to die but possibly use me exclusively for company on the rare instance they were bored but that never ever happens. If I never message anyone nobody ever messages me. I could die after I type this message and not a single fucking person would know, and when someone would find out, nobody would care. I haven’t done anything to deserve this, I’ve always been nice to people, I workout a lot, I have a job but my coworkers are fake people as well.

Often the loneliness just takes over and I just function like a robot, doing things I know I have to do every morning, day, and night, just to make sure I don’t run into any issues. I manage everything in my life financially, as well as time management, food, planning for the future, housing, my car, all of it by myself I am only 20 years old with no family, friends, or anything.

I haven’t had a good laugh or felt happy in a long, long time. I wish things would change but I’m so paranoid that if things ever did change, would it only be temporary? This life is all I’ve ever known and I’m afraid, very afraid, that it will never change. Nobody is coming to save me, and I’m doing everything I can to save myself. It’s as if there is literally no solution to all this.

 

[Mentally lost cel]

talk to women all the time. I have nothing but fake friends and people who would leave me to die but possibly use me exclusively for company on the rare instance they were bored but that never ever happens. If I never message anyone nobody ever messages me.

Sounds fakecel bro

 

[Native]

What’s funny is I’m not even complaining that I don’t have women. I don’t have anyone, anyone at all. My own mother and father don’t care about me. I haven’t talked to my dad in a few years, since I was 15, and my mother I haven’t talked to since I moved out because she treated me so horribly. Now I’m just alone, and it feels so, so terrible. Often I just feel like I have knives in my heart or something, all I want to do is sleep because it keeps me from living in this reality.

Sounds fakecel bro

You wouldn’t think I was an incel if you saw me. But if you followed me around for a full day then you’d get it.

 

[Azaylias]

What’s funny is I’m not even complaining that I don’t have women. I don’t have anyone, anyone at all. My own mother and father don’t care about me. I haven’t talked to my dad in a few years, since I was 15, and my mother I haven’t talked to since I moved out because she treated me so horribly. Now I’m just alone, and it feels so, so terrible. Often I just feel like I have knives in my heart or something, all I want to do is sleep because it keeps me from living in this reality.

That's brutal. I can relate to your perpetual sleep. I often times don't wake up until 3pm unless I have to be somewhere

 

[OwlGod]

i laugh easily and way more than i should to the point of looking like a maniac while doing it
it's fast unfiltered erratic grasp of things amalgamated with the absurdity and synchronicity nature of everything, the curse of despair

 

[<human]

You wouldn’t think I was an incel if you saw me. But if you followed me around for a full day then you’d get it.

irl the truly grotesque looking people are somewhat pitied and their situation is obvious
however if you're not horribly hideous but not good looking enough to really "make it" you turn into a drone
this basically sums up a lot of robots and even non virgins can end up in this shitty life of mundane loneliness
a consequence of an atomized postmodernist society

 

[Native]

irl the truly grotesque looking people are somewhat pitied and their situation is obvious
however if you're not horribly hideous but not good looking enough to really "make it" you turn into a drone
this basically sums up a lot of robots and even non virgins can end up in this shitty life of mundane loneliness
a consequence of an atomized postmodernist society

I think that perfectly describes where im at I guess. Not good enough looking to really experience any of the best parts of life, not subhuman enough to be pitied, I guess it’s still better than being subhuman but im still absolutely in agony here. I just want this mental pain to end, it won’t go away no matter what I try the lonely feelings come back.

 

[Arabcel9]

unironically embrace solitude

i laugh easily and way more than i should to the point of looking like a maniac while doing it
it's fast unfiltered erratic grasp of things amalgamated with the absurdity and synchronicity nature of everything, the curse of despair

same

 

[Dr. Incel]

I remember how i laughed when i first arrived and started lurking here. Then it all slowly crept in on me.