D
Doomer Guy
Deleted my account because this site is so dumb...
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- Joined
- Aug 29, 2022
- Posts
- 2,049
I don't know what to do anymore, I have to vent about this because I feel like I'm in an impossible situation...
I live every single day of my life since years with chronic physical and psychological pain. The physical part is my chronic muscle stiffness, it's so severe that even a gentle pressure on any of my body parts you can name (arms, legs, chest, back, etc.) will give me some pain, a weird electric discharge and a tearing sensation in the muscle. I believe my poor back posture and wrist posture might be what fucked up my entire neuro-musculoskeletal system, but it's not completely my fault because my poor visual acuity forces me to slouch when reading and writing (man I wish I could afford new glasses...)
The psychological part of my chronic pain is loneliness and a general lack of respect from everyone. I'm for sure an undiagnosed autist because I swear each time I got into social situations, I always struggled to figure out about obvious clues and other peoples' thoughts and feelings about my actions. I also suffer from OCD, a mental disorder that's widely known as the "hand-washing obsession" but it actually goes much deeper than that (not entering into details cuz it would make my topic too long and it's outside the targeted subject) and that can make me look goofy and retarded in public.
I'm also the weakest-looking person in the room, not only because of my recessed jaw (both of my parents have a recessed jaw so it never began for me in that category) but also because I only weight 100 lbs at a height of 5'8 (again not my fault, my ancestors from my mother's side are all extremely skinny so I clearly inherited the skinny genes from them).
This makes me insecure because I can feel how girls (in fact not just girls but everyone) despises me just by looking at me, my non-NT mental traits, my face and my body clearly give to others the image of an ugly, mentally retarded weakling.
So yeah I think we can all agree I'm doomed to live in shame and loneliness?
But to make everything worse, my retarded parents are completely unsupportive (and that's the main reason I hate them). They believe I'm too young for chronic physical pain (when I swear it's 100% REAL I feel it EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY) and also that I can't have psychological pain because I didn't had enough interactions with the outside world for that (dumb argument because loneliness is a pain you can BY DEFINITION experience without going in the outside world). As a result, they expect me to act like a happy and mentally sane person, but I just can't. And because I don't, they shout at me, blame me, insult me, make me suffer, when I don't deserve any of this, I'm really the victim here and they're the abusers. I wish I could afford an apartment, I'm so tired of living with them...
I can't study anymore. I can't exercice anymore. I can't watch movies with them anymore. I can't talk with them anymore. I can't even play video games anymore.
Please believe me when I say that my pain is SO SEVERE that I can't do ANY of the things mentioned above anymore. The pain is way too much of a distraction.
My question is, what's the solution to this? How do I numb this pain? I need a quick solution to make the pain instantly disappear at least temporarily, it can't wait at all because I'm already too much behind with my studies and there's no way for me to work in these inhumane conditions.
Please tell me any ideas you have for me. Anything, absolutely anything, no matter the consequences for me or the others! It's such an extreme emergency that any idea is appreciated! You guys on incels.is are the only people that I can trust enough to understand about what I'm talking about...
TL;DR I live every single day of my life since years with chronic physical and psychological pain, and my retarded parents worsen the situation by telling me I'm just lazy and it's all in my head (I wish I could afford an apartment, I'm so tired of living with them...) I'm forced to live with 2 people who are making me sick just by being in my presence and I can't function at all anymore, I can't study I can't do physical exercice I can't do ANYTHING because the pain is way too strong and it distracts me too much from the things I should be doing. I need ideas to instantly get rid of this pain, at least temporarily, yes instantly because I can't wait since I'm too behind with so many things in life...
I live every single day of my life since years with chronic physical and psychological pain. The physical part is my chronic muscle stiffness, it's so severe that even a gentle pressure on any of my body parts you can name (arms, legs, chest, back, etc.) will give me some pain, a weird electric discharge and a tearing sensation in the muscle. I believe my poor back posture and wrist posture might be what fucked up my entire neuro-musculoskeletal system, but it's not completely my fault because my poor visual acuity forces me to slouch when reading and writing (man I wish I could afford new glasses...)
The psychological part of my chronic pain is loneliness and a general lack of respect from everyone. I'm for sure an undiagnosed autist because I swear each time I got into social situations, I always struggled to figure out about obvious clues and other peoples' thoughts and feelings about my actions. I also suffer from OCD, a mental disorder that's widely known as the "hand-washing obsession" but it actually goes much deeper than that (not entering into details cuz it would make my topic too long and it's outside the targeted subject) and that can make me look goofy and retarded in public.
I'm also the weakest-looking person in the room, not only because of my recessed jaw (both of my parents have a recessed jaw so it never began for me in that category) but also because I only weight 100 lbs at a height of 5'8 (again not my fault, my ancestors from my mother's side are all extremely skinny so I clearly inherited the skinny genes from them).
This makes me insecure because I can feel how girls (in fact not just girls but everyone) despises me just by looking at me, my non-NT mental traits, my face and my body clearly give to others the image of an ugly, mentally retarded weakling.
So yeah I think we can all agree I'm doomed to live in shame and loneliness?
But to make everything worse, my retarded parents are completely unsupportive (and that's the main reason I hate them). They believe I'm too young for chronic physical pain (when I swear it's 100% REAL I feel it EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY) and also that I can't have psychological pain because I didn't had enough interactions with the outside world for that (dumb argument because loneliness is a pain you can BY DEFINITION experience without going in the outside world). As a result, they expect me to act like a happy and mentally sane person, but I just can't. And because I don't, they shout at me, blame me, insult me, make me suffer, when I don't deserve any of this, I'm really the victim here and they're the abusers. I wish I could afford an apartment, I'm so tired of living with them...
I can't study anymore. I can't exercice anymore. I can't watch movies with them anymore. I can't talk with them anymore. I can't even play video games anymore.
Please believe me when I say that my pain is SO SEVERE that I can't do ANY of the things mentioned above anymore. The pain is way too much of a distraction.
My question is, what's the solution to this? How do I numb this pain? I need a quick solution to make the pain instantly disappear at least temporarily, it can't wait at all because I'm already too much behind with my studies and there's no way for me to work in these inhumane conditions.
Please tell me any ideas you have for me. Anything, absolutely anything, no matter the consequences for me or the others! It's such an extreme emergency that any idea is appreciated! You guys on incels.is are the only people that I can trust enough to understand about what I'm talking about...
TL;DR I live every single day of my life since years with chronic physical and psychological pain, and my retarded parents worsen the situation by telling me I'm just lazy and it's all in my head (I wish I could afford an apartment, I'm so tired of living with them...) I'm forced to live with 2 people who are making me sick just by being in my presence and I can't function at all anymore, I can't study I can't do physical exercice I can't do ANYTHING because the pain is way too strong and it distracts me too much from the things I should be doing. I need ideas to instantly get rid of this pain, at least temporarily, yes instantly because I can't wait since I'm too behind with so many things in life...