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Serious How do you become a normal person? I don't know how to live...

Incline

Incline

I just have to keep going...
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May 1, 2019
Posts
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I watch a lot of youtube videos of people interacting with one another, having casual conversations, doing things, starting businesses and going to restaurants together, etc. I watch a lot of family blogs too and travel blogs of people.

I cannot emphasize enough how foreign the way they behave feels to me. I do not know how to act like this, I do not know how to be normal or talk about anything like that or go to restaurants, I've never even been to a restaurant by my own choice only when forced to go by others like work or stuff. I try to talk to people but it just comes out awful.

Most of the time people don't even bother talking to me before I even open my mouth. Like in the swimming pool last week, people there were having conversations randomly when resting between laps, but they never bothered to speak to me, but why what did I do that I was not even attempted to be spoken to, I mean I already know what I did, or rather what I didn't do, I didn't get good genetics so now I appear intimidating with my ugly bald slavic face and ugly as fuck people don't even bother talking to me.

And when they do I don't know how to talk, I don't know how to tone my voice, how to answer correctly, I try not to think about it and put the focus on them like some larpers told me to do but it doesn't really help. It's not even anxiety anymore I tried talking to people there which I wouldn't do if I was anxious about it but it just comes off retarded.

That is now how it looks like in my head...

I do not know how to live a normal life. I don't think I'll ever be able to do at this point in life anymore. I honestly think there is no much point left in living like this, I'm not suicidal but if I can't ascend in SEA then I'll just exit out because what am I supposed to be doing exactly? Should I just rot till my 50s with depression day in and out? I will either CO2, try join French foreign legion or go to Russia and sign a suicide contract.

I cope with philosophy and personal development, both mind and body. But it is just cope in the end, It is still not getting me any closer to being a normal person.

I need a brain transplant, I need to completely rewire my entire brain, wake up one day a new person. I am going to experiment with heavy psychedelic's soon hopefully this yields some results.
 
But it is just cope in the end, It is still not getting me any closer to being a normal person.
This is most resonating


Most of the time people don't even bother talking to me before I even open my mouth
And this

Normscum can't imagine how it feels when anyone treats you like non-human trash or some pedestrian who asked for a time or a way (while seeing you everyday).
 
i think it's impossible to become normie as a sub5 social outcast
 
Your signtaure is coomfuel ngl
 
Wtf why is this identical to me cunt.
Btw I don’t think it’s possible to be like them, seeing we aren’t normal people. I just cope with this fact by living on the internet as often as I can, reducing the amount of time I have to spend in the real world. That’s all I think any of us here can do.
 
This is most resonating



And this

Normscum can't imagine how it feels when anyone treats you like non-human trash or some pedestrian who asked for a time or a way (while seeing you everyday).
There is no hobby or passion which would be sensible because it'll be forever invisible, we can't share it to anyone, even if someone have similar they will see our faces, overall looks and autism (if present)

That's why we call it cope
 
Wtf why is this identical to me cunt.
Btw I don’t think it’s possible to be like them, seeing we aren’t normal people. I just cope with this fact by living on the internet as often as I can, reducing the amount of time I have to spend in the real world. That’s all I think any of us here can do.
I did that for 7 years but it gets boring eventually

I am 29 now I am not going to spend my entire life browsing through the same 5 websites everyday and just latching on any new content to consume like a mindless zombie. This is just utterly pointless, it is a life not even worthy of an animal or a lower beast. Death is a mercy kill at this point.

Something gotta give. This cannot continue. Hopefully I will receive some life-changing revelation either through my travels or psychadelics or whatever else comes my way soon or I don't see a reason to continue.
 
There is no hobby or passion which would be sensible because it'll be forever invisible, we can't share it to anyone, even if someone have similar they will see our faces, overall looks and autism (if present)

That's why we call it cope
:feelscry:
 
I tried with a few goth foids, it was totally irrelevant we're into same music, bands, had same depressive views while I don't look like average chinktok prettyboi who could be shown for her foid friends

I am ogre, ogres can't see any artism value (as common sense says)
 
You do you brother, as long as you find some form of happiness that’s all that matters.
I did that for 7 years but it gets boring eventually

I am 29 now I am not going to spend my entire life browsing through the same 5 websites everyday and just latching on any new content to consume like a mindless zombie. This is just utterly pointless, it is a life not even worthy of an animal or a lower beast. Death is a mercy kill at this point.

Something gotta give. This cannot continue. Hopefully I will receive some life-changing revelation either through my travels or psychadelics or whatever else comes my way soon or I don't see a reason to continue.
 
