Melancholy_Worm
Banned
-
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2018
- Posts
- 240
Although my situation is quite light compared to others I've seen on this website, I still feel like I have to let out those feelings somewhere.
I am almost 18, my grades are quite good even though I don't invest too much time in studying, I tried to find as many hobbies as I could, running, reading and various video games (which is quite hard since my PS4 and gaming PC are broken so I mostly play shitty strategy games on my browser and some card games), but I just can't escape thoughts of suicide. I try really hard to ignore it and fill my head with other things but I just cant escape these thoughts as they get stronger each time. I never got laid, and never will, because I am an average 4.5/10 guy with terrible social anxiety. People say there is more to life, and that it is possible to "cope" with this void inside of me (perhaps by earning money). But I don't want to "COPE"! I want to live a normal life, even though it means being a bloody sheep, I rather be retarded and happy than be in my current state. How do you keep going? why do you keep going?
I am almost 18, my grades are quite good even though I don't invest too much time in studying, I tried to find as many hobbies as I could, running, reading and various video games (which is quite hard since my PS4 and gaming PC are broken so I mostly play shitty strategy games on my browser and some card games), but I just can't escape thoughts of suicide. I try really hard to ignore it and fill my head with other things but I just cant escape these thoughts as they get stronger each time. I never got laid, and never will, because I am an average 4.5/10 guy with terrible social anxiety. People say there is more to life, and that it is possible to "cope" with this void inside of me (perhaps by earning money). But I don't want to "COPE"! I want to live a normal life, even though it means being a bloody sheep, I rather be retarded and happy than be in my current state. How do you keep going? why do you keep going?