Brutal How do I stop dissapointing my mom? (Old niggas, help)

[glizzymcguire]

I'm 18 and turning 19 in less than 6 months and I haven't done anything that really seems worth any value. I'm truecel at 5'7, low dimorphism, and living in the hood/ghetto. I know I'll be alone probably forever but how do I make my situation better?

I want to get a job and finally move out of this place just so I don't bother her anymore. The only thing that I'm good at is music production but you know that'll get you no where these days cuz everyone thinks they're an artist but really they got no real talent or passion. Just normies taking up space and over saturating the industry.

I know she's dissapointed in me since she tells me she wants me out and how much fucked up stuff she's told me over the years since I was a kid. Which is probably deserved because I've been nothing but a burden to her.

Since I was 13 during the beginning of the pandemic, I've done nothing but rot alone. I dropped out of high school multiple times because mental stuff fucking me up almost turning schizo. (Too long to explain, I know you don't wanna read)

I gotta get my GED and all that to graduate firstly. But then I gotta find a way to wageslave without seeming like a damn retard in social interactions. I've been trying a lot but I still feel like an autist.

I grew up without a dad so I was never taught certain things. (I'm not talking about how to be a good respectable man, I'm never getting a girl so that doesn't matter)

I'm talking about fixing cars and appliances, driving, being independent, learning stuff about money, looks, how to act and man up. I don't know any of that.

I have some skills, I'm not retarded. But mentally I still feel like a 14 year old in the middle of a pandemic rotting in my room watching YouTube and being fat.

 

[Shark]

Dnr grAYnigger

 

[glizzymcguire]

This is the reality of black men who grow up with no father. I'm not violent or loud like most are, but I'm telling you this is how it really is. Especially for gen z men.

I wish more of these racists took this into consideration and try to see it from my perspective and get a glimpse into the real struggle

 

[Shark]

This is the reality of black men who grow up with no father. I'm not violent or loud like most are, but I'm telling you this is how it really is. Especially for gen z men.

I wish more of these racists took this into consideration and try to see it from my perspective and get a glimpse into the real struggle

Not sure how to help you tbh. Its simply over

 

[Divineone]

This is the reality of black men who grow up with no father. I'm not violent or loud like most are, but I'm telling you this is how it really is. Especially for gen z men.

I wish more of these racists took this into consideration and try to see it from my perspective and get a glimpse into the real struggle

 

[glizzymcguire]

Not sure how to help you tbh. Its simply over

Fr? Is it that bad?

 

[Divineone]

Fr? Is it that bad?

Nah..you are young.bruh..you got an entire life ahead.try to get a job first, like if you have a driving licence maybe you can do uber or food delivery (that's what I did when I was 20 or something)

 

[Leon98]

Dnr grAYnigger

 

[Ambatukam Alone]

One thing at a time, and you have write things down if you're thinking about more than two or three problems at once. Not in walls of text, of course, more mind maps/whatever makes sense for you. You said you have to graduate first, if that's true just focus on that at this stage. Separate the emotional/psychological stuff from the practical decisions. I can't stress enough how important it is that you actually write things down and think about one thing at a time, prioritize. I'm a fucked up loser, but I'm willing to try to give advice, if you want to correspond with me in this thread or in private conversation.

 

[glizzymcguire]

One thing at a time, and you have write things down if you're thinking about more than two or three problems at once. Not in walls of text, of course, more mind maps/whatever makes sense for you. You said you have to graduate first, if that's true just focus on that at this stage. Separate the emotional/psychological stuff from the practical decisions. I can't stress enough how important it is that you actually write things down and think about one thing at a time, prioritize. I'm a fucked up loser, but I'm willing to try to give advice, if you want to correspond with me in this thread or in private conversation.

Thank you bro

 

[kay']

Live for yourself not for your parents.

a grave mistake that destroyed my life.

 

[Jam]

Live for yourself not for your parents.

a grave mistake that destroyed my life.

 

[Todd Thundercock]

I would get your GED first because I assume that greatly limits you from getting many jobs.

Then work something you can tolerate, doesn't need to be full-time, get enough to move out. Build up savings and credit score.

A rare positive about being a lonely man is that life is still relatively cheap. But, it's hard to truly accept this.