I tried with a few goth foids, it was totally irrelevant we're into same music, bands, had same depressive views while I don't look like average chinktok prettyboi who could be shown for her foid friends

I am ogre, ogres can't see any artism value (as common sense says)
Having Slavic genetics destroyed my face. Started balding at 18 now I look like I'm in my 40s when I'm 29. I am leanmaxxing but maybe I am doing this wrong, maybe I should ogremaxx and put on 20kg of lean muscle mass with steroids and just look like a typical Slavic ogre:

1729178483463

Maybe then I can appeal to some foids?

I don't know what to do anymore :feelsseriously:

I unironically do not love my mother. I will never tell her this, because it would break her heart. But I do not like my mother and I do not love her. It is DIRECTLY her fault that my life is such a fucking disaster. She chose to fuck some subhuman retard who gave me utterly useless and garbage facial genetics that turned my life into living hell. How can I love someone like this?

How can I love someone who is responsible for 95% of misery in my life?

I do not hate my mother, but I definitely do not love her. I will shed no tear when she dies. This is sad but I feel it is entirely justified looking back at my life experience there is nothing unreasonable about this statement. I am also being nice by hiding this fact from her and I will keep it to myself forever more, but it is the truth.
 
If I remember correctly you were planning on surgerymaxxing right? I'd rather start with this one and fully focus on it and then see if social interactions improved in any way. They might eventually just take care of themselves once you're an HTN

If you wanna come to russia do it for the foreigner halo, not for the sui contract, the foids here are beautiful and not very westernized yet
 
Having Slavic genetics destroyed my face. Started balding at 18 now I look like I'm in my 40s when I'm 29. I am leanmaxxing but maybe I am doing this wrong, maybe I should ogremaxx and put on 20kg of lean muscle mass with steroids and just look like a typical Slavic ogre:

View attachment 1295973
Maybe then I can appeal to some foids?

I don't know what to do anymore :feelsseriously:

I unironically do not love my mother. I will never tell her this, because it would break her heart. But I do not like my mother and I do not love her. It is DIRECTLY her fault that my life is such a fucking disaster. She chose to fuck some subhuman retard who gave me utterly useless and garbage facial genetics that turned my life into living hell. How can I love someone like this?

How can I love someone who is responsible for 95% of misery in my life?

I do not hate my mother, but I definitely do not love her. I will shed no tear when she dies. This is sad but I feel it is entirely justified looking back at my life experience there is nothing unreasonable about this statement. I am also being nice by hiding this fact from her and I will keep it to myself forever more, but it is the truth.
you can looks at it the other way; it's your father who got to breed you out of a good-looking foid, instead of just getting his lookmatch, and you'd be then worse off
 
If I remember correctly you were planning on surgerymaxxing right? I'd rather start with this one and fully focus on it and then see if social interactions improved in any way. They might eventually just take care of themselves once you're an HTN

If you wanna come to russia do it for the foreigner halo, not for the sui contract, the foids here are beautiful and not very westernized yet

Yeah I was but I gave up on it because the Maximillian surgeons in Europe are either giga expensive for what I want bimax+genio is like 30k Euros and I can't afford that and going to SEA at the same time. Or they are unproven and untested like some no-name Turkey surgeons with lots of bad feedback.

I decided to just get Dermal fillers as a half-measure for now. Maybe I'll get Genio later. I'll do non-surgical rhinoplasty face lifts and dermal fillers to increase chin definition. I might also do fat transfer but idk about that. Aside from that SMP for my hair and a whole lot of frauding with eye colour frauding, height frauding, etc...

Hopefully this will be enough to ascend if not then Idc anymore I tried my best.

I will get no foreign halo in Russia I am basically fucking russian JFL I got 100% slavic genetics its over.
 
I want bimax+genio
You sure you need bimax? Maybe genio would be enough for now and you can do bimax later if necessary? Genio is a lot cheaper and has a way less brutal recovery and complications chance

face lifts
I'm planning this one too, though as far as I understand it's better to wait untill you're at least in your mid 30's before your first facelift. Unless you're really saggy already

dermal fillers to increase chin definition.
I was considering this one too, it's obviously way cheaper and faster results than genio and with almost no recovery time, but I've seen too many evidence of fillers migrating and never really dissolving, which results in fucking up your facial harmony and skin tightness, and if you're gonna dissolve it manually you can lose some of your natural collagen with it. Do your research of course brocel, but in my case I think I'll keep saving up for genio, my chin is pretty much non existent so I will gain a lot from the surgery. I'm really tempted to just go and inject some of that shit all in one day and to get a taste of what having a chin feels like but I'm way too fucking scared of it migrating
I am basically fucking russian
I'm a russiancel, born and raised. Our foids are not as lookistic as the western ones so I hope I'll still have a chance after all the surgeries
 
