I'm a disabledcel, ricecel, spergcel, shortcel, braincel, and poorcel all at once. AMA

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Divergent_Integral

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Hello all,

I've been lurking this awesome (if thoroughly depressing) forum for a while now, and have finally decided to become a member.

I'm a 36-year-old male who lives in North-Western Europe. As the title of my post indicates, I've kinda hit the incel jackpot in the lottery called life.

My country of origin is South Korea. My biological parents for some reason decided to put me up for adoption when I was one year of age. I know nothing about them, not even their names.

Anyway, I was adopted by a white European couple who couldn't have children of their own. Unfortunately, the country into which I was adopted is home to just about the tallest men on this planet. So at 5'3" (160 cm) I now stand a full 8 inches shorter than my average male compatriot.

At age four I was diagnosed with cerebral palsy and extreme myopia. To save you a lengthy description of cerebral palsy, let's just say that my mannerisms are more or less those of Jeff in the video below. (Though, unfortunately, my facial structure is less masculine than Jeff's.)

In addition to cerebral palsy, I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome as a young adult. (This disorder has since been merged into Autism Spectrum Disorder.) My IQ was measured at 134 (SD = 15). I'm not very happy with being that intelligent. My IQ is sufficiently high for me to fully realize how screwed I am, and also to alienate me from most people. At the same time, it isn't quite high enough for me to be able to pour myself into Newton- or Tesla-level intellectual copes.

Due to personal issues (some of them related to my chronic datelessness), I flunked out of university. As a result, I am now unemployed, surviving on a meager social security pension.

Though my life generally isn't too bad (with a sufficient amount of copes and distractions), sometimes the utter hopelessness of my situation hits me like a ton of bricks. Some of you bandy about the phrase "it's over". Well, for me it never actually began. Starting at age twelve, I tried asking girls out, writing them love letters, chatting them up, etc. My rejections number in the hundreds, not even counting the foids who didn't bother to reply. It was all doomed from the start; I see that all too clearly now.

Anyway, thanks for reading this lengthy first post of mine. If you have any questions, I will try to answer those.

 
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PPEcel

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What instruments do you play?

Fellow ricecel here.
 
omnilet

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>ricecel
thats enough man, its brutal.
 
Napoléoncel

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AMA? Jfl, we dont do that here buddy boyo. This aint reddit. But still, it must be very hard for you, my condolences to you brocel.
 
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riceronicel

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Brutal. I'm 36 years old ricecel too. Fucking hell I thought my life sucked balls. I am 5'4 and I'll tell you it's not better than being 5'3
 
DepravedAndDeprived

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RedIce

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I haven't heard of many cases of adopted incels. If you don't mind me asking, how are/were you treated by your adoptive parents?
 
DepravedAndDeprived

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Napoléoncel said:
AMA? Jfl, we dont do that here buddy boyo. This aint reddit.
Fuck you. He celmogs you into the grave. This AMA should stay.

OP are you in a disabled community of sorts?
 
Divergent_Integral

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PPEcel said:
What instruments do you play?

Fellow ricecel here.

None. It's impossible due to my cerebral palsy, which causes hand tremors. But I do like to compose music on my computer. Notation software these days can provide tolerable playback, if you're willing to tweak the midi output.
 
metabuxx

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utterly brutal man. I can't believe life can be so cruel on some of us.
 
TheBasedCel

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School must of been a breeze though ricecel + boosted IQ by aspergers, no idea how you maneged to leave uni.
 
DepravedAndDeprived

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Divergent_Integral said:
None. It's impossible due to my cerebral palsy, which causes hand tremors. But I do like to compose music on my computer. Notation software these days can provide tolerable playback, if you're willing to tweak the midi output.
How severe is your CP? What are ways in which it impacts your life that other people wouldn't typically think of?
 
EeEcel

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Arent there state mandated hookers for dicabledcels in the netherlands?
 
Napoléoncel

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DepravedAndDeprived said:
Fuck you. He celmogs you into the grave. This AMA should stay.

OP are you in a disabled community of sorts?
The fuck , celmogging xD You think this is some dick measuring contest you retard
 
D

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Ricecel is nas enough but you rlly hit the jackpot,my condolences.
 
PPEcel

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DepravedAndDeprived said:
Fuck you. He celmogs you into the grave. This AMA should stay.

+1

Divergent_Integral said:
None. It's impossible due to my cerebral palsy, which causes hand tremors. But I do like to compose music on my computer. Notation software these days can provide tolerable playback, if you're willing to tweak the midi output.

