SuicideFuel Got drunk while sleep depraved

[bigantennaemay1]

Was having a good time, watching Futurama again, drinking, eating some chicken, laughing it up by myself, as always. Now I'm depressed again. Why am I incapable of staying in a good, upbeat mood for more than a few hours at a time? Why am I completely incapable while sober?

I'm a fucking loser, and I hate it. And I hate that I can do nothing about it. I made so much effort to blend in, act normal, be normal, fit in with other people. I overcame so much shit with my autism, just so I could hope to live a normal life. And it was all for naught. I put so much effort in, but I may as well have done nothing, for all the good it did, for all the positive change it brought about (none). I hate existing.

I hate existing.

 

[HighTGymcel]

I hate existing.

Over for Existentialismcels

 

[Emba]

Brutal deprivationpill

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Over for Existentialismcels

Yeah.

Brutal deprivationpill

Yeah, I had to pull an all-nighter the previous night to get all my homework done on time. I'm still feeling the effects of it today.

 

[BornToLose]

The best thing about being sober is that you can bring it to an end any time of your choosing.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

The best thing about being sober is that you can bring it to an end any time of your choosing.

Yeah, if you can afford to.

 

[coping_manlet]

Yeah, if you can afford to

I couldn’t imagine not being able to afford my copes

 

[BornToLose]

Yeah, if you can afford to.

It's true tbf, I can't always (on NEETbuxx).

 

[nice_try]

Was having a good time, watching Futurama again, drinking, eating some chicken, laughing it up by myself, as always. Now I'm depressed again. Why am I incapable of staying in a good, upbeat mood for more than a few hours at a time? Why am I completely incapable while sober?

I'm a fucking loser, and I hate it. And I hate that I can do nothing about it. I made so much effort to blend in, act normal, be normal, fit in with other people. I overcame so much shit with my autism, just so I could hope to live a normal life. And it was all for naught. I put so much effort in, but I may as well have done nothing, for all the good it did, for all the positive change it brought about (none). I hate existing.

I hate existing.

This is literally me.
You have to be careful with the drinking bro, it can fuck you up badly. It helps for a few hours but the drawbacks are brutal.
Try to get more sleep, a better sleep shedule, go out and get some fresh air regularly, supplement vitamin D and zinc.