Serious How do male BPDs (especially if ugly) cope?

[Mainländer]

Female BPDs lack a sense of self so they pretty much feel the "need" of always having a partner to "see themselves through" apparently, and since they'll invariably split on them and discard them for no reason after a couple of months at best, they have to keep monkeybranching and getting new partners, which we all know is ridiculously easy for a foid to do.

What about male BPDs though? Even as a Chadlite it's not that easy to have an endless supply of new partners like that as a straight male. As a normie, you'd have to put massive effort and probably still wouldn't succeed and go through dry spells. As an ugly male, it's pretty much impossible. What do male BPDs do, they just rot alone while suffering even more than a regular incel? @Atavistic Autist

 

[Deleted member 14805]

What's a BPDS?

 

[Deleted member 27768]

What's a BPDS?

Some mental illness faggotry

 

[Billowel]

bpd is a female only disease.Bpd only occurs to fat bitches who are lead to believe they have a chance with chad,a chance at a good job but then get used and throw out and sometimes never picked at all,and then get "sad" over their "sad" life.I guess chadlites can have "bpd".

 

[Mainländer]

What's a BPDS?

People with borderline disorder. It's an extremely sad mental illness that destroys the lives of the ones who have it as well as the lives of men who get into relationships with them. They basically have the emotional maturity of a 2 yo baby (so no sense of self, no object contancy, no real empathy, can only see people as objects, among many other limitations like that) and are stuck in infant trauma that they keep recreating through an endless stream of partners (many of which get destroyed after being love-bombed and getting extremely attached to them and then getting discarded like trash overnight by them).

 

[Tenshi]

They're usually dark triads which helps them a little bit. They have their emotional 'object', which will be the wife or gf whose they'll constantly abuse and whenever they turn them down (i.e failing to provide them affection or validation, at least on the BPD mind which is messed up) they'll just cheat on their partners.

If the partner find out they'll blame on them and gaslight them into believing they actually did something wrong that forced his behaviour (in this case, cheating). BPD are very needy constantly looking for validation and are extremely afraid of being blamed on or having to take responsability for their own actions.

They're almost like psycho grown up kids.

PS: My dad has BPD

 

[Mainländer]

bpd is a female only disease.Bpd only occurs to fat bitches who are lead to believe they have a chance with chad,a chance at a good job but then get used and throw out and sometimes never picked at all,and then get "sad" over their "sad" life.I guess chadlites can have "bpd".

It certainly is a much more female than male thing, but apparently there are male ones too, I've seen people here saying they have it.

They're usually dark triads which helps them a little bit. They have their emotional 'object', which will be the wife or gf whose they'll constantly abuse and whenever they turn them down (i.e failing to provide them affection or validation, at least on the BPD mind which is messed up) they'll just cheat on their partners.

If the partner find out they'll blame on them and gaslight them into believing they actually did something wrong that forced his behaviour (in this case, cheating). BPD are very needy constantly looking for validation and are extremely afraid of being blamed on or having to take responsability for their own actions.

They are emotional infants. They'll lie in ways that usually only kids do, like being caught red-handed and still insisting you didn't do it, etc.

I saw someone on the internet defining BPDs as "vulnerable narcissists", which is a pretty fitting definition tbh. They are manipulative, selfish, cheating liars exactly like narcissists, except that narcissists do it out of careful planning and coldness while BPDs do it because of their extremely arrested emotional development and infant-like urges. It's an infant version of selfishness.

PS: My dad has BPD

I'm sorry you had to go through that. My family is full of mentally ill people but luckily no one has cluster B shit.

 

[Deleted member 29529]

There seems to be no known causes for BPD, its diagnosis is based on symptoms. Maybe its developing depends on “enabling” circumstances which an ugly male would be less likely to experience. If an ugly man were to suffer from BPD, I guess he would quickly ruin all sorts of relationships with persons that would be way less forgiving with him than if he were more attractive or a woman. Then you get all the depression-related symptoms of BPD.

 

[Mainländer]

There seems to be no known causes for BPD

Isn't it caused by abandonment as a baby? Like, being left alone/unattended through long periods of time and stuff like that. It seems to be the most accepted theory at least.