You sure you need bimax? Maybe genio would be enough for now and you can do bimax later if necessary? Genio is a lot cheaper and has a way less brutal recovery and complications chance


I'm planning this one too, though as far as I understand it's better to wait untill you're at least in your mid 30's before your first facelift. Unless you're really saggy already


I was considering this one too, it's obviously way cheaper and faster results than genio and with almost no recovery time, but I've seen too many evidence of fillers migrating and never really dissolving, which results in fucking up your facial harmony and skin tightness, and if you're gonna dissolve it manually you can lose some of your natural collagen with it. Do your research of course brocel, but in my case I think I'll keep saving up for genio, my chin is pretty much non existent so I will gain a lot from the surgery. I'm really tempted to just go and inject some of that shit all in one day and to get a taste of what having a chin feels like but I'm way too fucking scared of it migrating

I'm a russiancel, born and raised. Our foids are not as lookistic as the western ones so I hope I'll still have a chance after all the surgeries
Dermal fillers migrate when placed badly or in areas like under eye which I won't do, there u need fat transfer.

You got special fillers now days for chin they rarely migrate unless u get punched in the face 24/7 or some shit JFL.

I weighted on genio but I ain't got time for recovery and besides if dermalls allow me to ascend even once I'll be satisfied.
 
I know these feels, especially the part with my parents.
 
Normal people don't have autism stamped on their forehead
 
Normalfags are the ones who are acting wrong, always stabbing each other in the back to maintain there position in the social order, every emotion they publicly express is carefully manufactured so they look acceptable to the social zeitgeist. It's a cacophony of fraudulence that permeates through their an entire being. You are only strange to them because you do not fall in line, not because you don't want to but because you are incapable of it. Don't fell so bad you could be a bluepilled normalfag who lets women walk all over him for nothing in return.
 
Normalfags are the ones who are acting wrong, always stabbing each other in the back to maintain there position in the social order, every emotion they publicly express is carefully manufactured so they look acceptable to the social zeitgeist. It's a cacophony of fraudulence that permeates through their an entire being. You are only strange to them because you do not fall in line, not because you don't want to but because you are incapable of it. Don't fell so bad you could be a bluepilled normalfag who lets women walk all over him for nothing in return.
Autism has too much control over how I act externally. This is devastating no amount of coping like this will free me. I'm fine with having an autist mind but I'm not fine with how it makes me look like a retard to every person I try to talk to, this has to end, I will find a way to rewire my brain.
 
Have you ever drank alcohol? Because its basically the cure. You probably have too little GABA in your brains compared to normies.
 
foreign legion is unironically a good solution if you're still young enough
 
foreign legion is unironically a good solution if you're still young enough
I will be 30 when I get there if I try.

They got a massive rejection rate though, but I hope my degree and IT background will make me look high IQ so they take me along with shredded physique I'm about to get over the next 1-2 years.
 
Have you ever drank alcohol? Because its basically the cure. You probably have too little GABA in your brains compared to normies.
Yes I drank Alcohol.

Alcohol doesn't make you less autistic it just makes you not give a fuck and act more confident but it also impedes your senses the more you drink, it's a balance. I literally cannot function in social situations without alcohol so I used to abuse it a lot but I hate alcohol. I'm not a drunktard, even though when I was trying to be social I abused alcohol on a daily I never got addicted to it, it's literally just a tool for me to be less autistic and that's how I always seen it, I never drink alcohol alone as a copium mechanism like many slavs do, I don't even fucking like the taste of beer it's fucking disgusting, that's why I rather drink spirits they get the job done faster, though I noticed beer makes me feel better than spirits idk why that is.

Idk how people can enjoy beer, that shit is so fucking disgusting. I force myself to drink it but it's not something I would EVER buy if I had a choice of beverage JFL. I tried many beer brands, I used to drink it a lot when in University and out with people trying to socialize.

I will use Alcohol but I need more solutions, something more drastic and permanent, Alcohol is nothing more but a masking solution, just like Phenibut.
 
I watch a lot of youtube videos of people interacting with one another, having casual conversations, doing things, starting businesses and going to restaurants together, etc. I watch a lot of family blogs too and travel blogs of people.

