I will be really honest I think an INCEL has like the whole package of AvPD symptoms, combined of course with hatred and resentment/rumination that are connected to AvPD too. Those are all the signs I found of Avoidant Personality Disorder, like I said, I know it's way more complex that this and it might sound as someone just weak, but I believe all of us have this at least partially:
- Avoidance of Occupational Activities: Trying to stay away from jobs or tasks that require significant interpersonal contact out of intense fear of criticism, disapproval, or rejection.
- Selective Social Involvement: Generally refusing to get involved with people unless there is an absolute certainty of being liked and accepted.
- Restraint in Intimate Relationships: Being extremely cautious or "closed off" even with close partners due to the fear of being ridiculed, shamed, or humiliated.
- Hypersensitivity to Negative Evaluation: Being constantly preoccupied with, and deeply hurt by, any potential sign of criticism or rejection or aggression in social encounters.
- New Situation Inhibition: Feeling "frozen," quiet, or socially inhibited in new interpersonal situations because of pervasive feelings of inadequacy.
- Inferiority Complex: Viewing oneself as socially inept, personally unappealing, or fundamentally inferior to others.
(I think there is a both inferiority and superiority complex) - Extreme Risk Avoidance: Being unusually reluctant to take personal risks or engage in new activities that might lead to embarrassment.
- Post-Event Rumination: Obsessively replaying past social interactions to "dissect" perceived mistakes, awkward moments, or subtle signs of rejection.
- Internalized Anger: Harboring deep-seated anger or aggression that is often suppressed to maintain a "people-pleasing" or amicable exterior.
- Volcanic Outbursts: Experiencing sudden, intense eruptions of irritability or "explosive" anger when suppressed emotions finally build up and overflow.
- Self-Directed Hostility: Turning anger inward, resulting in harsh self-criticism, self-loathing, and blaming oneself for social failures.
(I think this one ain't much self directed for us INCELS but it's much about the outside too) - Chronic Silent Resentment: Nursing long-term wounds or feelings of being overlooked because of an inability to communicate needs or set boundaries.
- Resentment of Social Ease: Feeling a sense of injustice or bitterness toward those who seem to navigate social worlds effortlessly.
- Hypervigilance: Constantly "scanning" the environment and others' facial expressions to detect even the slightest hint of disapproval or dislike.
- Anticipatory Anxiety: Ruminating on future social events by imagining every possible way they might go wrong or lead to humiliation.
- Emotional "Shutting Down": Withdrawing or becoming passive-aggressive when upset, rather than expressing anger directly.
- Relationship Self-Sabotage: Preemptively abandoning friendships or romantic connections out of a fearful "certainty" that the other person will eventually reject them.
(Here too it's not that simple at all but whatever) - Anhedonia and Isolation: Choosing total social isolation and losing interest in once-pleasurable activities because the fear of rejection outweighs any potential reward.
- Low Persistence: A tendency to give up on goals or social efforts immediately upon encountering the slightest obstacle or sign of friction.
If you actually read it, what do you think? I believe there is a significant and undeniable link between INCELS and the development of AvPD after ostracism, humiliation and rejection, nothing much more to say really.