 

[Tenshi]

They are emotional infants. They'll lie in ways that usually only kids do, like being caught red-handed and still insisting you didn't do it, etc.

I saw someone on the internet defining BPDs as "vulnerable narcissists", which is a pretty fitting definition tbh. They are manipulative, selfish, cheating liars exactly like narcissists, except that narcissists do it out of careful planning and coldness while BPDs do it because of their extremely arrested emotional development and infant-like urges. It's an infant version of selfishness.

Yeah these disorders are very similar in a way. I'd say the "goals" of narcissists and BPDs are different but the modus operandi is almost the same. Actually, quite a lot of people say that narcissist parents are the cause of BPD kids. That wouldn't surprise me at all, by the way my dad and his siblings describe my grandma she was probably narcissistic, and my dad ended up being what they call the "golden child".

Something I forgot to tell you is that men (and women as well I guess) with this disorder are very sexual. Borderline nymphomaniacs, so they likely will induge in excessive prostitution. When they do not seek prostitution or promiscuity in general, they'll abuse alcohol or other drugs. Maybe they do it all. They feel empty so they cope with vices.

I'm sorry you had to go through that. My family is full of mentally ill people but luckily no one has cluster B shit.

It was a terrible experience (especially since among male BPD there's a common thing that happens when they become parents which leads to constantly abuse the child for some time, I'm broken for good thanks to that. but I don't get it anything as bad as my mom does. I really feel bad for her.

Ngl, I love my dad (somehow) but there were many times when I wished he could just die. I'm sorry but to be truly honest I think people with cluster B disorders really should die.

 

[Mainländer]

Yeah these disorders are very similar in a way. I'd say the "goals" of narcissists and BPDs are different but the modus operandi is almost the same. Actually, quite a lot of people say that narcissist parents are the cause of BPD kids. That wouldn't surprise me at all, by the way my dad and his siblings describe my grandma she was probably narcissistic, and my dad ended up being what they call the "golden child".

That makes a lot of sense.

Something I forgot to tell you is that men (and women as well I guess) with this disorder are very sexual. Borderline nymphomaniacs, so they likely will induge in excessive prostitution. When they do not seek prostitution or promiscuity in general, they'll abuse alcohol or other drugs. Maybe they do it all. They feel empty so they cope with vices.

Yeah I know about it. It's sad af shit and extremely hurtful for the men who engage with them, because what they usually do is not hookups but rather entering in committed relationships with men, love-bombing them and mirroring their tastes, playing the absolute perfect gf for them and then when the splitting happens, they go from 100 to 0 overnight and cheat, ghost, disappear, discard, etc. Another sad thing about them is that the treatment for it takes years and many don't even seek it.

I think people with cluster B disorders really should die.

It's very sad but if they don't accept treatment, it's indeed the best outcome pragmatically speaking. Their existence is pretty much only dysfunction and making people suffer. In the particular case of BPDs, suffering a lot themselves as well. This world is truly hell.

 

[Tenshi]

It's very sad but if they don't accept treatment, it's indeed the best outcome. Their existence is pretty much only dysfunction and making people suffer. This world is truly hell.

I wish I could dope my dad with drugs but you'll be lucky if you see a BPD actually seeking or willing to accept treatment. The mere suggest that they may have something wrong is enough to cause them to rage. Well, things tend to get a little bit better with time but I doubt they can cure themselves. It's a personality disorder afterall...

I guess it's just part of the fear of being blamed on, suggesting they may be the cause of their problems is terrifying for them. The sad thing is that it's also painful for them just to be alive, that's why so many of them rope.

Some people indeed face hell on earth. Makes you wonder what kind of world we're living in...

 

[Mainländer]

I wish I could dope my dad with drugs but you'll be lucky if you see a BPD actually seeking or willing to accept treatment. The mere suggest that they may have something wrong is enough to cause them to rage. Well, things tend to get a little bit better with time but I doubt they can cure themselves. It's a personality disorder afterall...

I guess it's just part of the fear of being blamed on, suggesting they may be the cause of their problems is terrifying for them. The sad thing is that it's also painful for them just to be alive, that's why so many of them rope.

Some people indeed face hell on earth. Makes you wonder what kind of world we're living in...

