Serious Your reaction when you first swallowed the blackpill.

[Kokoro]

A few years ago I used to frequent r9k. I saw myself as a robot but for the most part I was kind of purple pilled. I remember all the posts saying "We're all gonna make it brah" and I legitimately believed them. After r9k went to shit (After 2015 Harper shooting) I started to slowly fade away from r9k and became more bluepilled. Fast forward to 2018. A incident at work (Overheard some co-workers calling me the next incel shooter, around the time of Alek) happened. It made me realize that no matter what I do I will never be treated with respect by mainstream society.

While the blackpill is relieving, it is also a burden. The truth is that the world isn't fair, and that hurts. When I was first introduced to this site I was losing my mind. What you guys were saying here fucked with how I saw the world and how I saw my future self. I didn't want to believe it but I knew it to be true. My personal experiences with people, mainly women, proved a lot of the things we discuss here.I woke up not wanting to go to work, I often had outbursts alone/outside, and I sort of lost my will to live. In June I felt better but I would still have small windows of rage that stemmed from thinking about certain events in my life. I have no idea how I overcame these difficulties, but I did.

Were you guys the same? Feel free to share your experiences.

 

[Gigacel]

I first swallowed the black pill when I was in grade 4 when I literally got picked on for being fat/ugly. I would get made fun of doing something people deemed stupid, but when little Chad did the same thing, everyone clapped and cheered. The black pill was very much part of my childhood and so when I first found out about the incel community, I laughed and laughed until I can’t laugh anymore because of how true it is. Everything that was said coincided with my thoughts that I was having for years.

 

[Gremlincel]

me irl upon learning the truth

 

[Timecel]

It was more of a progressive thing for me

 

[Reprobus]

I already had a feeling things were that way so it wasn't too bad

 

[/pol/cel]

This was my exact reaction when it all clicked in place.

 

[Fullofhate]

It was actually like the five stages of grief.

 

[EyesAreSoCold]

I also completely swallowed the blackpill at r9k somewhere around 2014-2015. It was horrible when I understood it at last, that I haven't been able to get girls and won't get them because of my skeletal flaws, nothing that I could change. I felt great despair and hopelessness, I have hinted that this was the case ever since my early teens but I never fully accepted it until 2015. I manged to cope much with the feeling of despair by reading literature that showed a worldview where all materialism and desires are diminished and deemed unpure and insignificant, but no matter how much I read and search for esoteric inspiration nature always wins, you can't fully cope with being alone.