I don't want to give up. I'm fighting against the odds, I know, but I'd like to get surgery and other non-invasive procedures in order to ascend afterwards.
BUT MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING ROBBING MY CHANCES TO EVER EXPERIENCE HUGS, CARE, AFFECTION, LOVE AND THOSE CUNTS DON'T EVEN RECOGNISE IT.
I had tough arguments (in the sense that i was insulted, seen as insane and out of touch with reality) by my parents, especially my mom.
I tried to be calm, explain that I wanted to work, even though I'm "just" 18, in order to get the remaining money I need for my surgery, they refused, thinking I was crazy for saying that it will improve my chances at getting a partner, and that I shouldn't waste it on those procedures.
I had another arguments where I tried to blackpill them by talking about the halo effect, how my father's colleagues (my father is 5ft6, good thing I'm 2 inches taller than him) were probably making more money than him for the same job just because they are taller, how we are animals and select genes to ensure that the genetic offspring is good and that looks do matter, but those IDIOTS KEPT TRYING TO PROVE ME WRONG WITH INCORECTS ARGUMENTS, MY DAD SAYING HE WAS MAKING MORE THAT A TALLER COLLEGUE THAT WAS WORKING IN A LOWER ECHELON, LOWER PAID JOB FOR THE COMPANY. HOW FUCKING STUPID IS HE ??!
MY SISTER GOT BULLIED BY OTHER GIRL AT SCHOOL BECAUSE HER NOSE IS TOO BIG AND UNDEFINED, I TOLD MY MOM, AND SHE RESPONDED "JUST DON'T LISTEN TO THEM" !! YEAH, YEAH, JUST IGNORE CONTINIOUS SETS OF WORDS THAT CAN CRUSH SOMEONE'S SELF ESTEEM AND DO PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE, IT'S THAT EASY !!! NO FUCKING EMPATHY FOR HER DAUGHER (MY SISTER) WHO'S ALREADY MENTALY DISABLED (speaking, focusing, socializing, and brain development problems, thankfully she has a good close circle of friends).
The other day I decided to act on my own, as I wanted to improve on my teeth, I found a guide on looksmax.org written by pneumo about teeth whitening via bleaching, I bought the materials off of Amazon in fear that my parents would find out because they have access to my bank account. I was so afraid of being in another argument I started crying, because I know how it'll be once they'll find out.
In 30 minutes they found out, and same as last time, but even worse. I tried to justify myself about my desire to improve my teeth's color, they made me cancel the things I had ordered. I kind of crashed out, and in doing so, I showed the studies I had saved about women's preferences on dating apps (the famous Cupid data), I showed them papers on the importance of the face, how the perceived personality of oneself was more positively rated the greater he was rated physically by women.
I was crying because again, I had put all my hopes in this, yet, my parents were the obstacle.
OF COURSE THEY FRICKING STILL ARE !!!!!
AND AGAIN, THEIR STUPIDITY SHOWED ; MY MOTHER TELLING ME NUMBERS AND SCIENCE CAN'T EXPLAIN LOVE WHEN I WAS TELLING THEM THAT "LOVE" (conditional of course) ALWAYS STARTS WITH PHYSICAL ATTRACTION !!! MY MOTHER TELLING ME TO IGNORE THESE GIRLS : "THAT IS JUST A THING THEY SAID AT A GIVEN MOMENT" WHEN I ARRIEVED DURING THE FIRST WEEK OF THE TOURISM MANADGMENT COURSE AND ALL I HEAR FROM THE GIRLS IN MY CLASS WAS THEM CHATTING ABOUT LOOKS OF THEIR EX, OF CELEBRITIES OR DUDES THEY WOULD FIND ONLINE.
THEY TOLD ME OTHER COULD TELL I WAS INSECURE, SCARED OF PEOPLE (I WASN'T BEFORE BEING REJECTED BY AN EIGTH DIFFERENT GIRL, SO THEIR ARGUMENT MAKES NO SENSE AND THEY KNOW IT (THEY KNOW ABOUT ME BEING REJECTED)) BECAUSE OF INSTINCS BECAUSE WE ARE ANIMALS AND CAN SENSE IT, "WELL HOW ABOUT LOOKS MAKING UP THE VAST MAJORITY OF WHAT INSTINCTS ARE SEARCHING FOR WHEN LOOKING FOR A PARTNER ?!" BUT OF COURSE, OF COURSE ! I WASN'T HEARD, IT WAS DISMISSED AS SOME NONSENSE.
THEY KEPT TELLING TO GO OUTSIDE, TO OBSERVE THE REAL WORLD, TO SEE PEOPLE AND FIX MY PERSONALITY (WHICH IS PARTIALLY GENETICALLY HEREDITED BTW), AND WHEN I WAS CALLING OUT THEIR GENERALISATION OF EXCEPTIONS (e.g. short men being with someone), THEY JUST BRUSHED IT OFF !!!