The saddest part of all is that modern soyciety encourages BPDs to indulge in most of their maladaptive copes (extremely promiscuity, monkeybranching, degrading sexual practices and masochism outside of marriage, transgenderism and genital/breast mutilation, etc).

Since women are such social sponges, it's no wonder why most BPDs won't seek treatment. People nowadays actually believe living like that is something normal that can be fulfilling. Cliffs: it isn't, if you're a BPD woman reading this do yourself and the world a favor and stop monkeybranching from relationship to relationship and destroying yourself and men and go get treatment for that shit.

 

[Tenshi]

The saddest part of all is that modern soyciety encourages BPDs to indulge in most of their maladaptive copes (extremely promiscuity, monkeybranching, degrading sexual practices and masochism outside of marriage, transgenderism and genital/breast multilation, etc).

Since women are such social sponges, it's no wonder why most BPDs won't seek treatment. People actually believe living like that is something normal that can be fulfilling nowadays. Cliffs: it isn't, if you're a BPD woman reading this do yourself and the world a favor and stop monkeybranching from relationship to relationship and destroying yourself and men and go get treatment for that shit.

True shit. Well to be fair BPD itself is probably a byproduct of modern society, as well as all personality disorders and many other mental illnesses. We just shouldn't be living the way we do.

May I ask why are you interested in this subject?

 

[Mainländer]

I guess it's just part of the fear of being blamed on, suggesting they may be the cause of their problems is terrifying for them. The sad thing is that it's also painful for them just to be alive, that's why so many of them rope.

Yeah, not taking responsibility for the things you do is already a female characteristic, when you add the BPD factor to it, it makes them utterly incapable of doing so for their lives.

 

[The Abyss]

I sometimes confused bpd with bipolar, different stuff though eh.

 

[Mainländer]

True shit. Well to be fair BPD itself is probably a byproduct of modern society, as well as all personality disorders and many other mental illnesses. We just shouldn't be living the way we do.

I think it probably already existed in the past but I have no doubt it exploded in these last decades.

May I ask why are you interested in this subject?

Like I said in my other thread, seeing both the BrendioEEE case with Tahlia and a low tier normie friend getting destroyed by a girl who certainly has BPD made me interested in reading about it. I realized that low tier men have to be very wary of BPDs, since they do seem to not care about looks nearly as much as normal foids and they commonly infiltrate male-only spaces and target needy men.

 

[Tenshi]

Like I said in my other thread, seeing both the BrendioEEE case with Tahlia and a low tier normie friend getting destroyed by a girl who certainly has BPD made me interested in reading about it. I realized that low tier men have to be very wary of BPDs, since they do seem to not care about looks nearly as much as normal foids and they commonly infiltrate male-only spaces and target needy men.

Do you know a brazilian youtube channel called Vitor Honk Honk? This guy makes MGTOW/Blackpill podcasts, he did a series of videos where he talks about his experience with an BPD gf he had. Quite interesting you should check it out.

 

[Mainländer]

Do you know a brazilian youtube channel called Vitor Honk Honk? This guy makes MGTOW/Blackpill podcasts, he did a series of videos where he talks about his experience with an BPD gf he had. Quite interesting you should check it out.

How much suifuel is it in a scale from 1 through 10? Depending on your answer I'll check on it, kek.

Recently all my low tier normie friends and acquaintances seem to have "ascended" (even though one of them got screwed like aforementioned), and I don't know exactly why but it makes me more uncomfortable than usual now to see men talking about gfs, sex, etc. Even though my goal at this point is not wanting all of that shit anymore more than anything tbh. But since I obviously still didn't accomplish it, it feels bad.

 

[Romello Gaghan 2]

Gay! For real. That's gay. It's a foid disease, you know.

 

[Mainländer]

Gay! For real. That's gay. It's a foid disease, you know.

I wish @IntolerantSocialist was still around to give us his perspective, he said he suffered from BPD.

 

[Deleted member 19546]

There seems to be no known causes for BPD, its diagnosis is based on symptoms. Maybe its developing depends on “enabling” circumstances which an ugly male would be less likely to experience. If an ugly man were to suffer from BPD, I guess he would quickly ruin all sorts of relationships with persons that would be way less forgiving with him than if he were more attractive or a woman. Then you get all the depression-related symptoms of BPD.

