My life has always been bland to say the least. Living as a khhv is hard my life hasnt been the best as i usually spend my days in bed scrolling and rarely getting up. Its gotten to the point my only contact with the outside is when i open the window for fresh air or the moonlight at night. I always sit and wonder staring at the ceiling what did i do to deserve this? I havent hurt anyone i havent been mean to anyone i havent done anything wrong yet im always seen as a demon just becuse of my looks. To pour salt in the wound my parents are fucking chadlite and stacylite and yet i look like shit. All they say is the same normie retoric about "being confident". Ive contemplated ending it multiple times but i havent been able to go through with it. All i can do is sit and ponder why must i suffer so much when ive done nothing wrong to deserve such inhuman treatment from society. Ever since i started schooling my life has been shit and a hellhole that burns hotter eachday and whenever it reaches the boiling point all i do is chimp out like a nt and only end up harming myself but not enough to end it all. Whenever i wake up i just realize i have to go through the same motion again a loop of constant struggle and shit that feels like a humiliation ritual on blast that dosent seem to ever end no matter how much i try to distance myself from the outside world. All i do is hope to get to friday to stop the shitty college life that i didnt even choose it was placed upon me by my family becuse apparently to them being smart is more important than looks but of course when youre nt and chadlite its easy for you to say that. I just wish i could finally gain the courage to end it all. A shotgun blast to the temple that would finally put an end to this despicable and horrid cycle of a pathetic worthless life that i lead. All i feel is sadness then rage then sadness then rage again. Its all just a shitty clusterfuck that loops on end like a garbage movie you always see on cable tv.
All i can do now is just sink further and hope to one day get the courage to rope.
All i can do now is just sink further and hope to one day get the courage to rope.