Ah. I thought you were a stereotypical string-instrument-playing ricecel.

Another question for you, OP: I assume you live in a country where prostitution is legal. Have you tried visiting an escort? If not, why not? If so, how was your experience?
 
DepravedAndDeprived

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EeEcel said:
Arent there state mandated hookers for dicabledcels in the netherlands?
No, but unironically I know that nursing homes sometimes have arrangements with prostitutes who can be hired to "entertain" lonely elderly men.
 
Divergent_Integral

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DepravedAndDeprived said:
Fuck you. He celmogs you into the grave. This AMA should stay.

OP are you in a disabled community of sorts?

Thanks! Yeah, I mingle with other cripples on occasion. The vast majority of them are bluepill normies though, still dreaming of that special foid who can "look past their disabilities". You'd think life would beat some sense into them, but nope. I tried blackpilling the more rational among my crip friends, with varying degrees of failure. Now I mostly avoid incel topics completely.
 
Divergent_Integral

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PPEcel said:
+1



Ah. I thought you were a stereotypical string-instrument-playing ricecel.

Another question for you, OP: I assume you live in a country where prostitution is legal. Have you tried visiting an escort? If not, why not? If so, how was your experience?

You are correct in assuming that. I have tried hookers, but it didn't work for me. It isn't sex per se that I want out of life, but genuine heart-to-heart, soul-to-soul affection. Which is something that no prostitute can provide at any price.
 
pp183

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fak. brutal story

SushiKatSenpai @SushiKatSenpai is an adopted koreacel too
 
D

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Your avi reminds me of a violin. Do you play any instruments? How are you coping these days? Ever thought about Suicide?
 
PPEcel

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Divergent_Integral said:
You are correct in assuming that. I have tried hookers, but it didn't work for me. It isn't sex per se that I want out of life, but genuine heart-to-heart, soul-to-soul affection. Which is something that no prostitute can provide at any price.

True, I totally understand that sentiment. To me, it's just a really expensive drug.

But how did hookers treat you? Do you have a certain preference?
 
Divergent_Integral

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RedIce said:
I haven't heard of many cases of adopted incels. If you don't mind me asking, how are/were you treated by your adoptive parents?

Not too badly. They tried their best. But because of our vast IQ difference, my parents (who are slightly below-average normies) and I were never really intimate. Also, my father became an alcoholic later in life.
 
shii410

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welcome to the forum, I always enjoy these graycel lore posts
 
Divergent_Integral

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PPEcel said:
True, I totally understand that sentiment. To me, it's just a really expensive drug.

But how did hookers treat you? Do you have a certain preference?

Most of them were actually very nice to me, going to some lengths to put me at ease. All the same, I couldn't unsee the essential fakeness and hollowness of their attention towards me.

I much prefer the girl-next-door look over the porn star aesthetic.
 
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You're kinda doxxing yourself but I guess you don't really care.

Well, I hope you can find some easy and cushy way to make enough money to create a comfortable lifestyle for yourself. If you can't do it with your IQ, nobody can.

Good luck, I hope life becomes easy and comfortable for you.
 
Divergent_Integral

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Grothendieck said:
Your avi reminds me of a violin. Do you play any instruments? How are you coping these days? Ever thought about Suicide?

For the first question, see my first reply to PPEcel. I'm a computer composer basically.

As for suicide, yes, I've considered it many times. But there always seemed to be some reason to continue living. Nice music, for example. I greatly fear the day when all my copes will have become stale. Then there's nothing left but the rope.
 
Deleted member 19116

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It's a cruel joke to give Asian boys away for adoption in white countries. My sympathies, brocel.
 
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Divergent_Integral said:
For the first question, see my first reply to PPEcel. I'm a computer composer basically.

As for suicide, yes, I've considered it many times. But there always seemed to be some reason to continue living. Nice music, for example. I greatly fear the day when all my copes will have become stale. Then there's nothing left but the rope.
Are you interested in Mathematics?
 
Daydreamincel

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Divergent_Integral

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Grothendieck said:
Are you interested in Mathematics?

Yes, in fact I studied it in university. Though I must admit that I never quite got to the really fun parts where your "nickname hero" did so much interesting work. I was more into the hard analysis subjects, such as non-linear differential equations. Other interests include: foundations & recursion theory, and the more "ad hoc" style of number theory, as practiced by Paul Erdös and others.
 
