SuicideFuel In a few hours I have a long-lasting appointment in a busy city/building I'm forced to go to

[TheGrayWolf]

normies will stare, laugh, talk about me, eye me...... it will be very uncomfortable for me, I always wanna be invisible.......so brutal I'm so nervous even now and can't cope..................

 

[copemaxx9002]

normies will stare, laugh, talk about me, eye me...... it will be very uncomfortable for me, I always wanna be invisible.......so brutal I'm so nervous even now and can't cope..................

i fucking hate it when shit like this interupts my rotting. sorry.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

i fucking hate it when shit like this interupts my rotting. sorry.

thanks. yea bc i'm so strange/abnormal looking everyone (male, female, young, old) reacts to me in some way (stare; or joke or talk about me with the person they are with), it saddens me and makes me feel fucking uncomfortable. humans are evil bullying very ugly/deformed people like me

 

[copemaxx9002]

thanks. yea bc i'm so strange/abnormal looking everyone (male, female, young, old) reacts to me in some way (stare; or joke or talk about me with the person they are with), it saddens me and makes me feel fucking uncomfortable. humans are evil bullying very ugly/deformed people like me

im sorry to hear that man.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

im sorry to hear that man.

thanks for understanding bro

 

[TheGrayWolf]

this will be a living nightmare

 

[Robb97]

In situations like these I take drugs/medication such that I don't care as much. The best combination I've found in my case was vyanse and lyrica.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

In situations like these I take drugs/medication such that I don't care as much. The best combination I've found in my case was vyanse and lyrica.

nice.. I'm on two meds, high dose (one for adhd other for anxiety) but still I feel very uncomfortable and sad being the centre of attention they don't really work in my case

 

[TheGrayWolf]

this will be a living nightmare for me...I have this recurring dream in different settings (I've never been to or seen before) where everyone who walks my way stares, jokes, etc. about me.....but it's also reality, not me being paranoid or smth

 

[light]

bro im really sorry, i hope you treat yourself to your best copes when youre home and ldaring again, good luck

 

[TheGrayWolf]

bro im really sorry, i hope you treat yourself to your best copes when youre home and ldaring again, good luck

thanks bro appreciate it, i hope to continue a movie or series i'm watching and eat something sweet (the horror will start in about 90 mins and it will all be over in like 5-7 hrs)

 

[light]

thanks bro appreciate it, i hope to continue a movie or series i'm watching and eat something sweet (the horror will start in about 90 mins and it will all be over in like 5-7 hrs)

that sounds really nice, 5-7 hours sounds really gruelling tbh, its probably gonna be pretty hard but you got this bro

 

[TheGrayWolf]

that sounds really nice, 5-7 hours sounds really gruelling tbh, its probably gonna be pretty hard but you got this bro

thanks man, that's nice of you (it's with my AH dad - who btw is a tall chad but it's his fault I'm short and ugly, he gave me an unknown bad gene he carries - first go to a car-museum then walk to eat dinner)

 

[TheGrayWolf]

- small kid said "he looks funny"
- many people stared or pointed at me
- old people (in restaurant) and a group of tourists joked about my face, pointing and laughing, with no regard that I may overhear. But sure....he's deformed and look different so let's make fun of him, he's nothing.

I know it's "only" words and stares but they're still hurtful AF. The disrespect. The implications this has (never will have a gf, will always be reduced to my face)

 

[TheGrayWolf]

@benzocel - sorry for bothering you but I wrote an update I felt the need to share/vent. It went as expected, of course. A special looking, very strange looking guy is there and people have to stare, make comments (to the other person they're with), joke etc..... why is this world so cruel???

 

[Robb97]

- small kid said "he looks funny"
- many people stared or pointed at me
- old people (in restaurant) and a group of tourists joked about my face, with no regard that I may overhear. But sure....he's deformed and look different so let's make fun of him, he's nothing.

I know it's "only" words and stares but they're still hurtful AF. The disrespect. The implications this has (never will have a gf, will always be reduced to my face)

Brutal, I feel you.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Brutal, I feel you.

yup it's brutal indeed. The moment it happens is very stinging and humiliating. My skull and head are medically deformed, ok, look at me and move on. But no no, everyone has to react somehow.

 

[light]

@benzocel - sorry for bothering you but I wrote an update I felt the need to share/vent. It went as expected, of course. A special looking, very strange looking guy is there and people have to stare, make comments (to the other person they're with), joke etc..... why is this world so cruel???

you arent bothering me in the least bro, and im sorry it had to turn out that way . i hope you’re not being too hard on yourself though, i know its hard to not hate yourself but our genetics arent our fault bro. you didnt choose any of this shit, none of this is your fault. and the world is cruel indeed man and everyone is an evil cunt, looking to spit down upon anyone they see as being inferior so they can feel better about themselves .

our copes are all we have in this world bro honestly, treat yourself to something good now that this ordeal is over bro

 

[light]

know it's "only" words and stares but they're still hurtful AF.

this shit “only” being words is how they gaslight us into being docile our situation - im nowhere exposed to this on the same level as you - but people in my college mimic the way i say things and laughing about it among themselves and they do it in front of my face - im autistic and i say things in a weird way - because of this happening countless times im basically mute at this point and don’t speak unless spoken to also i get ptsd whenever i hear people laughing in my vicinity because of my past experiences its really brutal

 

[kay']

Mission complete, well done soldier!

 

[Incline]

nice.. I'm on two meds, high dose (one for adhd other for anxiety) but still I feel very uncomfortable and sad being the centre of attention they don't really work in my case

Try phenibut

 

[TheGrayWolf]

you arent bothering me in the least bro, and im sorry it had to turn out that way . i hope you’re not being too hard on yourself though, i know its hard to not hate yourself but our genetics arent our fault bro. you didnt choose any of this shit, none of this is your fault. and the world is cruel indeed man and everyone is an evil cunt, looking to spit down upon anyone they see as being inferior so they can feel better about themselves .

our copes are all we have in this world bro honestly, treat yourself to something good now that this ordeal is over bro

this shit “only” being words is how they gaslight us into being docile our situation - im nowhere exposed to this on the same level as you - but people in my college mimic the way i say things and laughing about it among themselves and they do it in front of my face -

thank you brother, much appreciated!

im autistic and i say things in a weird way - because of this happening countless times im basically mute at this point and don’t speak unless spoken to also i get ptsd whenever i hear people laughing in my vicinity because of my past experiences its really brutal

i'm sorry for you too man, I understand

 

[Mistake]

- small kid said "he looks funny"
- many people stared or pointed at me
- old people (in restaurant) and a group of tourists joked about my face, pointing and laughing, with no regard that I may overhear. But sure....he's deformed and look different so let's make fun of him, he's nothing.

I know it's "only" words and stares but they're still hurtful AF. The disrespect. The implications this has (never will have a gf, will always be reduced to my face)

Sorry brocel, I feel your pain

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Sorry brocel, I feel your pain
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Thanks bro and I'm sorry you're going through this shit too
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