Venting Just found a condom under my keyboard

[Deleted member 1983]

They have false hope for you. It's nice but sad at the same time.

 

[_incelinside]

Wtf, honestly, what the fuck.

Why would my parents put it there?
Like I never brought a woman home, fuck I never even kissed a female, what the fuck would I need a condom for? I never even bought condoms for myself.
They literally put it under my keyboard for me to find, they know I would find it since I am on my computer during every single spare minute I get.
Fuck me they really have high expectations of me if they think I'll use it before the 2025 expiry date.
Fuck I literally spent £50 on lego's just hours ago, and now this? I am not ready for this shit.

Why would they do this? Do they want me to bring a girl home or something? Are they mocking me (I'm not bad looking so idk)?
Fuck, that put unnecessary pressure on me. I just hope I don't find an entire box stashed somewhere.

LMFAOO NIGGA IT'S OVER

 

[RREEEEEEEEE]

for reals

JFL.

Why is it disgusting lol?
I literally just hold the tip of my foreskin when cumming, literally avoiding all skin on semen contact except the foreskin ofc.

Mmmohmmmygoooooooddddd. Also JFL, I love your usertitle, kek.

 

[gstvtrp]

You should leave it there like you never found it.

 

[Juxtaposition6]

Take it as an indirect insult.

 

[Tuttle]

For some reason I assumed from the title you meant "used" condom. Then I read this and it got funnier:

>Why would my parents put it there?

 

[Bushladen008]

They know you're a retard.

 

[southeastcel]

So you can jerk off with out cumming all over the place. Your mom is probably tired of washing all your crusty sheets and socks lol

^

Anyone who says they masturbate over 0 times a year while living with their parents is a gigantic liar

 

[jackbud]

What lol? A condom? I dunno how I'd react to that

 

[demonanus]

GO ER!

 

[VST]

LMFAOO NIGGA IT'S OVER

Fuck you nigga, legos are a top tier cope.

 

[_incelinside]

Fuck you nigga, legos are a top tier cope.

I agree with that

 

[VST]

You should leave it there like you never found it.

I already threw it behind my desk somewhere, I cringe just thinking about that condom for some reason.

 

[jackbud]

I already threw it behind my desk somewhere, I cringe just thinking about that condom for some reason.

Behind your desk? throw it in the trash lmao