LDAR Things are dire also I can't write for shit.

[Gyros_Pretcel]

Long time no see. I wrote a lengthier text on the chat without planning to, you could say. I guess I just need to vent. Changed back to my old avi for this ocasion, maybe someone remembers my story. Context. I got essentially let's call it into a new(!) preventable medical accident due to doctors and my parents not listening which might have further crippled me for life. I live now in a facility for disabled people. I hate it, I hate my whole existence. Maybe I will use this as a stepping stone to give a longer more detailed update in the future. It's all very rambly and badly written.

I don't really feel understood even on the forum or chat. I always feel you just think, I am exaggerating, just unwilling or retarded idk. I saw pretty much a black swan event unfolding over the last 8 years without the ability to act or get help from anyone. The people in this facility now at least pretend to care, but what can I tell them? Any demand would sound ridiculous in their ears, even if they support me and not just pretend. In the end everything boils down to money anyway and I am done seeing these people dancing around me, while I am essentially dying of poverty, lack of healthcare and ostracization. I just want to chop everything and everyone into peaces and then die (in video game). I am just dragging out the situation again. Not speaking my mind openly. I could now ask the usual, why am such an anxious cuck, but well it's not that I avoid things this time, I genuinely think there is just not a point anymore and idk what to say or do. I just want it to end.
[UWSL]Very meta again. But there are so many details to this situation. Inb4[/UWSL][UWSL] noone answering here, I'll post on the forum get some stupid taunts and that's it. Idk I probably actually am kinda retarded. It's hard for me to learn anything intellectual. I just try remembering on the fly by very quickly reading everything once and the rest is improv. Can't bring myself to read a second time. Maybe my understanding of things and writing style is a bit lacking therefore. I can't write long texts for shit. honestly my weiting skill probably never surpassed 5th grade. It's always some vague metaish train of thought with a lot of redundancy. Idk I did well at least in my history finals with 13/15 points, but well, always got bad grades in german in lit interpretation due to not enough bullshitting.[/UWSL][UWSL]Kind of unrelated, but somehow also not. I simply weite very unengaging with unconjoined points on a very shallow level. [/UWSL][UWSL]I also feel like I lack the inner complexity to engage with people (normies irl) idk. Most things are pretty clear to me. Not much a point to talk about it or to engage over with people. I just "am" most of the time. But, I guess I am wrong here, because often I read something new and insightful, I just can't produce anything myself.[/UWSL]

[UWSL]Also it's not my IQ, I guess it is just ameme in the end or adhd idk.[/UWSL]

[UWSL]Hate myself for going back to posting on the forum, but I guess, I feel like needing the attention(?), which I certainly won't get in the desired fashion anyway, but I need to follow the urge and if it is just to stay away from posting again. [/UWSL]

 

[Billowel]

i am confused.Which illness do you have? how bad was the fuck up for you to be in a place for disabled people?

 

[nice_try]

i am confused.Which illness do you have? how bad was the fuck up for you to be in a place for disabled people?

He wrote such a long essay but didn't tell us anything about his actual situation.

 

[TheGambler2]

I can relate to you on the writing part, I cannot write long texts either

whenever I try I just have too much trouble putting coherent sentences together and combining them to make a logical and fluid text

every time it came out as some retarded diarrhea this is why I moved on to the current writing style, this way I just make the main points in each line without having to think much about some combinations probably a mentalcel trait

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

i am confused.Which illness do you have? how bad was the fuck up for you to be in a place for disabled people?

I have aspergers, avpd, depression and ENS (empty nose syndrome/ post operative atrophic rhinitis sicca). I am mostly here, because my parents threw me out. Not that they were allowed to technically, but when everyone is against you, what can you do. I am not here for the new fuck up, which was my mucosa atrophying further, thanks to locking me up in the mental hospital again wihout proper nasal care. I will probably stay here now though because of that. I can't feel the airflow anymore therefore feel like suffocating and it's constantly inflammated. I feel like my soul was lobotomized. There is much more to it, but honestly it's so complicated.

 

[InMemoriam]

He wrote such a long essay but didn't tell us anything about his actual situation.

High IQcel trait right there, say everything while saying nothing at the same time

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

High IQcel trait right there, say everything while saying nothing at the same time

This is what I mean.
But to be fair this was only a ramble and never meant to be posted on the forum.

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

Retarded diarrhea

Yup lol.

 

[InMemoriam]

This is what I mean.
But to be fair this was only a ramble and never meant to be posted on the forum.

It will surprise you but we all get this one way or the other, the stats has already confirmed that most of us have mental disorders

 

[Billowel]

I have aspergers, avpd, depression and ENS (empty nose syndrome/ post operative atrophic rhinitis sicca). I am mostly here, because my parents threw me out. Not that they were allowed to technically, but when everyone is against you, what can you do. I am not here for the new fuck up, which was my mucosa atrophying further, thanks to locking me up in the mental hospital again wihout proper nasal care. I will probably stay here now though because of that. I can't feel the airflow anymore therefore feel like suffocating and it's constantly inflammated. I feel like my soul was lobotomized. There is much more to it, but honestly it's so complicated.

so they left you there because it was better for you?seems like a lot has happened to you,so it's kinda hard to figure out what is exactly happening.

i hope you get yourself treated though brocel.you can buy lourdes water from etsy(or call nuns who deal with healthcare as they might have it), and buy a miraculous medal.those two have done many miracles.i suppose you can also buy a green scapular but it needs to be blessed.I suppose holy water might help. also saints relics and graves have done many miracles so it might help.the 54 day rosary novena also does miracles

apart from that brocel i don't know what could help.