Very High IQ from a GrAYcel

 

[Romello Gaghan 2]

I wish @IntolerantSocialist was still around to give us his perspective, he said he suffered from BPD.

Why was he ousted? Requested?

 

[Mainländer]

Why was he ousted? Requested?

If I remember correctly he would sperg out and say "go ER"-esque stuff a lot.

 

[Romello Gaghan 2]

If I remember correctly he would sperg out and say "go ER"-esque stuff a lot.

based

 

[Tenshi]

How much suifuel is it in a scale from 1 through 10? Depending on your answer I'll check on it, kek.

Recently all my low tier normie friends and acquaintances seem to have "ascended" (even though one of them got screwed like aforementioned), and I don't know exactly why but it makes me more uncomfortable than usual now to see men talking about gfs, sex, etc. Even though my goal at this point is not wanting all of that shit anymore more than anything tbh. But since I obviously still didn't accomplish it, it feels bad.

tbh I don't really remember it's been quite a while since I've watched it, kek but it was interesting the guys is weirdly pleasant to listen to imo

I feel you man. It was a shock for me when I reconnected with some low tier friends of mine from HS and they all have had sex, I felt like utter shit. You kinda feel like you're being left behind, missing important things idk. It sucks

 

[Mainländer]

tbh I don't really remember it's been quite a while since I've watched it, kek but it was interesting the guys is weirdly pleasant to listen to imo

I feel you man. It was a shock for me when I reconnected with some low tier friends of mine from HS and they all have had sex, I felt like utter shit. You kinda feel like you're being left behind, missing important things idk. It sucks

At this point I have ambivalent feelings about it. I know it's impossible to have a truly successful relationship on this day and age, but still, yeah, I do feel lonely and left behind anyway. I feel so frustrated about the lack of control over my focus and emotions as of late. I had really intense sadness, hopelessness, and utter lack of motivation episodes as of late as you might remember. That's another reason why I want pills. I want to kill my libido, it won't be put to any good use anyway.

 

[Tenshi]

At this point I have ambivalent feelings about it. I know it's impossible to have a truly successful relationship on this day and age, but still, yeah, I do feel lonely and left behind anyway. I feel so frustrated about the lack of control over my focus and emotions as of late. I had really intense sadness, hopelessness, and utter lack of motivation episodes as of late as you might remember. That's another reason why I want pills. I want to kill my libido, it won't be put to any good use anyway.

Man you should get yourself some. I know what people say about it and it sucks but when you reach this point you really need to do what you need to do. It may be not ideal but if you feel like that's what you have to do, go for it.

I can tell you that pills saved my life, I'll never regret taking it. Maybe in the future I won't need them who knows but it definitely helped me go through a very delicate moment of my life.

I take Prozac with is a pretty safe drug and you can easily get a prescription here in Brazil, not to mention that it's covered by healthcare so you won't even need to buy it. Don't be afraid to do what you need to do. Stay safe bro.

 

[Mainländer]

Man you should get yourself some. I know what people say about it and it sucks but when you reach this point you really need to do what you need to do. It may be not ideal but if you feel like that's what you have to do, go for it.

I can tell you that pills saved my life, I'll never regret taking it. Maybe in the future I won't need them who knows but it definitely helped me go through a very delicate moment of my life.

Thanks for sharing that. Yeah, I was always wary of taking those but I'm too far gone now and I just want something to help me get by.

it's covered by healthcare

You mean by SUS?

Also, did it dimish your libido? Tbh I'm afraid of keeping my libido and just getting impotent, kek.

 

[Deleted member 14805]

People with borderline disorder. It's an extremely sad mental illness that destroys the lives of the ones who have it as well as the lives of men who get into relationships with them. They basically have the emotional maturity of a 2 yo baby (so no sense of self, no object contancy, no real empathy, can only see people as objects, among many other limitations like that) and are stuck in infant trauma that they keep recreating through an endless stream of partners (many of which get destroyed after being love-bombed and getting extremely attached to them and then getting discarded like trash overnight by them).

Ooook. I wasn't sure what BPDS stood for. Anyway as for the thread isn't BPDS mainly a mental illness women have? I never met a dude with this kind of illness NGL.

