This is one of the most important threads I have written to date, and I've been brooding over it for quite a while. It forms a concrete example of concepts that are difficult to put into words. It shows what can happen when religious fundamentalism meets radical feminism.
Our story begins very early in my childhood with a family we were friends with. They were another fundie christian homeschooling family that my mom knew before I was born. All their kids except the youngest daughter (who I will be discussing) were older than me. When we were little kids things were actually quite chill, and I had a lot of good memories playing with them; some of the few kids my age I saw at that time due to homeschooling.
But as the 2010s wore on, their family began to disintegrate. We don't need to go into the details of what happened, but pretty much every kid had some kind of crisis, and the parents divorced in the fray. In short, total collapse and fragmentation—the whole works. One could take this as a data point on the ineffectiveness of fundamentalism at building functional families (a fair argument), but I want to turn our attention to the daughter, who we will call Willow.
As a result of the implosion, it was necessary for the kids to start in actual schools. As I learned from my mother, Willow took part in premarital teenage sex once in the public HS environment, although she apparently recanted from this. Shortly before I left home for college, in summer 2022, Willow and her mother came over to my house. It had been years since I saw them. Willow was also starting college that same fall. It was awkward being around someone I'd known as a kid, knowing that she already experienced sex while I was a sheltered depressed virgin.
So off to college we went (not the same one), and my life didn't appreciably change—and has not. But Willow, as I again learned through my mother, quickly got a stereotypical college boyfriend relationship that was indeed sexual. This continued throughout the years until she apparently had some kind of "awakening" and decided she wanted a "traditional, God-fearing man" (can't make this up). I don't know where the guy currently stands in the equation, but the hypocrisy is clearly demonstrated nonetheless.
Hypocrisy that I on multiple occasions raised to my parents, to no avail. Willow's actions were justified on the basis of repentance (retroactive) and the familial hardships (situational). The latter of these made me particularly enraged. My father, who was always a pro at turning a blind eye to the transgressions of others while enforcing hardline doctrine on me ("keep your own backyard clean" he would say), brushed off my complaints with "she had a very hard life" — so just because my family didn't implode when I was a teenager, I don't get to have sex in HS or college? Is that the argument? All it's ever been: blame me for everything, excuse everyone else, especially foids.
The entire idea that evangelical christianity enforces purity standards only on daughters is a misconception. If anything, in the feminized joke it is today, foids have the rights to dress and do whatever they want, while men are guilted endlessly on "lust" and consumption of pornography (which is somehow put on the same level as actual intercourse) — a practice which is clearly just an attempt to fill the void of female companionship that the church itself was supposed to provide in the first place
I don't want to digress from the dynamics of the original situation itself, but some of this commentary on broader issues is needed. Men in evangelicalism today are expected to be virgins past 30 and be happy with it, and happy with marrying ran-through leftovers like my friend Willow will ultimately become.
In conclusion, we have demonstrated through this example the fusional danger of modern christianity and feminism, which gives free reign to foids while keeping men in sexless cages. And it hurts the most when my own family, who should be supporting and siding with me, turns on me through the justifications described: the retroactive and the situational.
Tagging some frens: @Sloth @cathuluelitist @Tšuudi @Dead End @Extern @Aventador @Tetsuya
Our story begins very early in my childhood with a family we were friends with. They were another fundie christian homeschooling family that my mom knew before I was born. All their kids except the youngest daughter (who I will be discussing) were older than me. When we were little kids things were actually quite chill, and I had a lot of good memories playing with them; some of the few kids my age I saw at that time due to homeschooling.
But as the 2010s wore on, their family began to disintegrate. We don't need to go into the details of what happened, but pretty much every kid had some kind of crisis, and the parents divorced in the fray. In short, total collapse and fragmentation—the whole works. One could take this as a data point on the ineffectiveness of fundamentalism at building functional families (a fair argument), but I want to turn our attention to the daughter, who we will call Willow.
As a result of the implosion, it was necessary for the kids to start in actual schools. As I learned from my mother, Willow took part in premarital teenage sex once in the public HS environment, although she apparently recanted from this. Shortly before I left home for college, in summer 2022, Willow and her mother came over to my house. It had been years since I saw them. Willow was also starting college that same fall. It was awkward being around someone I'd known as a kid, knowing that she already experienced sex while I was a sheltered depressed virgin.
So off to college we went (not the same one), and my life didn't appreciably change—and has not. But Willow, as I again learned through my mother, quickly got a stereotypical college boyfriend relationship that was indeed sexual. This continued throughout the years until she apparently had some kind of "awakening" and decided she wanted a "traditional, God-fearing man" (can't make this up). I don't know where the guy currently stands in the equation, but the hypocrisy is clearly demonstrated nonetheless.
Hypocrisy that I on multiple occasions raised to my parents, to no avail. Willow's actions were justified on the basis of repentance (retroactive) and the familial hardships (situational). The latter of these made me particularly enraged. My father, who was always a pro at turning a blind eye to the transgressions of others while enforcing hardline doctrine on me ("keep your own backyard clean" he would say), brushed off my complaints with "she had a very hard life" — so just because my family didn't implode when I was a teenager, I don't get to have sex in HS or college? Is that the argument? All it's ever been: blame me for everything, excuse everyone else, especially foids.
The entire idea that evangelical christianity enforces purity standards only on daughters is a misconception. If anything, in the feminized joke it is today, foids have the rights to dress and do whatever they want, while men are guilted endlessly on "lust" and consumption of pornography (which is somehow put on the same level as actual intercourse) — a practice which is clearly just an attempt to fill the void of female companionship that the church itself was supposed to provide in the first place
I don't want to digress from the dynamics of the original situation itself, but some of this commentary on broader issues is needed. Men in evangelicalism today are expected to be virgins past 30 and be happy with it, and happy with marrying ran-through leftovers like my friend Willow will ultimately become.
In conclusion, we have demonstrated through this example the fusional danger of modern christianity and feminism, which gives free reign to foids while keeping men in sexless cages. And it hurts the most when my own family, who should be supporting and siding with me, turns on me through the justifications described: the retroactive and the situational.
Tagging some frens: @Sloth @cathuluelitist @Tšuudi @Dead End @Extern @Aventador @Tetsuya