I cannot emphasize enough how foreign the way they behave feels to me. I do not know how to act like this, I do not know how to be normal or talk about anything like that or go to restaurants, I've never even been to a restaurant by my own choice only when forced to go by others like work or stuff. I try to talk to people but it just comes out awful.

Most of the time people don't even bother talking to me before I even open my mouth. Like in the swimming pool last week, people there were having conversations randomly when resting between laps, but they never bothered to speak to me, but why what did I do that I was not even attempted to be spoken to, I mean I already know what I did, or rather what I didn't do, I didn't get good genetics so now I appear intimidating with my ugly bald slavic face and ugly as fuck people don't even bother talking to me.

And when they do I don't know how to talk, I don't know how to tone my voice, how to answer correctly, I try not to think about it and put the focus on them like some larpers told me to do but it doesn't really help. It's not even anxiety anymore I tried talking to people there which I wouldn't do if I was anxious about it but it just comes off retarded.

That is now how it looks like in my head...

I do not know how to live a normal life. I don't think I'll ever be able to do at this point in life anymore. I honestly think there is no much point left in living like this, I'm not suicidal but if I can't ascend in SEA then I'll just exit out because what am I supposed to be doing exactly? Should I just rot till my 50s with depression day in and out? I will either CO2, try join French foreign legion or go to Russia and sign a suicide contract.

I cope with philosophy and personal development, both mind and body. But it is just cope in the end, It is still not getting me any closer to being a normal person.

I need a brain transplant, I need to completely rewire my entire brain, wake up one day a new person. I am going to experiment with heavy psychedelic's soon hopefully this yields some results.
This really resonates with me. I have traces of knowledge, an idea of what is supposed to be but you don't really understand it. If I were to magically get a girlfriend tommorow I'd have no idea what to do or how to ever interact with her because even the action of speaking to a woman is an alien concept to me. Not just women, but people in general. It took me years for me to get the most basic things right when people expect you to have the years of social experience they do. Like a 7th grader being dropped into advanced mathematics.
 
I will be 30 when I get there if I try.

They got a massive rejection rate though, but I hope my degree and IT background will make me look high IQ so they take me along with shredded physique I'm about to get over the next 1-2 years.
I consider the FFL heavily aswell

The massive rejection rate comes from third worlders and people who don't have alot of conditions to be fighting signing up. If you're from the first world and come with a good body and no real issues I believe you should do fine.
 
Yes I drank Alcohol.

Alcohol doesn't make you less autistic it just makes you not give a fuck and act more confident but it also impedes your senses the more you drink, it's a balance. I literally cannot function in social situations without alcohol so I used to abuse it a lot but I hate alcohol. I'm not a drunktard, even though when I was trying to be social I abused alcohol on a daily I never got addicted to it, it's literally just a tool for me to be less autistic and that's how I always seen it, I never drink alcohol alone as a copium mechanism like many slavs do, I don't even fucking like the taste of beer it's fucking disgusting, that's why I rather drink spirits they get the job done faster, though I noticed beer makes me feel better than spirits idk why that is.

Idk how people can enjoy beer, that shit is so fucking disgusting. I force myself to drink it but it's not something I would EVER buy if I had a choice of beverage JFL. I tried many beer brands, I used to drink it a lot when in University and out with people trying to socialize.

I will use Alcohol but I need more solutions, something more drastic and permanent, Alcohol is nothing more but a masking solution, just like Phenibut.
I've been experimenting with supplements. Like magnesium, taurine (activates gaba B receptors very uniquely like phenibut), NAC, valerian root... I see some improvement in anxiety since all of these either increase gaba or reduce glutamate. But ofc its nothing compared to alcohol or benzos.
 
I've been experimenting with supplements. Like magnesium, taurine (activates gaba B receptors very uniquely like phenibut), NAC, valerian root... I see some improvement in anxiety since all of these either increase gaba or reduce glutamate. But ofc its nothing compared to alcohol or benzos.
I bought some magnesium and gaba, roots, etc before and taken them regularly but noticed 0 difference so stopped.
 
I watch a lot of youtube videos of people interacting with one another, having casual conversations, doing things, starting businesses and going to restaurants together, etc. I watch a lot of family blogs too and travel blogs of people.

I cannot emphasize enough how foreign the way they behave feels to me. I do not know how to act like this, I do not know how to be normal or talk about anything like that or go to restaurants, I've never even been to a restaurant by my own choice only when forced to go by others like work or stuff. I try to talk to people but it just comes out awful.

