https://www.fbherald.com/a-debilitating-duo/article_c2468434-b657-5ed7-876e-597b82a9034e.html
If you know me, you know I’m always on the prowl.
OK, that sounds worse than it is.
But I’m always swiping on the dating apps, always keeping my options open.
And I’ve kept them, like, way open.
And for what? Nothing, it seems.
I’ve gone out with tall guys, short guys, skinny guys, fat guys, balding guys and even that type of guy who still tries to pull off the man-bun.
And I’ve come to one conclusion: no matter how cute or funny or handsome or rude or boring they are, men are useless.
Maybe I’m being dramatic.
But then again, maybe I’m not.
Hear me out.
A few weeks ago, I was chatting with my friend about dating.
We talked about getting off the apps and meeting people in real life, you know, like they did in the olden days.
So, over the last few weekends, I’ve gone out. And been available.
And... nothing.
Nada.
Zip.
Zilch.
Zero.
I know what you’re thinking, “Averil, why don’t YOU go talk to a guy or buy HIM a drink? It’s 2019, women are equal, blah blah blah.”
So, I tried it. I put myself out there. If guys could do it, why couldn’t I?
Good idea in theory.
Social suicide in reality.
Guys spent the whole night clustered in groups, gawking at women from afar.
And if girls did approach them, the guys were suddenly entranced by what was on their phone or whatever game was playing on the bar TV.
Hit and a miss. Well, I thought, that’s all right.
Until I got a message on one of my dating apps later that night.
“Hey!” the message read. “Did I see you out tonight?”
I was confused at first.
If this guy had seen me out, why didn’t he say something?
Why did he wait until I was gone to message me?
I asked my friend about it and she said a similar occurrence happened to her.
“Yeah, I was at the bar and the guy I had been dating texted me,” she explained.
“‘Hey, I see you,’ the text read.”
She said she was shocked. Not because she was worried he was stalking her, but because he saw her and decided not to say hi. He decided to text her hi.
“‘Um, OK, then come say hi!’ is what I, and anyone else, would have responded,” she continued.
“Like, hello, if you see me, come say hi. Don’t talk about it, BE about it.”
These guys are quite literally hiding behind the screen of a phone to make their moves.
I have another friend who told me a guy invited her to a party, managed to make awkward eye contact with her but didn’t talk to her the whole night.
When she left the party, he texted her, “You looked hot tonight.”
I never thought I would say this, but... technology is ruining our lives.
Or, our dating lives, anyway.
Guys don’t want to meet girls in real life any more.
They want to swipe on the apps and have girls come to them.
Because it’s easier to be rejected over the phone than in person.
And isn’t that what social media is all about?
Making your life easier?
Well, it’s making mine harder.
And I don’t know what to do about it.
Guys are taking the easy way out.
Text, tweet, direct message, comment, like.
That’s how people flirt now.
So, what’s a girl like me to do?
I can’t overturn technology.
I can’t go back in time and change the error of our dating ways.
All I can do is continue doing me.
Put myself out there.
Online and out in public.
And just hope The One is out there, shuffling around awkwardly, feeling just as annoyed about dating as I am.
If you know me, you know I’m always on the prowl.
OK, that sounds worse than it is.
But I’m always swiping on the dating apps, always keeping my options open.
And I’ve kept them, like, way open.
And for what? Nothing, it seems.
I’ve gone out with tall guys, short guys, skinny guys, fat guys, balding guys and even that type of guy who still tries to pull off the man-bun.
And I’ve come to one conclusion: no matter how cute or funny or handsome or rude or boring they are, men are useless.
Maybe I’m being dramatic.
But then again, maybe I’m not.
Hear me out.
A few weeks ago, I was chatting with my friend about dating.
We talked about getting off the apps and meeting people in real life, you know, like they did in the olden days.
So, over the last few weekends, I’ve gone out. And been available.
And... nothing.
Nada.
Zip.
Zilch.
Zero.
I know what you’re thinking, “Averil, why don’t YOU go talk to a guy or buy HIM a drink? It’s 2019, women are equal, blah blah blah.”
So, I tried it. I put myself out there. If guys could do it, why couldn’t I?
Good idea in theory.
Social suicide in reality.
Guys spent the whole night clustered in groups, gawking at women from afar.
And if girls did approach them, the guys were suddenly entranced by what was on their phone or whatever game was playing on the bar TV.
Hit and a miss. Well, I thought, that’s all right.
Until I got a message on one of my dating apps later that night.
“Hey!” the message read. “Did I see you out tonight?”
I was confused at first.
If this guy had seen me out, why didn’t he say something?
Why did he wait until I was gone to message me?
I asked my friend about it and she said a similar occurrence happened to her.
“Yeah, I was at the bar and the guy I had been dating texted me,” she explained.
“‘Hey, I see you,’ the text read.”
She said she was shocked. Not because she was worried he was stalking her, but because he saw her and decided not to say hi. He decided to text her hi.
“‘Um, OK, then come say hi!’ is what I, and anyone else, would have responded,” she continued.
“Like, hello, if you see me, come say hi. Don’t talk about it, BE about it.”
These guys are quite literally hiding behind the screen of a phone to make their moves.
I have another friend who told me a guy invited her to a party, managed to make awkward eye contact with her but didn’t talk to her the whole night.
When she left the party, he texted her, “You looked hot tonight.”
I never thought I would say this, but... technology is ruining our lives.
Or, our dating lives, anyway.
Guys don’t want to meet girls in real life any more.
They want to swipe on the apps and have girls come to them.
Because it’s easier to be rejected over the phone than in person.
And isn’t that what social media is all about?
Making your life easier?
Well, it’s making mine harder.
And I don’t know what to do about it.
Guys are taking the easy way out.
Text, tweet, direct message, comment, like.
That’s how people flirt now.
So, what’s a girl like me to do?
I can’t overturn technology.
I can’t go back in time and change the error of our dating ways.
All I can do is continue doing me.
Put myself out there.
Online and out in public.
And just hope The One is out there, shuffling around awkwardly, feeling just as annoyed about dating as I am.
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