I think your 60 your old grandma shouldn't count. If a female business colleague shakes your hand as part of an interview or something, that doesn't count either.
The main factors at play here are the age of the female, and how much corporate or monetary or spiritual coersion is involved in inducing the hand holding or kiss. As well as how platonic the context is in general.
For example,
I do think that if a non-related french girl did "la bise" which is that friendly kiss greeting of both cheeks, that will automatically revoke your KHHV status, especially if you are not French yourself. There is no corporate pressure for her to do that. It's entirely consensual on her part, only mild cultural pressure from being French. But no one forced her to do that. She did it and was not disgusted. You simply are not KHHV.
However, if you were an actor (unlikely but there are roles for ugly men like the rapist Joe Son) and the actress HAD to kiss you because it was part of her job. That shouldn't count, because she's basically a whore, because all actresses are whores. That actress would never kiss you or hold hands with you without being expressly given purpose and payment to.
If you went to church, and an attractive foid held your hand, that technically doesn't count either, because GOD and the entire ministry was coercing her to hold your hand as part of a religious ceremony. If God did not command her to hold your hand, she never would, therefore it should not count against your KHHV status.
If a foid was alone and she trusted you AS A FRIEND, to hold her hand across Skid Row to get to her car. Consider your KHHV status revoked. She trusted YOU more than dangerous drug addicts on the street to get to her car. She willingly made an offer because you make her feel safe and that she feels like you can protect her. Even though she doesn't want to date you, the fact that she feels so safe around you, is not KHHV material.