Discussion Brother (7) is reason I live and already has suicidal thoughts need help

[HyperboreanCavalier]

Does anyone else have a younger brother who keeps them around? I find one of the few reasons I stay near my dead end town is to give my brother (7) a good paternal figure. Our father committed suicide a few years ago, and my brother has obviously been seriously affected by it. Even before our fathers passing we were especially close but he is the only person I actually care about and really talk to and so it affects me when he is already suicidal and self-loathing (he often makes comments about how he is stupid and hates himself and wants to die). I make sure to stop by at least once a week to play with him, I try for as many times as possible to make him feel someone cares. My plan was to join the army and get as far away as possible, but that proved harder than I expected due to having to leave my brother and those plans fell through. But does anyone else have a similar thing with a younger sibling? Interested to hear your stories. Also if anyone has a background or experience in dealing with suicidal thoughts and depression in someone so young I'd like to hear advice about how to help him, because I am emotionally inept.

 

[mrlunatic]

Give him all the love he needs. Protect him from all the abuse in the world. Get him into a hobby that will help give meaning to his life.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

Give him all the love he needs. Protect him from all the abuse in the world. Get him into a hobby that will help give meaning to his life.

I try, but its very hard to protect him from abuse when our family is very crass and well, you know how school is... As for hobbies he is currently in soccer and I do all my hobbies with him, we play split screen co-op (sadly limits us to old games as for some reason they decided to discontinue split screen in new games) and he makes and helps me paint miniature soldiers I collect, I don't mind if his are a bit low quality because he's having fun. Do you recommend any specific hobbies?

 

[chudt320]

You should be there for him

I recommend signing him up to a martial arts like wresting, judo, boxing, it will really help him

 

[mrlunatic]

I try, but its very hard to protect him from abuse when our family is very crass and well, you know how school is... As for hobbies he is currently in soccer and I do all my hobbies with him, we play split screen co-op (sadly limits us to old games as for some reason they decided to discontinue split screen in new games) and he makes and helps me paint miniature soldiers I collect, I don't mind if his are a bit low quality because he's having fun. Do you recommend any specific hobbies?

Soccer is already a good hobby. Playing an instrument like guitar, etc. also comes to my mind

Whatever he does, make him do it seriously. That way it will help genuinely give him a coping mechanism.

And if you can't stop the abuse , teach him to recognise that none of this is his fault.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

Soccer is already a good hobby. Playing an instrument like guitar, etc. also comes to my mind

Whatever he does, make him do it seriously. That way it will help genuinely give him a coping mechanism.

And if you can't stop the abuse , teach him to recognise that none of this is his fault.

alright, I know how to play banjo and piano so I'll try to teach him which of them he wants to learn

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

You should be there for him

I recommend signing him up to a martial arts like wresting, judo, boxing, it will really help him

Do they do boys so young in martial arts? If they do I'll sign him up for that as well

 

[tired as fuck]

I began having suicidal thoughts when I was 11-12 or so. I don't know about kids as young as 7 but perhaps just listening to his thoughts or getting them to vomit his emotions out can help.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

I began having suicidal thoughts when I was 11-12 or so. I don't know about kids as young as 7 but perhaps just listening to his thoughts or getting them to vomit his emotions out can help.

I'll try that, I generally just listen because I don't know what to say, but how do I get him to vomit his emotions out?

 

[tired as fuck]

I'll try that, I generally just listen because I don't know what to say, but how do I get him to vomit his emotions out?

see that is the hard part, cuz that never happened with me.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

see that is the hard part, cuz that never happened with me.

I'll have to figure it out then, neither me nor anyone in my family actually talks about emotions so I also got no one trying to see what I felt. Which I prefer but I know its not best for everyone

 

[tired as fuck]

I'll have to figure it out then, neither me nor anyone in my family actually talks about emotions so I also got no one trying to see what I felt. Which I prefer but I know its not best for everyone

it's probably less than ideal to not talk about emotions in the family, my family is the same and, well, previous message happened.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

it's probably less than ideal to not talk about emotions in the family, my family is the same and, well, previous message happened.

I agree, due to the fact that people like myself uncomfortable with emotions will just be uncomfortable when talking about them but those who need to express their emotions will rope otherwise, I just don't know how to bring it up with my brother

 

[PTSD Marsupials]

You should keep him busy as much as possible, don't let his bad thoughts fester. What does he like to do?

 

[tired as fuck]

I agree, due to the fact that people like myself uncomfortable with emotions will just be uncomfortable when talking about them but those who need to express their emotions will rope otherwise, I just don't know how to bring it up with my brother

perhaps bonding through a shared interest for a start?

or if you don't share any, try to bridge the gap and get into one of his hobbies.

7 is a brutal age for suicidal ideation cuz how the fuck do you talk about that shit to a 7 year old? I'm legit at a loss.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

You should keep him busy as much as possible, don't let his bad thoughts fester. What does he like to do?

He likes to play cod zombies and just general outside stuff. He pretty much enjoys anything I do, I think its because he likes me. I try to do as much stuff with him as I can

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

perhaps bonding through a shared interest for a start?

or if you don't share any, try to bridge the gap and get into one of his hobbies.

7 is a brutal age for suicidal ideation cuz how the fuck do you talk about that shit to a 7 year old? I'm legit at a loss.

yeah... I play games with him both outside and online, and he joins me in my hobbies. But I agree 7 is a brutal age to already be suicidal, he had to face death so young it really breaks my heart that a happy childhood was robbed from him

 

[tired as fuck]

yeah... I play games with him both outside and online, and he joins me in my hobbies. But I agree 7 is a brutal age to already be suicidal, he had to face death so young it really breaks my heart that a happy childhood was robbed from him

I don't mean to sound overly corny but it's admirable that you want to still give him some semblance of a happy life.

 

[PTSD Marsupials]

He likes to play cod zombies and just general outside stuff. He pretty much enjoys anything I do, I think its because he likes me. I try to do as much stuff with him as I can

Having to face your father dying at that age is extremely brutal. I hope you're ok too OP.

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

I don't mean to sound overly corny but it's admirable that you want to still give him some semblance of a happy life.

Thank you, I mean my life was pretty shit and I'm trying to make sure he doesn't have to go through the same ringer of bullying I did (he is also autistic and ADHD ontop of this early depression), and if he does I'll be here for him having experienced the same stuff

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

Having to face your father dying at that age is extremely brutal. I hope you're ok too OP.

I'm fine as I can be and someone in the households gotta be, when I still lived at home my mum just cried all the time, I could just hear her and I don't know if she still does but someones gotta be there for my brother

 

[tired as fuck]

Thank you, I mean my life was pretty shit and I'm trying to make sure he doesn't have to go through the same ringer of bullying I did (he is also autistic and ADHD), and if he does I'll be here for him having experienced the same stuff

best of luck to the both of you man

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

best of luck to the both of you man

thanks

 

[PTSD Marsupials]

I'm fine as I can be and someone in the households gotta be, when I still lived at home my mum just cried all the time, I could just hear her and I don't know if she still does but someones gotta be there for my brother

I hope it gets better for you both

 

[HyperboreanCavalier]

I hope it gets better for you both

Well I mean I doubt its getting better for me, but as for my brother I'm trying everything I can to make his shitty childhood a little better

 

[chudt320]

Do they do boys so young in martial arts? If they do I'll sign him up for that as well

Yes they do, if they dont, sign him up for a sport for now until hes of age