How much of a factor did luck and randomness play in all of this?

[goop]

Compared to my dad who was in college and married at my age I'm a NEET. I can't see myself getting a high-paying job and having a family like him. Even my siblings are moving forward in life by getting their education or moved out already. Without the right looks, IQ, and personality traits I don't think its possible for me to be more well-adapted to function in society like them. Others in similar or even much worse conditions to myself have managed to succeed meanwhile I failed in all avenues of life.

 

[AutistSupremacist]

Same. My parents already had children at my age. Life is deternined entirely by luck

 

[Animecel2D]

It all comes down to luck and randomness. No one chooses their parents, no one chooses their genes, no one chooses the time period you are born in

everything is determined by factors outside of your control

 

[VanGobbel]

Your dad grew up in a different time. It's only gotten worse and harder for men since then.

 

[AtrociousCitizen]

It all comes down to luck and randomness. No one chooses their parents, no one chooses their genes, no one chooses the time period you are born in

everything is determined by factors outside of your control

It's so sad how little is in your control.

 

[Diddy]

The odds of you being born is 1 in 400 trillion. I'd say luck does play a role.

 

[AtrociousCitizen]

Compared to my dad who was in college and married at my age I'm a NEET. I can't see myself getting a high-paying job and having a family like him. Even my siblings are moving forward in life by getting their education or moved out already. Without the right looks, IQ, and personality traits I don't think its possible for me to be more well-adapted to function in society like them. Others in similar or even much worse conditions to myself have managed to succeed meanwhile I failed in all avenues of life.

I am in a somewhat similar situation to you from what I can tell, and I can attest it's a result of subpar genetic recombination, poor parenting, and generally having horrible circumstances in life.

 

[Icarus]

The odds of you being born is 1 in 400 trillion. I'd say luck does play a role.

Then that makes me one of the most unlucky people possible. Imagine only being given one life, and this is it.

Forced into involuntary loneliness. Wageslaving for a shit job. No friends irl.

I would have gladly took the option to have never been born.

 

[AtrociousCitizen]

Then that makes me one of the most unlucky people possible. Imagine only being given one life, and this is it.

Forced into involuntary loneliness. Wageslaving for a shit job. No friends irl.

It's a cosmic joke

 

[Solid State]

My parents were quite fortunate and intelligent.

Unfortunately, genetic recombination really fucked my mind over as I did well in school but I have a severe psychiatric illness to the point where I have needed medication to function since I was a small child, and neither of my parents have it, so some nasty alleles must have been hiding in their genes somewhere for me to get stuck with being fucked in the head.

 

[PersonalityChad]

It all comes down to luck and randomness. No one chooses their parents, no one chooses their genes, no one chooses the time period you are born in

everything is determined by factors outside of your control

This. The luckpill is the ultimate blackpill

 

[Icarus]

It's a cosmic joke

It just sucks man

 

[goop]

I am in a somewhat similar situation to you from what I can tell, and I can attest it's a result of subpar genetic recombination, poor parenting, and generally having horrible circumstances in life.

It's really hard to come to terms with it all. All of this feels like its my fault for not living up to their standards but I just can't.

 

[Ambatukam Alone]

It all comes down to luck and randomness. No one chooses their parents, no one chooses their genes, no one chooses the time period you are born in

everything is determined by factors outside of your control

This may be sort of true (depending on definitions), and the choices we did make can be traced back to such factors, to some extent, via what sort of person we ended up being when the choice was made. But I believe we should focus on the present and future, which we do have some amount of influence over; whilst still learning from the past without beating ourselves up unnecessarily.

 

[goop]

My parents were quite fortunate and intelligent.

Unfortunately, genetic recombination really fucked my mind over as I did well in school but I have a severe psychiatric illness to the point where I have needed medication to function since I was a small child, and neither of my parents have it, so some nasty alleles must have been hiding in their genes somewhere for me to get stuck with being fucked in the head.

Impressive how you still managed to perform well academically despite overcoming severe mental hurdles. How are you doing career wise with such a condition? I, too, wonder what went wrong in my genes that lead me being a failure despite having fortunate circumstances.

 

[goop]

Your dad grew up in a different time. It's only gotten worse and harder for men since then.

I agree with you but personality wise and cognitively I'm a worse version of him. He would still fare better if he was my age today then me currently. There is no way that I could get a STEM degree, an advanced degree, and hold down a demanding job.

