I wish that someone can come into my life and save me from my current life.
My current life is just me staying indoors, going for walks and going to soup kitchens when I'm broke.
And the staff and patrons of these soup kitchens are boomers, christcucks, single mothers and druggies.
I go out often because I don't like staying cooped up in my flat all day, but I want to share my existence with someone, not live it alone.
Making social connections is a lot more difficult when your older, and most people already have their own social circle, their own friend group.
So they'll have no need for you, they'll see you as an outsider.
Even if you did get friendly with one person in this group, the others will still see you as an outside encroaching on their territory.
I've been feeling like utter shit lately.
First, my hair is receding really bad, and its getting worse with each passing day.
The roots on my scalp are going further up my head.
When I style it and part it with a wet comb, it looks...ok, but I still don't like it.
My area is also really windy and sometimes when I'm out, the wind blows my hair back and fucks it up, so I have to fix it.
I know I can get a hair transplant, but their expensive as fuck, the price is well into the thousands.
That's cash I don't have, I have no savings and I rarely even have £500.
Speaking of which, I'm constantly broke, and even if I did have money, I wouldn't know what to do with it.
There's nothing material that I want.
I do not want a console or any other gaming crap, I don't collect nerdy merch or any of that consoomer shit, and I'm good for clothes.
Something that I would really want is to be happy, I haven't been happy in years.
There were brief moments in the past where I felt good like when I interact with someone or receive a parcel from ebay, but they were very brief.
And once the feeling was gone, I just feel empty and unsure of what to do next.
Believe me, I wish I wasn't living this life, I want to have friends, a girlfriend, live at a better place and one day, to have my own children... be a father.
That's a dream of mine, I wish it could be a reality, but it sadly won't.
Nobody wants to be my friend, woman hate me, ignore me, avoid me, give me weird looks and they think i'm creepy, ugly and weird.
They won't want to sleep with me, or have my sperm or carry my offspring within them.
At this point, I'm pretty much a genetic dead end.
And worse of all, I have half-siblings who have way better lives than me, they have partners and have children.
Meanwhile, I don't and I won't, not by choice.
I've been thinking about roping a lot lately, but I have no cash right now to buy a rope.
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXvIIvIYlgk&list=PLEysYGf8q8sr5cPbf5jNooA_6pEXGgVMm&index=2&pp=gAQBiAQB8AUB
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i77S8l-7-3Y&list=PLEysYGf8q8sr5cPbf5jNooA_6pEXGgVMm&index=1&pp=gAQBiAQB8AUB
My current life is just me staying indoors, going for walks and going to soup kitchens when I'm broke.
And the staff and patrons of these soup kitchens are boomers, christcucks, single mothers and druggies.
I go out often because I don't like staying cooped up in my flat all day, but I want to share my existence with someone, not live it alone.
Making social connections is a lot more difficult when your older, and most people already have their own social circle, their own friend group.
So they'll have no need for you, they'll see you as an outsider.
Even if you did get friendly with one person in this group, the others will still see you as an outside encroaching on their territory.
I've been feeling like utter shit lately.
First, my hair is receding really bad, and its getting worse with each passing day.
The roots on my scalp are going further up my head.
When I style it and part it with a wet comb, it looks...ok, but I still don't like it.
My area is also really windy and sometimes when I'm out, the wind blows my hair back and fucks it up, so I have to fix it.
I know I can get a hair transplant, but their expensive as fuck, the price is well into the thousands.
That's cash I don't have, I have no savings and I rarely even have £500.
Speaking of which, I'm constantly broke, and even if I did have money, I wouldn't know what to do with it.
There's nothing material that I want.
I do not want a console or any other gaming crap, I don't collect nerdy merch or any of that consoomer shit, and I'm good for clothes.
Something that I would really want is to be happy, I haven't been happy in years.
There were brief moments in the past where I felt good like when I interact with someone or receive a parcel from ebay, but they were very brief.
And once the feeling was gone, I just feel empty and unsure of what to do next.
Believe me, I wish I wasn't living this life, I want to have friends, a girlfriend, live at a better place and one day, to have my own children... be a father.
That's a dream of mine, I wish it could be a reality, but it sadly won't.
Nobody wants to be my friend, woman hate me, ignore me, avoid me, give me weird looks and they think i'm creepy, ugly and weird.
They won't want to sleep with me, or have my sperm or carry my offspring within them.
At this point, I'm pretty much a genetic dead end.
And worse of all, I have half-siblings who have way better lives than me, they have partners and have children.
Meanwhile, I don't and I won't, not by choice.
I've been thinking about roping a lot lately, but I have no cash right now to buy a rope.
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXvIIvIYlgk&list=PLEysYGf8q8sr5cPbf5jNooA_6pEXGgVMm&index=2&pp=gAQBiAQB8AUB
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i77S8l-7-3Y&list=PLEysYGf8q8sr5cPbf5jNooA_6pEXGgVMm&index=1&pp=gAQBiAQB8AUB
