Venting Mother told me that women focus very much on a man's "career"... and says the amount of time I work will influence my chances .....

[SupremeAllah]

For sure, no doubt about it. Almost always.

I'm an exception – in my case my parents always knew it was over. I'm 27, short (5'4), and very ugly. My parents have implied several times over the years that they don't think I will have a gf, I inferred it from the things they said and didn't say.

In the case I described in the post, my mother also doesn't think this will get me a gf. But she wants me to have a "good" job and work 100%/full-time. I strongly suspect she then hopes that I'll forget about a gf as I get older.

Brutal

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Don’t burn yourself out with work. Do a part time job if you have to

I agree. I'm studying college part-time, 100% online/from home, and don't have a job. I have extreme social anxiety and I'm already struggling.

But even if I work like 80 or 90% (in German speaking countries "100%" = 40 hrs) my parents said they want the money back they gifted me for my savings account.

They know and always knew I can't get a gf.

My father cares much less but my mother wants me to get a job and from everything she said and didn't say I can infer that she doesn't think I can get a gf. But she basically says "good job and work = gf", not because she thinks this (or anything) will get me a gf but bc she wants me to have a good job. (she doesn't want money from me once I have a job. But I'll never have a good job.)

 

[VideoGameCoper]

I agree. I'm studying college part-time, 100% online/from home, and don't have a job. I have extreme social anxiety and I'm already struggling.

But even if I work like 80 or 90% (in German speaking countries "100%" = 40 hrs) my parents said they want the money back they gifted me for my savings account.

They know and always knew I can't get a gf.

My father cares much less but my mother wants me to get a job and from everything she said and didn't say I can infer that she doesn't think I can get a gf. But she basically says "good job and work = gf", not because she thinks this (or anything) will get me a gf but bc she wants me to have a good job. (she doesn't want money from me once I have a job. But I'll never have a good job.)

Brutal. Doing college sucks. Working as brutally hard as they want you to is cope

 

[Da_Yunez]

• her and I both know, I have no chance. But that's not my point. In front of her, I pretend like I think I can get a gf — reason being, she desperately wants to talk me out of it (because she knows I can't get one anyway).
in the past she always mentioned how relationships are overrated and how you can be happy without one. she means well I guess, because as I said: she doesn't think I can get one anyway.

• she doesn't admit it but she wants me to work full-time in the future (but she doesn't want any money from me), and I strongly suspect she thinks I'll be too busy with my job to think about wanting, or desiring a gf.

• she says how I have no ambition, no drive (100% implied: career-wise).

• my dad is even worse when it comes to telling me to do "coping". this is just the most recent example.

Just Betabux theory

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Brutal. Doing college sucks. Working as brutally hard as they want you to is cope

Yup I agree. I'm not struggling financially but mentally btw.

And I'm almost always home. Studying online > studying in person, for me at least. I really don't see a way how I can cope, as I'm already getting treated differently bc of my face

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Just Betabux theory

Not that I can get any gf but I have my standards too. Sounds cocky but can't help it.
And she doesn't actually believe it can get me a gf. She just wants me to get a job and says this "the better the job = more chances to get gf". She doesn't actually believe it.

 

[Da_Yunez]

I meant she literally knows I can't get a gf, and tries to mention the disadvantages of having a gf. She also thinks and hopes I'll be happy without a gf, and thinks that is possible. She has always said this, most of the time indirectly.

Just cope until you die theory. (you cant even cope since youre a broke wagie.)

 

[Da_Yunez]

Not that I can get any gf but I have my standards too. Sounds cocky but can't help it.
And she doesn't actually believe it can get me a gf. She just wants me to get a job and says this "the better the job = more chances to get gf". She doesn't actually believe it.

the better your chances to be a cuck locked in a loveless and sexless marriage.

 

[VideoGameCoper]

Yup I agree. I'm not struggling financially but mentally btw.

And I'm almost always home. Studying online > studying in person, for me at least. I really don't see a way how I can cope, as I'm already getting treated differently bc of my face

I wouldn’t be able to stand doing college like that. Too much work for my liking

 

[TheGrayWolf]

I wouldn’t be able to stand doing college like that. Too much work for my liking

Fair enough, it's not for everyone for sure. It's part time degree and even then I procrastinate a lot kek

 

[VideoGameCoper]

Fair enough, it's not for everyone for sure. It's part time degree and even then I procrastinate a lot kek

Hope it goes well

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Hope it goes well

Thanks man

 

[VideoGameCoper]

Thanks man

Np

 

[yourbod_ymychoicel]

i think you should ascend with your mom, "if she really cares that much about you".

 

[TheGrayWolf]

i think you should ascend with your mom, "if she really cares that much about you".

Was soll’n des? Net lustig. I ignorier di mol