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

so they left you there because it was better for you?seems like a lot has happened to you,so it's kinda hard to figure out what is exactly happening.

Nahh, I told them after my surgery 9 years ago to save some money for my treatment and help me with some bureaucracy, they never did, I partly assumed due to money. I kind of lost it, when they started to remodel our house and called them out on it. They are just crybullies honestly. I started to stand up for myself that year. Even discussed with my tradcuck boomer dad, as my mom told me to, who refuses to talk to me, but she is kinda vindictive, yelled at me from the other room, that it is all my fault, because I block off refuse to engage with the situation (and move out, which is all they ever want). Just boomers telling you the usual pull yourself up by your bootstrals crap. (Btw moving out just made my situation just financially worse so far, surprise(not).) I lost it stormed into her room and asked her repeatedly how I am blocking off and refused to leave. She then screams, I leave, she calls the police. Mind you I opened up to them both that year, I explained them, what I need, how I can't go to the psychiatric hospital because of my nose and corona, how my conservator just abuses me for money, the economy, inceldom. Not even the first time about the nose. They don't care or are retarded idk.

I honesy think they are prolly just stingy, when it comes to other people, but themselves. I also never got pocket money and had to fight to get new clothes after 14. Idk my parents used to be kind of rich. But they always spent it on crap. It's just weird and untransparent.

 

[Billowel]

Nahh, I told them after my surgery 9 years ago to save some money for my treatment and help me with some bureaucracy, they never did, I partly assumed due to money. I kind of lost it, when they started to remodel our house and called them out on it. They are just crybullies honestly. I started to stand up for myself that year. Even discussed with my tradcuck boomer dad, as my mom told me to, who refuses to talk to me, but she is kinda vindictive, yelled at me from the other room, that it is all my fault, because I block off refuse to engage with the situation (and move out, which is all they ever want). Just boomers telling you the usual pull yourself up by your bootstrals crap. (Btw moving out just made my situation just financially worse so far, surprise(not).) I lost it stormed into her room and asked her repeatedly how I am blocking off and refused to leave. She then screams, I leave, she calls the police. Mind you I opened up to them both that year, I explained them, what I need, how I can't go to the psychiatric hospital because of my nose and corona, how my conservator just abuses me for money, the economy, inceldom. Not even the first time about the nose. They don't care or are retarded idk.

I honesy think they are prolly just stingy, when it comes to other people, but themselves. I also never got pocket money and had to fight to get new clothes after 14. Idk my parents used to be kind of rich. But they always spent it on crap. It's just weird and untransparent.

parents are often narcissitic like that.they want sons and daughters to be like cute dogs and cats instead of being complex creatures created in gods image made to be with christ one day.

so you got kicked out then.some countries offer decent support for the homeless.i know that some catholic groups(mostly handled by priests/friars and monks) offer shelter for the homeless.

since you already have shelter,and you need medical care,that's not really something you think about but yeah.does this disease you have impede you from work?i imagine heavy breathing issues must be hell for it,but i have to ask.

what are the treatments for the nose issues?any dates for when it might be fixed?

I am sorry brocel,for not being much help.i will pray for you.

 

[sol]

i am confused.Which illness do you have? how bad was the fuck up for you to be in a place for disabled people?

was it internal or external damage to cause you to be put where you are

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

was it internal or external damage to cause you to be put where you are

Wdym? Turbines atrophied in the hospital thanks to ignoring my concerns.

parents are often narcissitic like that.they want sons and daughters to be like cute dogs and cats instead of being complex creatures created in gods image made to be with christ one day.

so you got kicked out then.some countries offer decent support for the homeless.i know that some catholic groups(mostly handled by priests/friars and monks) offer shelter for the homeless.

since you already have shelter,and you need medical care,that's not really something you think about but yeah.does this disease you have impede you from work?i imagine heavy breathing issues must be hell for it,but i have to ask.

what are the treatments for the nose issues?any dates for when it might be fixed?

I am sorry brocel,for not being much help.i will pray for you.

I spent half a year in hospital jfl. (Big mistake)

Not really able to work. Wasn't really able to before. I also have tons of other physical stuff. Ey[UWSL]e, skin and back problems. [/UWSL]

[UWSL]You are mostly treated like a thief here with mental problems. I suppose, that is also the reason my parents are like how they are. We mostly have tradcuck conservative government here.[/UWSL]
[UWSL][/UWSL]

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

There is basically no official treatment. It is all highly experimental stemcell treatment costing minimum 30k €.