Jfl, same at this point.
My only friend who tolerated me passively because he probably felt obliged to do so after our childhood in a shitty school was the last semblance of normalcy in my life - and I even lost that.
I unironically have mental problems now that would doom every relationship to fail even if I succeeded with fulfilling the demands for minimal looks in the current year, I have no attention span, no frustration tolerance and am easily annoyed/bored. I also hate talking to other people, unironically when you want something done you either do it yourself or shut your mouth while you let others do it for you, but when you pemantly come up with useless suggestions you are only annoyance.
I also doubt that I would be able to perform the demands of someone sexually, especially when she has a body counts in the dozens (like almost all women after leaving high school/college, jfl). Don't even know why people say it as an insult that people fear women like that, it's only natural, because it would be a completely asymmetric relationship in power balance. Furthermore, a relationship is nothing special for someone like that.
I have no subjects where I could talk with others, I have only interests that are deemed boring by most people and watch no TV/read no newspapers (half a decade ago was the last time I really consumed newspapers/anything on TV that wasn't a work of fiction or a documentary about Nazis/animals/criminality). As I once talked with an autistic girl who had the same interests (certain animals) like me even she said that I was too obsessed with them and that I should get a life that doesn't consist out of watching some movies/documentaries each night and then going to work. Jfl, a meme disease in women.
I also cannot talk about politics with most people, because I am not interested in modern politics and most of my ideologies were meme ideologies that most people either don't know or despise (between Libertarianism and Strasserism). I also play no video games and listen to film/military music most of the time, I also don't read books. It's over.