You're a plucky young street urchin, living at the Hudson Street Municipal Boys Orphanage with a handful of other ragamuffins. You all are regularly abused and neglected by the orphanage director, child psychoanalyst Dr. Peter "Pizza" B. Hannigan. He never takes you guys to see picture shows or anything fun, so you have to occupy your minds with copes like newspapers, magazines, and FDR's fireside chats.
The news of the world is not good. Apparently Germany went and had itself an election too. This Hitler guy? He's makin' trouble for the Jews. And as a result they're all fleeing to America. And the ones that are here won't go home. They can't, for fear of persecution. So now you have a refugee crisis on your hands. On top of that, you hear Mr. Hannigan talking to his friends about how if Germany starts conquering other parts of Europe, bet yer bottom dollar Americans will support another draft. And by the time it happens, you all will be just old enough to go to war. It's not fair. All you ever asked for was your parentsmatch. And it looks like you're gonna grow up without them.
Most of you are pretty blackpilled about your prospects.
Save for Little Orphan Andy, the curly topped de facto leader of your band of brothers. He insists that your parents, the ones who abandoned you, are out there somewhere, maybe! And if you can bring yourselves to forgive them for abandoning you, you can still salvage a childhood with them. You all just need to somehow find your way out of this orphanage. And scour the country for them if you have to. And one day Andy does just that. He escapes the orphanage. But Mr. Hannigan is furious. And he says you're all complicit in helping Andy escape. "I should've known it! I try to raise you boys proper, but the toxic masculinity in prevalent in American culture nowadays! It's made animals of you all! Why can't you be like little girls??? You don't see them causing trouble!" He turns to Marty, the littlest of the boys and Andy's best friend. He grabs Marty by the shoulders. "Trust me, I've looked at so many little boys just like you, so I know what I'm talking about. You don't have to be this way." He looks around the room. "This is why your parents didn't love you. Your aggressive, patriarchical notions! How long do you think Andy would last out there? Without feminine wisdom to guide him?" Mr. Hannigan releases Marty, and dusts himself off. "The police are out looking for Andy now. And when he gets back, you'll stay up until you've finished your copies of Married Love!"
Mr. Hannigan slams the door as he leaves your room. You all sit in quiet reflection for a while. Then Marty peeps "How about we kill Mr. Hannigan?"
Why not? The other boys seem to be on board. And no one wants to read Married Love again. Death by "hard knocks." You could do this tonight. Are you in or out?
The news of the world is not good. Apparently Germany went and had itself an election too. This Hitler guy? He's makin' trouble for the Jews. And as a result they're all fleeing to America. And the ones that are here won't go home. They can't, for fear of persecution. So now you have a refugee crisis on your hands. On top of that, you hear Mr. Hannigan talking to his friends about how if Germany starts conquering other parts of Europe, bet yer bottom dollar Americans will support another draft. And by the time it happens, you all will be just old enough to go to war. It's not fair. All you ever asked for was your parentsmatch. And it looks like you're gonna grow up without them.
Most of you are pretty blackpilled about your prospects.Save for Little Orphan Andy, the curly topped de facto leader of your band of brothers. He insists that your parents, the ones who abandoned you, are out there somewhere, maybe! And if you can bring yourselves to forgive them for abandoning you, you can still salvage a childhood with them. You all just need to somehow find your way out of this orphanage. And scour the country for them if you have to. And one day Andy does just that. He escapes the orphanage. But Mr. Hannigan is furious. And he says you're all complicit in helping Andy escape. "I should've known it! I try to raise you boys proper, but the toxic masculinity in prevalent in American culture nowadays! It's made animals of you all! Why can't you be like little girls??? You don't see them causing trouble!" He turns to Marty, the littlest of the boys and Andy's best friend. He grabs Marty by the shoulders. "Trust me, I've looked at so many little boys just like you, so I know what I'm talking about. You don't have to be this way." He looks around the room. "This is why your parents didn't love you. Your aggressive, patriarchical notions! How long do you think Andy would last out there? Without feminine wisdom to guide him?" Mr. Hannigan releases Marty, and dusts himself off. "The police are out looking for Andy now. And when he gets back, you'll stay up until you've finished your copies of Married Love!"
Mr. Hannigan slams the door as he leaves your room. You all sit in quiet reflection for a while. Then Marty peeps "How about we kill Mr. Hannigan?"
Why not? The other boys seem to be on board. And no one wants to read Married Love again. Death by "hard knocks." You could do this tonight. Are you in or out?