 

[Mainländer]

Ooook. I wasn't sure what BPDS stood for. Anyway as for the thread isn't BPDS mainly a mental illness women have? I never met a dude with this kind of illness NGL.

Like I said earlier, yeah, it's primarily a foid disorder but apparently men can have it too.

 

[Uglymuggly]

I don’t have BPD. I’m just ugly and I drink and smoke weed to cope

 

[Mainländer]

I don’t have BPD. I’m just ugly and I drink and smoke weed to cope

Offtopics me. I don't have BPD either, but I also don't drink or smoke anything.

 

[SillyTruecel]

Just make a whole thread about a mental disease that you don't have and is no related to inceldom, theory.

 

[Mainländer]

Just make a whole thread about a mental disease that you don't have and is no related to inceldom, theory.

But how men who do have that disease cope with the fact they're incels is something related to inceldom. Like I said, I've seen people here admitting to having it in the past.

 

[Atavistic Autist]

BPD is highly correlated with vulnerable narcissism, or failed/fallen narcissism, which is what Elliot Rodger exhibited, and these things provide an easy pathway into Factor 2 psychopathy (highly neurotic and violent behavior).

So, to answer your question, men with BPD-like traits often end up dead or in prison. The difference with women is that the men are more likely to physically hurt others rather than physically hurt themselves.

 

[Mainländer]

BPD is highly correlated with vulnerable narcissism, or failed/fallen narcissism, which is what Elliot Rodger exhibited, and these things provide an easy pathway into Factor 2 psychopathy (highly neurotic and violent behavior).

So, to answer your question, men with BPD-like traits often end up dead or in prison. The difference with women is that the men are more likely to hurt others rather than hurt themselves.

Thanks for the answer, brutal shit. Don't you have BPD?

 

[Atavistic Autist]

Thanks for the answer, brutal shit. Don't you have BPD?

While I wouldn't say I'm on the verge of psychosis (lol), I clearly failed in my narcissistic strategy when I was young, and thus acquired (or re-acquired) highly neurotic, BPD-like traits which stick with me today.

Thanks to my autism, I have a long memory, and can remember interacting with my grandiose False Self at 10 years old and then becoming disassociated and neurotic at 11 and 12, as represented by my OCD.

BPDs are best understood as failed narcissists, in much this way.

 

[Mainländer]

I wouldn't call myself on the verge of psychosis (lol), but I clearly failed in my narcissistic strategy when I was young, and thus acquired (or re-acquired) highly neurotic, BPD-like traits which stick with me today.

Interesting. When I tried to put up a cool facade as a kid, I'd usually go for the laid-back badass type of behavior instead of the narcissist one.

Thanks to my autism, I have a long memory, and can literally remember interacting with my grandiose False Self at 10 years old, and becoming more disassociated and neurotic at 11 and 12, as best represented by my OCD.

That doesn't sound very BPD, don't BPDs have shitty long term memory? It goes along with the lack of object constancy and the splitting shit they do, it would be difficult to split so brutally if you kept reminiscing about the loving phase of the relationship. Normal people have to "cool down" a bit before moving like that.

 

[Deleted member 26032]

Male problems get dealt the same way any non chad male deals with any of their problems, they get fucked and suffer or they sui.

 

[Mainländer]

Male problems get dealt the same way any non chad male deals with any of their problems, they get fucked and suffer or they sui.

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8MO7fkZc5o

 

[Atavistic Autist]

Interesting. When I tried to put up a cool facade as a kid, I'd usually go for the laid-back badass type of behavior instead of the narcissist one.

My behavior was narcissistic at 10 years old because I was interacting with an imaginary friend in my mind who served to decrease my neuroticism and increase my conscientiousness. Those who go on to become full-fledged, pathological narcissists end up fusing with this very persona, becoming almost indistinguishable from their grandiose imaginary friend from childhood, although their True Selves remain underneath the surface and will come back into being given enough stress (a popular example is the "mid-life crisis").

