L
Lebensmüder
Soon to be deleted account
★★★
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2018
- Posts
- 5,202
Had two girls that I truly was interested in completely (in the sense that I truly wanted to be with them for the rest of my life if the chance offered itself) - one was an autistic girl (same diagnosis as me, same interests as me, roughly same vita), one was a slightly chubby girl who liked the same books as me. Since >two years I haven't had a crush on a (real) girl. Had many other women I tried to approach (found them attractive and compatible but it wasn't as strong as the feelings for the ones above) - in school I made at least a dozen approaches, in the first semesters of university I approached even more women - but most attempts were aborted after I realized that there was no interest.
After my first semesters I realized that it was pointless anyways. Said that I wanted to focus on dating after graduating (this was also the time where I realized that one wrong approach could cost you your job/education or lead to years of bullying which led to more skepticism towards the female gender as a whole), overestimated my own capabilities in that regard sadly, each day the suffering becomes worse. I also didn't meet anyone outside of my family since the beginning of COVID (and I honestly don't care because it is useless anyways).
After my first semesters I realized that it was pointless anyways. Said that I wanted to focus on dating after graduating (this was also the time where I realized that one wrong approach could cost you your job/education or lead to years of bullying which led to more skepticism towards the female gender as a whole), overestimated my own capabilities in that regard sadly, each day the suffering becomes worse. I also didn't meet anyone outside of my family since the beginning of COVID (and I honestly don't care because it is useless anyways).