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Blackpill My social capability is ruined...

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Because my formative years that were supposed to be spent socializing and developing social skills were spent fighting and fending off bullies.

I went from being directly bullied and physically attacked to being isolated and excluded because I have fought back. Took a lot of detention and suspension in the process.

My fighting skills were honed in high school to the point that when I joined an MMA gym (that also taught kenpo karate), the sensei thought I had previous training because I was able to beat blue belt level or lower fighters on day 1. He told me that some of my movements and reactions were similar to that of an experienced fighter.

Anyway, I'm deer in the headlights in social situations. I can't make friends and properly socially interact with normies even if I tried.

I'm already halfway through my life as I'm 35+

It's over for me socially that's why I'm mentally detached from this world and it made me feel a lot better mentally detaching from this world and hoping for a better afterlife.

I'm not suicidal. I plan to stay here as long as possible to pay off my bad karma so my next life will be better.

I understand that cutting my life short will have serious spiritual consequences in the form of either Hellfire as described by Christians, Muslims, and Jews... or a repeat of my current life in the best case scenario.

Either way that's Hell.

So suicide is totally NOT an option.
 
As a fellow oldcel i think the same. I gave up on talking to people because its like talking to aliens. I cant suicide its totally against my nature, im survivalist im not self destructive. I drag my life on until i die, theres nothing else to do tbh.
 
There are othER possibilities instead of suicide
 
Hang in there brocel
 
My fighting skills were honed in high school to the point that when I joined an MMA gym (that also taught kenpo karate), the sensei thought I had previous training because I was able to beat blue belt level or lower fighters on day 1. He told me that some of my movements and reactions were similar to that of an experienced fighter.
r/iamverybadass
 
Anyway, I'm deer in the headlights in social situations. I can't make friends and properly socially interact with normies even if I tried.
It's always awkward when I go to bars or restaurants with my colleagues. They always have so much to talk about. The majority of the time I just sit there doing nothing and give an occasional smile to show that I'm paying attention. I don't know if I actually deserve all of this just because I don't have the patience to watch all seasons of Star Trek or follow politics.
He told me that some of my movements and reactions were similar to that of an experienced fighter.
Brutal. I'm glad at least I grew up in an environment where contempt never turned into violence.
I'm already halfway through my life as I'm 35+
I'm really sorry to hear that. It's funny how people half of your age are whining about inceldom. I hope you can at least find a good cope so you don't have to be miserable for the second half. I have poor health so hopefully I don't have to suffer as long.
 
It’s [UWSL]funny how people half of your age are whining about inceldom. I hope you can at least find a good cope so you don't have to be miserable for the second half. I have poor health so hopefully I don't have to suffer as long.[/UWSL]
Nice cope, the younger you are the worse it is.
 
As a fellow oldcel i think the same. I gave up on talking to people because its like talking to aliens. I cant suicide its totally against my nature, im survivalist im not self destructive. I drag my life on until i die, theres nothing else to do tbh.
Confirmed.

And, you can survive op!
 
I'm in similar situation as you
 
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