(other things were told but it's not as important so I won't write it here)
HOW CAN YOU BE SO IN DENIAL TO THE POINT YOU DENIE SCIENCE, STUDIES, HOW CAN YOU BE THAT MUCH ANTIPATHIC TO THE POINT YOU DENIE THE PAINFUL EXPERIENCES OF YOUR SON (ME) THAT HIS TRYING TO BETTER HIS SITUATION FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR BELIEFS, YOUR EXPERIENCES, YOUR OBSERVATIONS ????!!!!!!!!!
HOW PRIVILEDGE ARE YOU TO ACT LIKE THAT ?!!! IF YOU WERE BORN IN THE SAME YEAR AS ME YOU'D BOTH BE INCEL ROTTING, KHHV !!!
YOU GAVE ME THAT FACE THAT LED TO ME BEING REJECTED !!!!! I'M TRYING TO IMPROVE MY SITUATION BY MAKING MY OWN MONEY TO PAY FOR THE OPERATIONS I WANT TO DO ON MYSELF, YET YOU REFUSE ????!!!!! AT THE VERY LEAST YOU SOULD COMPENSATE FOR ALL THE THE PAIN ME AND MY SISTER EXPERIENCED BECAUSE OF THE FACE YOU GAVE TO US, BECAUSE, FOR A BRIEF MOMENT, YOUR FRICKING INSTINCTS OF REPRODUCTION TOOK OVER INSTEAD OF BEING HONEST AND REFLECTING : "MAYBE WE SOULDN'T MAKE KIDS BECAUSE OF OUR FACES", BY PAYING FOR OUR SURGERIES !!!!!!!
But I'm not going to give up. Fuck them if I end up being disowned, i don't care at that point.
Today, I went by myself to the bank asking them if I could make another online bank account that only I had the access to and they said it was possible and that they were going to do it. I'll be able to order things online and make transactions (online and in real life with the help of a new credit card) on my own.
Also for the sake of the tourism management course I had to find a company in which I'll work for 2 weeks a month alongside the remaining two weeks of the month dedicated to classes and learning theory. I have been accepted by a company in a large city far away from my parents, that is willing to let me sleep there ! I'll have plenty of option regarding plastic surgeons and with the help of my new own bank account (and my money withdrawn from my other account and then put into that new one), I'll be able to undergo surgery without my parents or anyone of my family knowing.
BUT MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING ROBBING MY CHANCES TO EVER EXPERIENCE HUGS, CARE, AFFECTION, LOVE AND THOSE CUNTS DON'T EVEN RECOGNISE IT.
I had tough arguments (in the sense that i was insulted, seen as insane and out of touch with reality) by my parents, especially my mom.
I tried to be calm, explain that I wanted to work, even though I'm "just" 18, in order to get the remaining money I need for my surgery, they refused, thinking I was crazy for saying that it will improve my chances at getting a partner, and that I shouldn't waste it on those procedures.
I had another arguments where I tried to blackpill them by talking about the halo effect, how my father's colleagues (my father is 5ft6, good thing I'm 2 inches taller than him) were probably making more money than him for the same job just because they are taller, how we are animals and select genes to ensure that the genetic offspring is good and that looks do matter, but those IDIOTS KEPT TRYING TO PROVE ME WRONG WITH INCORECTS ARGUMENTS, MY DAD SAYING HE WAS MAKING MORE THAT A TALLER COLLEGUE THAT WAS WORKING IN A LOWER ECHELON, LOWER PAID JOB FOR THE COMPANY. HOW FUCKING STUPID IS HE ??!
MY SISTER GOT BULLIED BY OTHER GIRL AT SCHOOL BECAUSE HER NOSE IS TOO BIG AND UNDEFINED, I TOLD MY MOM, AND SHE RESPONDED "JUST DON'T LISTEN TO THEM" !! YEAH, YEAH, JUST IGNORE CONTINIOUS SETS OF WORDS THAT CAN CRUSH SOMEONE'S SELF ESTEEM AND DO PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE, IT'S THAT EASY !!! NO FUCKING EMPATHY FOR HER DAUGHER (MY SISTER) WHO'S ALREADY MENTALY DISABLED (speaking, focusing, socializing, and brain development problems, thankfully she has a good close circle of friends).
The other day I decided to act on my own, as I wanted to improve on my teeth, I found a guide on looksmax.org written by pneumo about teeth whitening via bleaching, I bought the materials off of Amazon in fear that my parents would find out because they have access to my bank account. I was so afraid of being in another argument I started crying, because I know how it'll be once they'll find out.