 

[Genetics_subhuman]

Dnr grAYnigger

 

[eatdinner]

Fellow blackcel.

I dropped out of high school as well. I don’t know how the job market is nowadays but my first job was at a grocery store and I used that job experience as leverage to get other jobs.

Education is important. I hated school when I as a teenager but at 27 I now understand how important it is. You should definitely pursue it in your free time when you’re ready. You can only go so far with these unskilled labor jobs.

Your relationship with your mother is going to vastly improve once you move out. My mother used to talk to me like I was a slave. I moved out at 25 and it changed our relationship for the better.

Your young man. Life is long. Life is big, there are so many different possibilities good and bad, so many different lifestyles you can lead. It’s up to you to decide what you want do who you want to be. Don’t let your current situation overshadow your dreams, your wants. Those are what keep you going, like a slave that constantly dreams of freedom.

I’m a loser so I’m a little hesitant to give out advice but if there’s something specific you want to know I can try answering.

 

[TooSomething]

This is the reality of black men who grow up with no father. I'm not violent or loud like most are, but I'm telling you this is how it really is. Especially for gen z men.

I wish more of these racists took this into consideration and try to see it from my perspective and get a glimpse into the real struggle

I am a so called racist and I have been talking about this issue for years now, black kids growing up without a father.

Way too many for it to be a coincidence.

And it wasn't always like that in the USA in the black community.

To make you feel less shit. You can grow up with a father and still end up almost the same as it is in your case.

My father was always present, but either neglected me or half heartedly "tried" to teach me something.

Now I am 38 years old and he somehow tries to reconcile with me or some shit by STILL acting as though he genuinely wants to teach me something.

He also blames me for my failures although my failures are the direct result of his neglect as a father.

I am white / European, btw.

All my dad was ever good at was be a stingy motherfucker who was always worried more about me breaking stuff rather than learning something.
He also never wanted me to make mistakes, so whenever I did get a tool in my hand and was about to make mistakes he would pull the tool out of my hand and SCREAM at me from the top of his lungs telling me that I was holding it wrong, doing it wrong and that I was stupid and acting like a girl.

This is just a tiny example of all the shit I went through because of him.

Needless to say that I never really managed to get a proper job and career path.

All I can advice you is to look for good mentors / role models, regardless of where they are from and learn from them.

That will probably be difficult if you live in the hood.

The US is a wholly different animal.

Whatever the case, when it comes to a job, without having a profession, you will have to start small.

You are young, so you have that advantage. You will learn faster, anything.

Maybe get a licence as a forklift driver and maybe work your way up so you can drive the biggest ones.

But honestly, trades like welding pay very well.

It is a job that is more of an art than something repetitive.
That requires experience and you can only get that in the field.

Ask around, outside of the hood. Hell, even if you have to walk there.
When people see your dedication, they won't give a fuck about where you're from either.

I know because I have been there too.

And let me tell you, although I am white I too am not treated like one of them, here in Germany, because my passport says that I was born in another country.

It is what it is. People will always be suspicious of outsiders, regardless of their actual race and or religion.

Use the energy of your youth wisely, man.

If you have questions, regarding certain stuff, feel free to ask. I might be able to give advice.

As for the being a racist part. I am just a race realist and only against race mixing.

If you don't like that, that's fine. Still, I am willing to help and listen.

 

[glizzymcguire]

Fellow blackcel.

I dropped out of high school as well. I don’t know how the job market is nowadays but my first job was at a grocery store and I used that job experience as leverage to get other jobs.

Education is important. I hated school when I as a teenager but at 27 I now understand how important it is. You should definitely pursue it in your free time when you’re ready. You can only go so far with these unskilled labor jobs.

Your relationship with your mother is going to vastly improve once you move out. My mother used to talk to me like I was a slave. I moved out at 25 and it changed our relationship for the better.

Your young man. Life is long. Life is big, there are so many different possibilities good and bad, so many different lifestyles you can lead. It’s up to you to decide what you want do who you want to be. Don’t let your current situation overshadow your dreams, your wants. Those are what keep you going, like a slave that constantly dreams of freedom.

I’m a loser so I’m a little hesitant to give out advice but if there’s something specific you want to know I can try answering.

