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Venting My extreme social anxiety has caused me to alienate the only friends that ever cared about me

Rot&Repeat

Rot&Repeat

Always Tired
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Apr 14, 2021
Posts
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To start off, they were just like me. Ethnic, below average, no gf, into shit like anime, cartoons, rock music and video games. Everything was actually great with them. We would spend all day together in high school, play cards in the library, crack jokes and maybe play basketball after school.

It all went south when we graduated high school and it meant that to see them more often i had to take like a half hour bus ride to their neighborhood(they both lived close). I think i got tired of constantly leaving the house to go to them so at some point i decided i wouldnt respond to their texts when they ask if i wanted to hang. They ofcourse kept texting but i just wouldnt respond cause my social battery just felt so drained all the time that i didnt feel like talking to another person at all. Then at some point the texts stopped. They had forgotten me and i regret it to this day. I literally gave up my best cope in the form of hanging out with them and it haunts me endlessly. I still have dreams with them in it with us all hanging out again at the park or library. It would be too awkward to message them again after its been like nearly 2 years since ive ghosted.

Im a complete fucking idiot. I miss everything with them. I missed us ordering dominos together and eating it at their home while we watched an old horror movie. I missed us playing basketball at the park. I missed us going to see the latest horror/anime movie. I missed us going to the beach and crashing with the waves. I missed us playing uno and DnD in the public library.

I also blame my overprotective mom who kept calling me at fucking 5 pm telling me to return home and kept pestering me to the point where i thought if i never went again i wont have to deal with her calls

I SHOT MYSELF IN THE FUCKING FOOT AND I DESERVE IT. IM A COMPLETE FUCKING IDIOT AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO HAVE THEM BACK:feelsrope::feelsrope::feelsrope::feelsrope::feelsrope:
 
Learning the hard way sucks :feelscry:
 
Lie. create a lie or fabricate a reason to why you haven't contacted them and ghosted them for 2 years. that's if they disserve it and you want them back so much.
however, if you want my opinion, non blackpilled friends are not that much of a loss. these guys you liked so much will make a joke out of you if you share your confusion with them so don't think too much about it.
 
Lie. create a lie or fabricate a reason to why you haven't contacted them and ghosted them for 2 years. that's if they disserve it and you want them back so much.
however, if you want my opinion, non blackpilled friends are not that much of a loss. these guys you liked so much will make a joke out of you if you share your confusion with them so don't think too much about it.
Yeah im too ashamed to even respond so might as well save any dignity i have left
 
Yeah im too ashamed to even respond so might as well save any dignity i have left
saving dignity? I don't understand. if they were real true friends they would understand your situation even if you told them the truth. apparently there are some barriers you kept and I got that from your social anxiety.
 
No they don’t :feelsseriously:. People say girls come and go too yet we are rotting here. After college you need friends to make friends.
no comparison whatsoever. foids don't "come" like male friends and will never come to us
 
you can just contact them again 2 years isn't that long tbh, literally my ''friends'' came to contact me again after literally 5 years later and i regret giving them a second chance in my case.
 
To start off, they were just like me. Ethnic, below average, no gf, into shit like anime, cartoons, rock music and video games. Everything was actually great with them. We would spend all day together in high school, play cards in the library, crack jokes and maybe play basketball after school.

It all went south when we graduated high school and it meant that to see them more often i had to take like a half hour bus ride to their neighborhood(they both lived close). I think i got tired of constantly leaving the house to go to them so at some point i decided i wouldnt respond to their texts when they ask if i wanted to hang. They ofcourse kept texting but i just wouldnt respond cause my social battery just felt so drained all the time that i didnt feel like talking to another person at all. Then at some point the texts stopped. They had forgotten me and i regret it to this day. I literally gave up my best cope in the form of hanging out with them and it haunts me endlessly. I still have dreams with them in it with us all hanging out again at the park or library. It would be too awkward to message them again after its been like nearly 2 years since ive ghosted.

Im a complete fucking idiot. I miss everything with them. I missed us ordering dominos together and eating it at their home while we watched an old horror movie. I missed us playing basketball at the park. I missed us going to see the latest horror/anime movie. I missed us going to the beach and crashing with the waves. I missed us playing uno and DnD in the public library.

I also blame my overprotective mom who kept calling me at fucking 5 pm telling me to return home and kept pestering me to the point where i thought if i never went again i wont have to deal with her calls

I SHOT MYSELF IN THE FUCKING FOOT AND I DESERVE IT. IM A COMPLETE FUCKING IDIOT AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO HAVE THEM BACK:feelsrope::feelsrope::feelsrope::feelsrope::feelsrope:
If you would do anything why not at least try to contact them and explain your situation?
You said you would do anything.
 
Don’t let it end. Just contact them you sperg, that’s way too valuable to just let sit even if it has been two years.

Just copy and paste this like of text: “hey man it’s been a long time since I’ve heard from you. How’ve you been?”

And presto, you’re set. You’ll be able to delete this whole post afterwards.
 

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