"your not entitled to a girlfriend, you sweaty loser!" 
Exactly how I feel. It's like giving a thanksgiving feast to a starving veteran who never had a proper meal his whole life. The memories of being starved for days on end will come crawling back after the initial dopamine from the feast wears off. His baseline quality of life has already been set by his childhood and teenage experiences. It's just not possible to forget all the injustices you have been through and all the bullshit you had to put up with from people, even if you get everything you want. The core mechanisms that fucked you up are still at play and are ruining the lives of fellow men like you and that thought will always linger in my mind sadly. The only way to make me blissfully happy is complete amnesia.