Most of the time people don't even bother talking to me before I even open my mouth. Like in the swimming pool last week, people there were having conversations randomly when resting between laps, but they never bothered to speak to me, but why what did I do that I was not even attempted to be spoken to, I mean I already know what I did, or rather what I didn't do, I didn't get good genetics so now I appear intimidating with my ugly bald slavic face and ugly as fuck people don't even bother talking to me.

And when they do I don't know how to talk, I don't know how to tone my voice, how to answer correctly, I try not to think about it and put the focus on them like some larpers told me to do but it doesn't really help. It's not even anxiety anymore I tried talking to people there which I wouldn't do if I was anxious about it but it just comes off retarded.

That is now how it looks like in my head...

I do not know how to live a normal life. I don't think I'll ever be able to do at this point in life anymore. I honestly think there is no much point left in living like this, I'm not suicidal but if I can't ascend in SEA then I'll just exit out because what am I supposed to be doing exactly? Should I just rot till my 50s with depression day in and out? I will either CO2, try join French foreign legion or go to Russia and sign a suicide contract.

I cope with philosophy and personal development, both mind and body. But it is just cope in the end, It is still not getting me any closer to being a normal person.

I need a brain transplant, I need to completely rewire my entire brain, wake up one day a new person. I am going to experiment with heavy psychedelic's soon hopefully this yields some results.
You missed out on your social and developmental milestones. Don't bother.
 
You have to look the part.
It's all looks.
You want to be normal, you have to look normal.
 
Frankly i lost hope year ago, i will NEVER be able to hide my autism and fit into society, never wil find a wife, pass me genes, i simply can't do what to normies comes naturally
 
Hard to be normal being an incel
 
simple, you just give yourself time. don't be in a rush to answer normalfags. speak slow and clear.
I am going to experiment with heavy psychedelic's soon hopefully this yields some results.
good luck :feelsYall:
 
Have you ever drank alcohol? Because its basically the cure. You probably have too little GABA in your brains compared to normies.
I'm still socially retarded when drunk. It probably works if you just have social anxiety, I doubt it helps full blown autism.
 
I did that for 7 years but it gets boring eventually

I am 29 now I am not going to spend my entire life browsing through the same 5 websites everyday and just latching on any new content to consume like a mindless zombie. This is just utterly pointless, it is a life not even worthy of an animal or a lower beast. Death is a mercy kill at this point.

Something gotta give. This cannot continue. Hopefully I will receive some life-changing revelation either through my travels or psychadelics or whatever else comes my way soon or I don't see a reason to continue.
Brutal
 
I watch a lot of youtube videos of people interacting with one another, having casual conversations, doing things, starting businesses and going to restaurants together, etc. I watch a lot of family blogs too and travel blogs of people.

I cannot emphasize enough how foreign the way they behave feels to me. I do not know how to act like this, I do not know how to be normal or talk about anything like that or go to restaurants, I've never even been to a restaurant by my own choice only when forced to go by others like work or stuff. I try to talk to people but it just comes out awful.

Most of the time people don't even bother talking to me before I even open my mouth. Like in the swimming pool last week, people there were having conversations randomly when resting between laps, but they never bothered to speak to me, but why what did I do that I was not even attempted to be spoken to, I mean I already know what I did, or rather what I didn't do, I didn't get good genetics so now I appear intimidating with my ugly bald slavic face and ugly as fuck people don't even bother talking to me.

And when they do I don't know how to talk, I don't know how to tone my voice, how to answer correctly, I try not to think about it and put the focus on them like some larpers told me to do but it doesn't really help. It's not even anxiety anymore I tried talking to people there which I wouldn't do if I was anxious about it but it just comes off retarded.

That is now how it looks like in my head...

I do not know how to live a normal life. I don't think I'll ever be able to do at this point in life anymore. I honestly think there is no much point left in living like this, I'm not suicidal but if I can't ascend in SEA then I'll just exit out because what am I supposed to be doing exactly? Should I just rot till my 50s with depression day in and out? I will either CO2, try join French foreign legion or go to Russia and sign a suicide contract.

I cope with philosophy and personal development, both mind and body. But it is just cope in the end, It is still not getting me any closer to being a normal person.

I need a brain transplant, I need to completely rewire my entire brain, wake up one day a new person. I am going to experiment with heavy psychedelic's soon hopefully this yields some results.
life just isnt for us
the more i tried to fit in
the worse things got for me
 
People always love to talk about themselves. So I just keep asking questions about their life and such, and try to expand on those questions, and find some common ground (people also like it when you can relate to them as well, so they don't feel like they're the only ones that feel way).
 

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