I've seen many Afghan women with toxic mindsets opposing rapes and forced marriages. Now, I understand getting raped may be uncomfortable at first, but it doesn't entitle you to speaking badly of Taliban or maybe planning terrorism (being mean and needy is also terrorism) against them. Here are some tips to grow up and work to better your situation, instead of complaining and doing literally nothing like an entitled baby.
" let me stop you right here. You won't gain anything by pointing fingers at others, it's time to take responsibility once in your life. No one likes irresponsible women and maybe it's precisely why you were raped. It's your life and you get what you choose. You can't blame others for your bad decisions. I know it may be hard, but in reality you only have yourself to blame for Taliban taking over Kabul and some Taliban fighter raping you. Have you done anything to prevent that? Did you fight in military until your last breath? Maybe you should've committed suicide not to get raped? There are plenty of options and you've chosen this.
Maybe once in your life you should try not to act like a total bitch and smile more or strike a conversation with the fighters. I bet you don't even interact with them that much, so how can you know what they're really like. You just have to act like a normal human and respect them and maybe then they'll respect you back. But remember, you're not entitled to anything, including respect, so if you get abused even more despite your good behavior, just keep trying!
I hope these tips will be helpful. I'm really trying to understand Afghan women and empathize with their situation, but I don't think they need any more coddling. I offer practical solutions and it's up to them whether they'll use them or not. Hope you'll do great in the new regime! Allahu Akbar!
PS Please don't send me any silly "studies" saying rape is bad for mental health or stupid "articles" explaining the sociopolitical situation of Afghanistan. I know Afghan women better than they know themselves, because I saw one on TV this morning. I won't change my opinions, because they're right. I have a lot of real life experiences, while all these Afghan women probably never saw a Taliban fighter irl and just make shit up and you surely misinterpret all these studies.
1. Admit it's your fault
"B-but how is it my fault?! I'm literally being threatened with death and it's the Taliban taking over which caused this which was caused by the US withdrawing its military… blablabla…" let me stop you right here. You won't gain anything by pointing fingers at others, it's time to take responsibility once in your life. No one likes irresponsible women and maybe it's precisely why you were raped. It's your life and you get what you choose. You can't blame others for your bad decisions. I know it may be hard, but in reality you only have yourself to blame for Taliban taking over Kabul and some Taliban fighter raping you. Have you done anything to prevent that? Did you fight in military until your last breath? Maybe you should've committed suicide not to get raped? There are plenty of options and you've chosen this.2. Stop complaining
No one likes people who constantly complain. I'm sure you'd get better treatment if you just shut up and listened. We all have our struggles, but it's not a reason to complain all the time. You may think you have it really bad, but everyone suffers, experiences worse days. You suffer from having sex, but some suffer from not having sex. It’s the classic Buddhism idea of the poor suffering for being poor, but the rich suffering for being rich. Complaining won't change anything, it won't better your situation.3. Seek help
External circumstances don't create suffering, it's all your mindset and thoughts. You can talk about your feelings with your family (if they're alive) or the Taliban fighters. I'm sure they'll understand, but you just have to open up and expose your weaknesses. What really would help you is professional help: talk to a therapist or, more realistically, a religious figure like an imam. He'll help you reframe your negative thoughts and unhelpful thought patterns about this situation. You may see it as being raped by violent extremists, but if you saw it as an opportunity to sacrifice yourself for Allah, you'd be much happier.4. Try being nice
Many Afghan women, who end up raped, hold very negative views about Taliban fighters. Maybe, just maybe if you weren't such pieces of shit, you wouldn't get raped. They call them terrorists, but maybe the real terrorism is the way they talk about their rapists. You have to understand that Taliban fighters are real people with feelings, just like you and me. You can't expect them to treat you nicely if you think about them like that. You may say "I tried to cooperate, but they still abused me!", well, bad personality like this is just immediately noticeable. Getting raped may have hurt, but they were hurt even more when they detected all these negative views you have about them. Maybe once in your life you should try not to act like a total bitch and smile more or strike a conversation with the fighters. I bet you don't even interact with them that much, so how can you know what they're really like. You just have to act like a normal human and respect them and maybe then they'll respect you back. But remember, you're not entitled to anything, including respect, so if you get abused even more despite your good behavior, just keep trying!5. Being free won't make you happy
You have to realize that. Being enslaved, raped and forced to marry a Taliban fighter isn't what makes you unhappy, it's your mindset and you're at fault for that. Even if you were completely free and had a luxurious life, you'd still be miserable, because it's all in your head. There are many people in countries where the Sharia law isn't enforced who are just as sad, if not more, as you. Attending university? Going to the beach with your friends? You will still feel depressed and lonely when it’s over. All those outside things will not give you the satisfaction and happiness you are seeking.I hope these tips will be helpful. I'm really trying to understand Afghan women and empathize with their situation, but I don't think they need any more coddling. I offer practical solutions and it's up to them whether they'll use them or not. Hope you'll do great in the new regime! Allahu Akbar!
PS Please don't send me any silly "studies" saying rape is bad for mental health or stupid "articles" explaining the sociopolitical situation of Afghanistan. I know Afghan women better than they know themselves, because I saw one on TV this morning. I won't change my opinions, because they're right. I have a lot of real life experiences, while all these Afghan women probably never saw a Taliban fighter irl and just make shit up and you surely misinterpret all these studies.
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