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For me, I would say I started to have suspicions my dad was a loser when I was in highschool. By college, I knew for sure my dad was a loser once I had enough life experience to understand who he was or why he always behaved the way he did.
Curious to hear your experiences.
Compared to me, my dad was a relative Chadlite for most of his life before "settling" down. He has always had some weird or odd tendencies but due to being from a small rural town they never stuck out apparently and it was fine for him. By his looks he mogged my mom back in the day. He was a star player on his football team and could get mostly any girl he wanted. He even had bragged in a few stories about bullying some kids.
He had a very privileged life and this is obvious, but he would never admit that to anyone. Unfortunately for me the family wealth and family business basically died by the time I came around so there's nothing left for me to get. Not that I expected anything or feel entitled, but it's funny how much they squandered what they had.
My mom was around normie or Becky-tier from what I know. She lead a decently less privileged life than my dad did but as a woman she clearly had a much higher social standing than I ever have had. But if you want to get down to brass tacks, yes my father "married down" economically, socially, physically, genetically, etc. Especially considering most of my poor genetic traits have come from my mother's side of the family. Such as early onset alzheimers, balding, shorter height, grey hair, etc.
Not like any of that shit mattered for me because my parents did not really take that much of an interest in my life unless it was to punish or admonish me. It feels like they were present only for the bad parts of my life and were horrible at positive reinforcement to the point that when they try it now it just feels insincere. They only tried to pester me with inane bullshit but rarely gave actual guidance or ever took my opinion into account. I was never allowed to grow up or be a man, and I was never allowed to be taught how to do so. They just expected it to magically happen once I turned 18, that somehow I would end up with a house and a job and a gf.
At some point they must have realized I was a lost cause and from then kn they just did the bare minimum of parenting. I think this happened right after I turned 18 and their wishes for me didn't come true.
Granted I am thankful for what I have and what I've been given, as it is much more than many in the world can say. And I will always appreciate that aspect of it and that part of being cared for. I am glad that I didn't have to grow up in dirt-clenchinh poverty and that I had certain privileges. But I will not forget what I was not given and what I was denied.