Thanks appreciate you gng

 

[hikkicel]

Buddy boyo, while inappropriately touching you through the screen while sincerely having the best intention, I’ll inform u that ur mom - the very being that created ur sub5 black ass in the hood, one of the worst and most annoying spawn points of all - should be the very last person to satisfy. The most tremendous nigger-ish mistake is to per se assume that ur mom (or anyone in ur family/closer circle if u have one) is someone worth ur attention and consideration; she could’ve aborted ur black ass (and if we’re all honest to ourselves, most of us wouldn’t want to be born anyways if we were asked prior birth), and all of ur problems wouldn’t have existed in the first place - Rather, see her as a source of failed (prior) parenting who fucked some nigga who went for milk like 8/10 black homes in the US. Though, you shouldn’t necessarily hate her or have hard feelings for her continuation of misery, of course, but get lowkey with being a mamas boy…

I’m not saying u shouldn’t do something remotely productive (GED, community college, bare minimum socializing etc…), but the first step is to consciously do it for YOURSELF, not for ur fucking mom, nor for a bipolar overweight negress you desperately will want to fuck in the future, hypothetically.

 

[Emba]

All you seem to have under you're belt is "music production" (probably mixing shit on a computer?) If you exspect to live off that you need to get paid.

Find a work area, find customers that will PAY you upfront for you're work! Get a rep as a solid dude. Maybe get a website or something to show potential clients.

As for being a musician (rapper! Lol!) Yourself, forget it. Only jew puppets get that dance....

Forget the GED, it's a joke these days unless you want college which is a joke too.

Read "the 50th law of power" (by, 50¢) to understand business from a black perspective.

As an American nigger you'll be doomed if you stay in the hood. Unless you can "get a crew" to have you're back! (As if);

Find a need that no one else is doing, and do it. It can be anything, as long as someone will pay for it.

Handyman is usually a needed task. If you can't fix it, then simply learn how! You are holding a library of knowledge under you're fingers. Use it.

Or paint? Thats a good gig with a low cost for starting tools.... Find a need, then fill it.

 

[Wok22]

Fr? Is it that bad?

No. It can only get worse if you give up. You have to start from somewhere, and you should first get your GED like everyone else is telling you, and that sounds simple, but it is going to be hard. Try to make friends with poeple who are trying to get a GED and they might have a similar struggle as you. I met people in college with a similar struggle as mine, and we got along. You will make it, brocel, just find someone other than your mom to support you.

 

[Pikacel]

He also never wanted me to make mistakes, so whenever I did get a tool in my hand and was about to make mistakes he would pull the tool out of my hand and SCREAM at me from the top of his lungs telling me that I was holding it wrong, doing it wrong and that I was stupid and acting like a girl.

Legit real

 

[Pikacel]

Buddy boyo, while inappropriately touching you through the screen while sincerely having the best intention, I’ll inform u that ur mom - the very being that created ur sub5 black ass in the hood, one of the worst and most annoying spawn points of all - should be the very last person to satisfy. The most tremendous nigger-ish mistake is to per se assume that ur mom (or anyone in ur family/closer circle if u have one) is someone worth ur attention and consideration; she could’ve aborted ur black ass (and if we’re all honest to ourselves, most of us wouldn’t want to be born anyways if we were asked prior birth), and all of ur problems wouldn’t have existed in the first place - Rather, see her as a source of failed (prior) parenting who fucked some nigga who went for milk like 8/10 black homes in the US. Though, you shouldn’t necessarily hate her or have hard feelings for her continuation of misery, of course, but get lowkey with being a mamas boy…

I’m not saying u shouldn’t do something remotely productive (GED, community college, bare minimum socializing etc…), but the first step is to consciously do it for YOURSELF, not for ur fucking mom, nor for a bipolar overweight negress you desperately will want to fuck in the future, hypothetically.

It’s weird as well. Why does some delinquent coalburner single mom deserve an overachieving son

 

[glizzymcguire]

It’s weird as well. Why does some delinquent coalburner single mom deserve an overachieving son

I've always wanted to be the best since I was the oldest and the closest thing to a father figure for my half siblings. I hated the feeling of growing up to be a loser without even realizing and knowing I now dossappint her even with years worth of effort to be the best in everything I could