Sometimes after watching porn, I'll will watch gore to try to let go off of my anger or seeing couples in my college. Sometimes I imagine myself dead or me doing it in the cartel videos. I fucking hate my existence and I know I will always fail in everything in life. Not to mention my birth day is next week, so I'm still a virgin. I want to end myself and i have tried to strangle myself a couple of times but I was too much of pussy. I don't think I'm gonna make in my twenties if I fail college. I think if I fail college, that will be the lit that started the fuse. I try to sign up to the navy, but they said I couldn't because I have medication. I hope foid luck be merciful.