In 30 minutes they found out, and same as last time, but even worse. I tried to justify myself about my desire to improve my teeth's color, they made me cancel the things I had ordered. I kind of crashed out, and in doing so, I showed the studies I had saved about women's preferences on dating apps (the famous Cupid data), I showed them papers on the importance of the face, how the perceived personality of oneself was more positively rated the greater he was rated physically by women.
I was crying because again, I had put all my hopes in this, yet, my parents were the obstacle.
OF COURSE THEY FRICKING STILL ARE !!!!!
AND AGAIN, THEIR STUPIDITY SHOWED ; MY MOTHER TELLING ME NUMBERS AND SCIENCE CAN'T EXPLAIN LOVE WHEN I WAS TELLING THEM THAT "LOVE" (conditional of course) ALWAYS STARTS WITH PHYSICAL ATTRACTION !!! MY MOTHER TELLING ME TO IGNORE THESE GIRLS : "THAT IS JUST A THING THEY SAID AT A GIVEN MOMENT" WHEN I ARRIEVED DURING THE FIRST WEEK OF THE TOURISM MANADGMENT COURSE AND ALL I HEAR FROM THE GIRLS IN MY CLASS WAS THEM CHATTING ABOUT LOOKS OF THEIR EX, OF CELEBRITIES OR DUDES THEY WOULD FIND ONLINE.
THEY TOLD ME OTHER COULD TELL I WAS INSECURE, SCARED OF PEOPLE (I WASN'T BEFORE BEING REJECTED BY AN EIGTH DIFFERENT GIRL, SO THEIR ARGUMENT MAKES NO SENSE AND THEY KNOW IT (THEY KNOW ABOUT ME BEING REJECTED)) BECAUSE OF INSTINCS BECAUSE WE ARE ANIMALS AND CAN SENSE IT, "WELL HOW ABOUT LOOKS MAKING UP THE VAST MAJORITY OF WHAT INSTINCTS ARE SEARCHING FOR WHEN LOOKING FOR A PARTNER ?!" BUT OF COURSE, OF COURSE ! I WASN'T HEARD, IT WAS DISMISSED AS SOME NONSENSE.
THEY KEPT TELLING TO GO OUTSIDE, TO OBSERVE THE REAL WORLD, TO SEE PEOPLE AND FIX MY PERSONALITY (WHICH IS PARTIALLY GENETICALLY HEREDITED BTW), AND WHEN I WAS CALLING OUT THEIR GENERALISATION OF EXCEPTIONS (e.g. short men being with someone), THEY JUST BRUSHED IT OFF !!!
(other things were told but it's not as important so I won't write it here)
HOW CAN YOU BE SO IN DENIAL TO THE POINT YOU DENIE SCIENCE, STUDIES, HOW CAN YOU BE THAT MUCH ANTIPATHIC TO THE POINT YOU DENIE THE PAINFUL EXPERIENCES OF YOUR SON (ME) THAT HIS TRYING TO BETTER HIS SITUATION FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR BELIEFS, YOUR EXPERIENCES, YOUR OBSERVATIONS ????!!!!!!!!!
HOW PRIVILEDGE ARE YOU TO ACT LIKE THAT ?!!! IF YOU WERE BORN IN THE SAME YEAR AS ME YOU'D BOTH BE INCEL ROTTING, KHHV !!!
YOU GAVE ME THAT FACE THAT LED TO ME BEING REJECTED !!!!! I'M TRYING TO IMPROVE MY SITUATION BY MAKING MY OWN MONEY TO PAY FOR THE OPERATIONS I WANT TO DO ON MYSELF, YET YOU REFUSE ????!!!!! AT THE VERY LEAST YOU SOULD COMPENSATE FOR ALL THE THE PAIN ME AND MY SISTER EXPERIENCED BECAUSE OF THE FACE YOU GAVE TO US, BECAUSE, FOR A BRIEF MOMENT, YOUR FRICKING INSTINCTS OF REPRODUCTION TOOK OVER INSTEAD OF BEING HONEST AND REFLECTING : "MAYBE WE SOULDN'T MAKE KIDS BECAUSE OF OUR FACES", BY PAYING FOR OUR SURGERIES !!!!!!!
But I'm not going to give up. Fuck them if I end up being disowned, i don't care at that point.
Today, I went by myself to the bank asking them if I could make another online bank account that only I had the access to and they said it was possible and that they were going to do it. I'll be able to order things online and make transactions (online and in real life with the help of a new credit card) on my own.
Also for the sake of the tourism management course I had to find a company in which I'll work for 2 weeks a month alongside the remaining two weeks of the month dedicated to classes and learning theory. I have been accepted by a company in a large city far away from my parents, that is willing to let me sleep there ! I'll have plenty of option regarding plastic surgeons and with the help of my new own bank account (and my money withdrawn from my other account and then put into that new one), I'll be able to undergo surgery without my parents or anyone of my family knowing.
