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Blackpill I need some help

D

drowninsolitude

Greycel
Joined
Apr 20, 2022
Posts
77
My mom is attractive, but my dad is ugly, both inside and out. He gave me an ugly nose on a not bad face, which is the only thing I think about during the day: my nose, and getting surgery to fix it. I've been called ugly by both guys and girls (specially by the later) since I was a teen, which leaded me to mysoginistic forums and looksmaxing forums. There, I understood why being on the autism spectrum wasn't why girls my age ignored me, behaved coldly when talking to them, why people my age bullied me, why I was called ugly, why my face was always the worst looking in group pictures, etc. I developed an obsession that I carried to this day, and that was almost 3 years ago.

Anyways, my nose isn't my only flaw. I have a weak jawline, weak chin, long philtrum, close-set eyes and shitty upper lip. Everything I inherited from my father, to be more clear.

Ugly people also get told to develop good personalities and to be social, which is really hard to me because I'm not neurotypical, and really bitter and vindictive (for average and attractive people). And if you're going to suggest to seek therapy, I'm already on therapy for an addiction to electronic devices I developed some years ago. Honestly, I do want a better personality, that will compliment my new face (surgery is never going to go out of my mind).

My dad spends a lot of time cheating on my mother in dating APPs. My mum knows that but she still loves him, even though their relationship it's not open, actually. My father got caught, but he still does all this behind my mum's back. I'm not a good person, either. I enter mental breakdowns because I never tell anyone (in real life) anything. So I accumulate a lot of bitterness, anger, stress, etc., to a point in which I become violent towards the closest persons I live with (my parents), to a point of physical violence. I'm also in therapy for that, and for having violent fantasies against people that hurted me.

"I don't see anything but good sides to my future plan. The only downside can be not ending good-looking. In that case, I have two options: suicide, or trying to "accept" being ugly looking.

In all of this, I'll have to get therapy after getting the surgeries because I dislike women. I'm not hot enought to be liked by them, so I'll just cheat my genetics and become a hottie.

I also want revenge, so getting the world reversed (instead of being ugly, being hot) will make me superior to those subhumans. If I'd rule the world, I'd have sent them to a concentration camp, and gassed the shit out of them, but we live in a world where ugly people are born just to be bullied by average and attractive people. Pieces of shit, I hope most of these humans die in accidents. Or better, get deformed, so that I could call them ugly and make them suffer" (quote from a post of mine in Reddit).

I'm really tired of living this way, and I want to change, but the main issue is that I lack empathy. Since I was little, I've been unable to think about something but myself. I can't really put myself into someone's else shoes. What should I do?
 
you really think ima read that shit, nigga?
 
That’s an FBI agent if I’ve seen one.
 
My mom is attractive, but my dad is ugly, both inside and out. He gave me an ugly nose on a not bad face, which is the only thing I think about during the day: my nose, and getting surgery to fix it. I've been called ugly by both guys and girls (specially by the later) since I was a teen, which leaded me to mysoginistic forums and looksmaxing forums. There, I understood why being on the autism spectrum wasn't why girls my age ignored me, behaved coldly when talking to them, why people my age bullied me, why I was called ugly, why my face was always the worst looking in group pictures, etc. I developed an obsession that I carried to this day, and that was almost 3 years ago.

Anyways, my nose isn't my only flaw. I have a weak jawline, weak chin, long philtrum, close-set eyes and shitty upper lip. Everything I inherited from my father, to be more clear.

Ugly people also get told to develop good personalities and to be social, which is really hard to me because I'm not neurotypical, and really bitter and vindictive (for average and attractive people). And if you're going to suggest to seek therapy, I'm already on therapy for an addiction to electronic devices I developed some years ago. Honestly, I do want a better personality, that will compliment my new face (surgery is never going to go out of my mind).

My dad spends a lot of time cheating on my mother in dating APPs. My mum knows that but she still loves him, even though their relationship it's not open, actually. My father got caught, but he still does all this behind my mum's back. I'm not a good person, either. I enter mental breakdowns because I never tell anyone (in real life) anything. So I accumulate a lot of bitterness, anger, stress, etc., to a point in which I become violent towards the closest persons I live with (my parents), to a point of physical violence. I'm also in therapy for that, and for having violent fantasies against people that hurted me.

"I don't see anything but good sides to my future plan. The only downside can be not ending good-looking. In that case, I have two options: suicide, or trying to "accept" being ugly looking.

In all of this, I'll have to get therapy after getting the surgeries because I dislike women. I'm not hot enought to be liked by them, so I'll just cheat my genetics and become a hottie.

I also want revenge, so getting the world reversed (instead of being ugly, being hot) will make me superior to those subhumans. If I'd rule the world, I'd have sent them to a concentration camp, and gassed the shit out of them, but we live in a world where ugly people are born just to be bullied by average and attractive people. Pieces of shit, I hope most of these humans die in accidents. Or better, get deformed, so that I could call them ugly and make them suffer" (quote from a post of mine in Reddit).

I'm really tired of living this way, and I want to change, but the main issue is that I lack empathy. Since I was little, I've been unable to think about something but myself. I can't really put myself into someone's else shoes. What should I do?
I read all of it OP and tbh I can and relate understand what you say,except the part about feeling no empathy,I think you can,you are just trying to be edgy.When I used to feel frustrated lkke this,I used to write what I felt,it calmed down my anger,highly recommended.
 
This world only Sees wrong in man and never in Woman , however repulsive , Fat and disgusting they are .

Really there is No Need for you to Appeal to this Shit when you know , If you where a Woman , everone would Lick your A$$ :feelsclown::feelsclown::feelsclown:
 

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