 

[Solid State]

Impressive how you still managed to perform well academically despite overcoming severe mental hurdles. How are you doing career wise with such a condition? I, too, wonder what went wrong in my genes that lead me being a failure despite having fortunate circumstances.

I work in a corporate job in a corner office away from most other employees as I am practically a one-man department.

I take a rather high prescribed dose of Paxil, which keeps my dermatillomanic relapses at bay as it "numbs" my emotional responses to things quite a bit and I also know when to recognize the signs of a relapse coming on to remove myself away from people in the area.

High school was fucked, though, as the school forced me to have an aide follow me around at all times to keep me in line-of-sight on school grounds. This was because I had a severe episode one month into my freshman year that landed me in a mental hospital for three days. After I got out, the principal said that while what happened was not intentional on my part, he still felt that I was a potential danger to other students so it was either have an aide to serve as a "minder" or enroll in another school.

 

[goop]

This may be sort of true (depending on definitions), and the choices we did make can be traced back to such factors, to some extent, via what sort of person we ended up being when the choice was made. But I believe we should focus on the present and future, which we do have some amount of influence over; whilst still learning from the past without beating ourselves up unnecessarily.

A more rational approach to life than my own. Thank you for the thoughtful response.

 

[goop]

I work in a corporate job in a corner office away from most other employees as I am practically a one-man department.

Sounds ideal. Was it a niche role that is hard to get? Do you find it to be stressful as the whole department's responsibilities fall on just you?

I take a rather high prescribed dose of Paxil, which keeps my dermatillomanic relapses at bay as it "numbs" my emotional responses to things quite a bit and I also know when to recognize the signs of a relapse coming on to remove myself away from people in the area.

High school was fucked, though, as the school forced me to have an aide follow me around at all times to keep me in line-of-sight on school grounds. This was because I had a severe episode one month into my freshman year that landed me in a mental hospital for three days. After I got out, the principal said that while what happened was not intentional on my part, he still felt that I was a potential danger to other students so it was either have an aide to serve as a "minder" or enroll in another school.

That must have hampered your entire high school experience in so many ways. Nobody else in your family suffers from this condition but you? Must have felt extremely isolating to manage it day-to-day with the aide making you stand out.

 

[goop]

This. The luckpill is the ultimate blackpill

Jeremy Meeks is the walking personification of the BP.

 

[Solid State]

Sounds ideal. Was it a niche role that is hard to get? Do you find it to be stressful as the whole department's responsibilities fall on just you?

That must have hampered your entire high school experience in so many ways. Nobody else in your family suffers from this condition but you? Must have felt extremely isolating to manage it day-to-day with the aide making you stand out.

It can be stressful in terms of having to work long hours sometimes, but because I am an "NPC" to most people at work my short-tempered asshole boss forgets I exist even if he is constantly-venting at people in the cubicle farm down the hall whenever he needs an emotional tampon.

Both of my parents are psychologically-normal, and I am an only child so who knows where this disorder came from. I am guessing that it was some sort of unfortunate combination of recessive genes that lined up in the exact way to cause it.

Being followed by an aide was endless humiliation as it made me feel like one of the "special" (retarded) kids in school as aides were usually-assigned to students in special-ed so it got me branded withe same stigma despite being in AP classes in high school as I could hear the rumors being spread behind my back.

On the plus side, I was never targeted for humiliation or directly harassed because nobody would dare do anything with the aide always watching.

 

[goop]

Then that makes me one of the most unlucky people possible. Imagine only being given one life, and this is it.

Forced into involuntary loneliness. Wageslaving for a shit job. No friends irl.

I would have gladly took the option to have never been born.

There was some hadith that said that Allah shows you your entire life and then asks you 77 times if you want to be put on this earth. I'm not the unluckiest but if given the choice I never would choose to be born.

 

[pauseforever]

Even not considering the effects of looks, IQ, or psnality, this simple model says there has to be a moderate effect. See the linked paper: Talent_vs_Luck_the_role_of_randomness_in_success_and_failure

 

[Emba]

It's a cosmic joke

Hahahaha hahahaha hahahaha hahahaha!

Make it funny! Make it hurt less...

 

[Leon98]

 

[wasted12years]

I think "Just be her first" theory is often luck and randomness.

 

[Pancakecel]

It all comes down to luck and randomness. No one chooses their parents, no one chooses their genes, no one chooses the time period you are born in

everything is determined by factors outside of your control

 

[guessthatsit]

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