Iwanttolive

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When did u find out abt blackpill?
 
DepravedAndDeprived

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Divergent_Integral said:
Thanks! Yeah, I mingle with other cripples on occasion. The vast majority of them are bluepill normies though, still dreaming of that special foid who can "look past their disabilities". You'd think life would beat some sense into them, but nope. I tried blackpilling the more rational among my crip friends, with varying degrees of failure. Now I mostly avoid incel topics completely.
Are there no cutiepie CP girls around?
 
Hate_my_life

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What if you're the only one with consciousness and everything else you see is a creation from your mind?
 
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Even the rope would reject you, it's truly over.
 
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welcome bro
 
The Abyss

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Why does this read like a reddit post, don't bring that style here.
 
Divergent_Integral

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DepravedAndDeprived said:
Are there no cutiepie CP girls around?

Sure there are. But guess what? They're after chad as well! (And I know several that actually bagged him.)
Iwanttolive said:
When did u find out abt blackpill?

Gradually on my own. I believe I first heard the term explicitly on Stardusk's channel.
 
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I feel for you mate. Welcome to the forum, hope you feel welcome here.
 
IncelKing

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i might not have a PhD in evolutionary biology, but based on my calculations:

It's OVER
 
Divergent_Integral

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Hate_my_life said:
What if you're the only one with consciousness and everything else you see is a creation from your mind?

I don't have the level of perverted humor that an omnipotent conscious being would need in order to come up with my life.
 
AnonAutist

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TheBasedCel said:
School must of been a breeze though ricecel + boosted IQ by aspergers, no idea how you maneged to leave uni.

Yeah this. With 130+ IQ a (Dutch?) uni should have been easy, high school a complete cake walk. Why isn't OP moneymaxxing to buy superior copes by coding from home or something? He has the 'tism, the IQ, East Asian conscientiousness and a physical disability to keep him in a chair? Recipe for an elite coder - FANG engineering departments are full of them.
 
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epillepsy

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Divergent_Integral said:
My country of origin is South Korea. My biological parents for some reason decided to put me up for adoption when I was one year of age. I know nothing about them, not even their names.

Perhaps they noticed your cerebral palsy, even before you were diagnosed with it, and that's why they gave you up for adoption. Probably for the better, tbh.

You have a very high IQ -- genius level, I believe.

I am also Korean (35, between 5'5 and 5'6). I'm not aware of any other Korean incels here, so it's nice to see you.

Welcome, fellow gookcel.
 
Gyros_Pretcel

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Germany by chance? Sounds like netherlands after reading Brutal man. I am also a healthcel, but by no means as severe.
 
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Transcended Trucel

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brutal as fuck. I am 5'5 and life is horrible. can't imagine how bad it is with CP.


Do you play games? How is your performance in em?
 
BlackpilledTruecel

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I hate girls
 
A

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Have you ever had a job? (I haven't)

How can you have friends if you are autistic? (Can you do this?: https://incels.is/threads/can-you-d...y-and-tell-your-score-in-the-comments.219445/)

My IQ is totally different depending on the measured thing. Visual short-term memory? I'm retard there, way under 2 SD below average. I REALLY struggled in the school dance lessons. Simply could not memorise and mimic the moves that the teacher showed. Is your IQ high in all the measured things, say, in WAIS-IV tests?

So have you passed the MENSA test? Are you a member?

What was the age that you went first time to have paid sex? (I haven't had even that ever, never seen (non-relative) pussy live in my life)

"a meager social security pension"

Is it bigger because you had job(s) in the past? Probably (significantly) more than my absolute minimum disability pension (which is better though compared to my situation before when I was over a decade unemployed straight and got even less money). And the VAT is higher here than in the Netherlands.

Are you on a wheelchair?

I'd take your condition over mine, you have things better than me apart from cerebral palsy (+ I'm 169 cm). You have totally fine face?

Also, prostitution in the Netherlands/North-West Germany is at least half the price cheaper than here (on this website is at least one member in North Rhine-Westphalia that paid 100-120 euros per hour, while here the standard cheapest price is 250 euros an hour). You got brothels also?
 
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Divergent_Integral said:
It isn't sex per se that I want out of life, but genuine heart-to-heart, soul-to-soul affection. Which is something that no prostitute can provide at any price.

"Men only want one thing and its disgusting."

I am sorry op. Hope you stick around the forum.

 

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