This is why narcissism is said to stem from introversion -- because only lonely kids are prone to interact with imaginary friends like this. And it may also explain why women are said to be less narcissistic (and more BPD) than men, because they are frankly less lonely, and cannot sustain a grandiose self-image in their many interactions with others (especially sexual interactions, where they usually take on humiliating, submissive, and/or masochistic roles).

That doesn't sound very BPD, don't BPDs have shitty long term memory? It goes along with the lack of object constancy and the splitting shit they do, it would be difficult to split so brutally if you kept reminiscing about the loving phase of the relationship. Normal people have to "cool down" a bit before moving like that.

Pathological narcissists also have shitty memories, and it is for the same reason that those with BPD do. These two conditions share the same roots or etiology.

For example, Trump is often called stupid because of the very memory deficit that comes with BPD, and which those with pathological narcissism share.

BPD is the more fundamental condition, and pathological narcissism is an attempt to cope with it in childhood (when personality comes into formation), which in my case failed, sending me back into BPD-like behavior. You are right that I do not entirely resemble someone with BPD, though, and I personally consider myself on the spectrum between Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD), BPD, and Vulnerable Narcissism, which I suspect is quite typical for autists, inasmuch as I am a typical autist.

 

[Tenshi]

You mean by SUS?

Also, did it dimish your libido? Tbh I'm afraid of keeping my libido and just getting impotent, kek.

Yup.

It did, I barely even think about sex tbh and it made me act way more rational when dealing with women. It's actually the opposite (at least in my case afaik), my dick works normally I just don't crave for sex or even masturbation anymore.

 

[Mainländer]

My behavior was narcissistic at 10 years old because I was interacting with an imaginary friend in my mind who served to decrease my neuroticism and increase my conscientiousness. Those who go on to become full-fledged, pathological narcissists end up fusing with this very persona, becoming almost indistinguishable from their grandiose imaginary friend from childhood, although their True Selves remain underneath the surface and will come back into being given enough stress (a popular example is the "mid-life crisis").

I only had imaginary friends and lovers when I was really young, like until 6 or so.

This is why narcissism is said to stem from introversion -- because only lonely kids are prone to interact with imaginary friends like this. And it may also explain why women are said to be less narcissistic (and more BPD) than men, because they are frankly less lonely, and cannot sustain a grandiose self-image in their many interactions with others (especially sexual interactions, where they usually take on humiliating, submissive, and/or masochistic roles).

It's funny how many women brush inceldom aside as a non-issue but cannot stay alone/single for even a week. They monkeybranch instantly, and this isn't even only BPDs. They would probably rope within months in our skins.

Like you said in some past threads, those cluster B people, especially BPDs, really do suffer a lot, but it's mostly self-generated suffering (I mean, the original trauma that cause it is not their fault, but they are stuck in repetition cumpulsions and maladaptive copes after growing up). They should pursue treatment, but like I said earlier on this thread, women are social sponges so if society says the BPD maladaptive copes are healthy and positive, they'll believe it regardless of massive evidence that they won't ever feel happy and fulfilled living like that.

Pathological narcissists also have shitty memories, and it is for the same reason that those with BPD do. These two conditions share the same roots or etiology.

For example, Trump is often called stupid because of the very memory deficit that comes with BPD, and which those with pathological narcissism share.

BPD is the more fundamental condition, and pathological narcissism is an attempt to cope with it in childhood (when personality comes into formation), which in my case failed, sending me back into BPD-like behavior. You are right that I do not entirely resemble someone with BPD, though, and I personally consider myself on the spectrum between Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD), BPD, and Vulnerable Narcissism, which I suspect is quite typical for autists, inasmuch as I am a typical autist.

I'm also avoidant. My long term memory is good, I remember dialogues and conversations from years and years ago very well, if not verbatim, at least the meaning/general idea of what each person said. But my short-term memory is absolutely shitty due to ADHD, it's very common for me to go get something in a different room and when I get there I forget what I was supposed to do there.

Yup.

It did, I barely even think about sex tbh and it made me act way more rational when dealing with women. It's actually the opposite (at least in my case afaik), my dick works normally I just don't crave for sex or even masturbation anymore.

That's exactly what I'm looking for, thank you so much for telling me this. I'll try to persuade the psychiatrist to prescribe that to me, but I know how arrogant those doctors are, he probably won't listen to any suggestion or preference I have.