I've speculated and speculated in the void, especially the horrible social climate we live in, where men and women feel like they are unable to embrace who they are and dating is fucked. For some reason men can't embrace who they are called to be as men and women can't embrace who they are called to be as women.
I still feel though deep down man has a higher form of consciousness that separates him from the rest of the primitive beasts - call it a rational soul, made in the image of God, God's divine spark, etc. that has allowed him to achieve such grand things just from believing in an ideal. A man is capable of a dream and putting his dreams into action and making it a reality that is beyond anything he could've conceptualized, even in the darkest pits of hell.
I don't know, most relationships I've experienced via proxy with are fucking miserable. One person has total dominance over the other, there is no sexual chemistry, or perhaps nothing but sexual chemistry, or they don't know why they are dating, or they were just friends and they decided to go out because they don't have any other options, or its just a show of social status or social subordination - "fuck I need to not be a single used up whore, Ill settle for my chubby engineer"
Yet every once in a blue moon, I will meet people and their couples whom I truly believe there is something "supernatural" about it. My best friend's girlfriend (going on 5 years) are truly in love with each other - and no it's not perfect - but they truly love each other because they are mirrors of each other, and share similar ideals of what they want from life. They are both weirdos, and I love them both.
Do you think there's something real about that? Do you think if I bent a knee to God - some God, any God, even Satan himself - for a spiritual partner - that I can meet my opposite and find fulfillment? Would he answer if I did everything it took to meet that spiritual opposite.
Me personally, I don't know. I do know that we all have karmic lots and some deformed weirdos will never meet their spiritual opposite. Perhaps mine is to be the weird autistic fedora wearing single uncle.
What I do know is that I didn't do enough to pursue women when I was younger, and focused on other things, and I have crippling regret. I am willing to mentally accept the fact that I will die alone. I don't know if spiritually or physiologically I can.
I still feel though deep down man has a higher form of consciousness that separates him from the rest of the primitive beasts - call it a rational soul, made in the image of God, God's divine spark, etc. that has allowed him to achieve such grand things just from believing in an ideal. A man is capable of a dream and putting his dreams into action and making it a reality that is beyond anything he could've conceptualized, even in the darkest pits of hell.
I don't know, most relationships I've experienced via proxy with are fucking miserable. One person has total dominance over the other, there is no sexual chemistry, or perhaps nothing but sexual chemistry, or they don't know why they are dating, or they were just friends and they decided to go out because they don't have any other options, or its just a show of social status or social subordination - "fuck I need to not be a single used up whore, Ill settle for my chubby engineer"
Yet every once in a blue moon, I will meet people and their couples whom I truly believe there is something "supernatural" about it. My best friend's girlfriend (going on 5 years) are truly in love with each other - and no it's not perfect - but they truly love each other because they are mirrors of each other, and share similar ideals of what they want from life. They are both weirdos, and I love them both.
Do you think there's something real about that? Do you think if I bent a knee to God - some God, any God, even Satan himself - for a spiritual partner - that I can meet my opposite and find fulfillment? Would he answer if I did everything it took to meet that spiritual opposite.
Me personally, I don't know. I do know that we all have karmic lots and some deformed weirdos will never meet their spiritual opposite. Perhaps mine is to be the weird autistic fedora wearing single uncle.
What I do know is that I didn't do enough to pursue women when I was younger, and focused on other things, and I have crippling regret. I am willing to mentally accept the fact that I will die alone. I don't know if spiritually or physiologically I can.
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