SuicideFuel Depressing reality - continuation

[VainHireling]

I don't wanna be a part of this society.
I don't wanna live like this.
I don't wanna stay weak despite my earnest efforts in becoming more.
Over several years I've tried many ways of improving myself, turning into someone more capable and more respectable, but results didn't matter much to anyone. not even myself.
I don't have the balls to rope.

EDIT:
I wanted to commit suicide once. And it was about the same thing plus a rejection by lanky, vegeterian post-wall foid I was spamming about when I started posting under VainHireling username.
But I did find some inspiration (or was it a God's Grace) to start lifting heavier and it improved my mental state for the time being.

 

[VainHireling]

are u gymaxxed?

I can say my gym performance is decent, I narrow-grip bench my body weight (70 kgs), barbell row (60 kgs) and squat (70 kg in plates + my bodyweight)
I do well. And I look like this:
https://incels.is/threads/i-look-decent-from-the-neck-down.389738/