i am trying to stay away from this forum,but considering the amount of pain in these posts,i felt like i had to post something. i became a catholic after already being fully blackpilled(i think i wasn't even christrian when i started browsing this website.),so it seems my experience with christ has been a bit different compared to most people here
. the curse of inceldom is a hard one.God sometimes gives these curses of complete poverty from the normal pleasures of life.Many of the saints died in extreme pains after suffering for several years of every horrible disease you can think of.saint jacinta had a surgery done on her without any anesthetics,and our holy mother communicated with her who knows how many times,so it's not like direct connection with christ and his saints will spare you from the pains of life.christ himself lived a life of humiliation(from god to human is the greatest humiliation i have ever seen.) as a random chump carpenter amongst degenerates of all kind and died a painful and humiliating death.
Our lord himself told about homeless lazarus,who had to suffer in homelessness and pain and probably inceldom too,whilst living right next to the rich and powerful. whilst i don't think inceldom can be compared to suffering from horrible diseases and being in physical pain 24/7(i have had stomach problems and man when you are in pain,your mind goes numb from anything you think troubles you at the moment),the suffering is still horrible and perhaps after long years of suffering amounts to the same level as those who suffer greatly for a few years.Many of us will have to deal with this till the day we die.I have seen many of my brothers here and even family,destroy themselves over their inceldom.drugs,alcohol,prostitution,suicide etc etc. this life kills us and many of us here have lost their faith in gods love when they realized zero pleasure in this life would be given to them.most normies will have good things happen to them,and contemplating god's actions will barely seem like a necessity for them.us who suffer daily and beg for any method of escape,will question god 24/7 as many of us either want to degenerate to escape from the pain,or will question their effort to get closer to god(prayer,alms etc) when god seems so far away.
if you want to give your celibacy to christ,then do it,but do it right.go to a monastery or a friars order.few man are ready to live the celibate life alone.if you want to wait and marriage is truly your calling then wait and persevere in this hard life with christ.even if marriage is your vocation,the chances of you getting a wife are still slim if you are truly an incel. it is true that we will be rewarded in heaven, with our own gifts that only us will have,but to withstand pain for those gifts which at times,those promises seem like a mockery of your suffering,is hard.
Iisten to my short story. I was a good christian for 20 years. Always thought God would help me. I tried everything to be a good man and christian. And what did i get? Inceldom, everyday mental pain, suffering, loneliness…i don‘t even know how long i can take it. So either he doesn‘t exist or doesn‘t care at all.
after a few years of being a christrian,i think i am starting to understand some of your pain.Where you protestant? not that it matters for the question at hand,but protestant backhome are rare(though they are loud),so i find it curious finding protestant folk here
Same. I unironically know more about Roman Catholicism and Eastern Orthodoxy than the Pope does. I know off the top of my head, for example that the 7th Ecumenical Council was called to address the question of iconoclasm, and the 5th Ecumenical Council was called to kill any potential Nestorian interpretation of the 4th (Pope Vigilius argued seriously against clarifying a supposed Holy Spirit guided Ecumenical Council). I know also that Vatican II expressly repudiates Pope Pius XI’s “Mortalium Animos”.
I prayed an hour every day, did vegan lents, and even took insufferably cold showers to quell temptations to jerking off.
After enough soul-searching after always feeling guilty subconsciously (always being social outcast always made me feel guilty of something), I knew deep down what it was - I’m using this as an escapism from life. I never loved God or anybody. From the moment puberty hit to now I was always judged immediately for how I looked, and even if I look more “normal” than I ever did before, I’m so scarred mentally that I cannot ever view the world as just or people as anything other than tunnel visioned animals - consciously thinking they are trying to do good, wanting to kill off people like me subconsciously.
I’ve come to realize that there is no loving God who gives fairness, justice, love, and if there is, my lot in nature is to be genetically killed off. All I have now is my mind and trying to ascend to some level of divinity, which is now permanently disconnected from time.
I mean many friars,priests,monks,theologians,writers etc etc know what you know and yet sold out when it came to fornicating,adultery,drinking etc etc etc. Knowledge means little if it isn't rightly supplied with the other gifts that god provides.adam,eve,judas knew much more then most devoted catholic ever knew,yet sold out when temptation came.
The story about you not loving god is brutal. Not sure if you truly really never loved god,but it's easy to see people who only go to church,for the community,a promised afterlife,for a wife,connections,etc,etc. i hope one day you come to christ again.
