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It's Over All i ever wanted was human warmth

bob-loblaw

bob-loblaw

dm me if you wanna move to rural montana
Joined
Dec 5, 2020
Posts
58
All i have needed was the warmth of another human body next to me. For years, I have been deprived of the warmth of another human being. Up until now, I have made up the gap with a dense pillow, but pillows are cold and motionless. Fantasy only goes so far, and the pillow can't touch you back. Even hugging family members is brief. My brother hates my guts and treats me like an annoying coworker. My parents and I always get into squabbles over unimportant things. I don't even care for sex -- if I wanted to coom, I would just look at porn like I have for over a decade. What I seek should not be rare -- simple, compassionate, platonic human contact beyond a brief handshakes. I've heard that in developing countries, friends have lots of platonic physical contact -- the type that would raise suspicions of homosexuality in the US.

All i want is someone who will hug me back as hard as I hug them.

Earlier this week i misread some physical signals from a close friend (+roommate) and hugged him for a bit longer and closer than I should have. I thought I had finally found someone who didn't find me absolutely repulsive, and the decade of isolation would finally come to an end. I guess I was wrong, and he must have been really put off by it. Despite living together, we haven't made eye contact in days. He won't even respond to my apology messages. I feel nothing but regret, shame and self-disgust realizing that my complete lack of physical contact broke the floodgates and destroyed one of my only close friendships.

Anyone looking at my life superficially would think things are great. I'll graduate soon with a high GPA and no college debt. I have a well-paying job lined up in a beautiful city.

None of it matters when you know in your heart of hearts that people are repulsed at the very idea of making physical contact with you. None of it matters when the loneliness you hoped would be temporary becomes the status quo, and the world around you gets colder and colder. All of it will fall apart alongside your corrupting sanity as you starve of a basic physiological need.

I commiserate with this anon's post:

"Having sex" isn't enough -- any escortcel can tell you this. There is a deeper human connection that ought to be self-emergent, but has been plastered over with an LCD screens of superficiality. All of the soul -- the singing, joking, playfulness, awkwardness, purity -- of human relationships has been replaced by the most disgusting and vulgar parts.

I'm packing it in for the long haul. Guess I should have just been myself.
 
All i have needed was the warmth of another human body next to me. For years, I have been deprived of the warmth of another human being. Up until now, I have made up the gap with a dense pillow, but pillows are cold and motionless. Fantasy only goes so far, and the pillow can't touch you back. Even hugging family members is brief. My brother hates my guts and treats me like an annoying coworker. My parents and I always get into squabbles over unimportant things. I don't even care for sex -- if I wanted to coom, I would just look at porn like I have for over a decade. What I seek should not be rare -- simple, compassionate, platonic human contact beyond a brief handshakes. I've heard that in developing countries, friends have lots of platonic physical contact -- the type that would raise suspicions of homosexuality in the US.

All i want is someone who will hug me back as hard as I hug them.
Relatable. Well said man.


Earlier this week i misread some physical signals from a close friend (+roommate) and hugged him for a bit longer and closer than I should have. I thought I had finally found someone who didn't find me absolutely repulsive, and the decade of isolation would finally come to an end. I guess I was wrong, and he must have been really put off by it. Despite living together, we haven't made eye contact in days. He won't even respond to my apology messages. I feel nothing but regret, shame and self-disgust realizing that my complete lack of physical contact broke the floodgates and destroyed one of my only close friendships.
Meh - You are in the U.S? Every country founded by English, Irish, Scottish refugees is extremely uptight and any kind of bro love is "gay". Give your bro time to figure it out. And if he can't, fuck that guy.

Anyone looking at my life superficially would think things are great. I'll graduate soon with a high GPA and no college debt. I have a well-paying job lined up in a beautiful city.
Good job man! It's no substitute for sex and fulfillment, but coping with money and career is much better than coping with no money and no career.
None of it matters when you know in your heart of hearts that people are repulsed at the very idea of making physical contact with you.
"Having sex" isn't enough -- any escortcel can tell you this.
True that.
 
Meh - You are in the U.S? Every country founded by English, Irish, Scottish refugees is extremely uptight and any kind of bro love is "gay". Give your bro time to figure it out. And if he can't, fuck that guy.
I should specify that it was... a few minutes long and quite close. This isn't your run-of-the-mill "bro why did u hug me" kind of thing, so I'm not sure if it is even possible to recover. In my heart of hearts, I had no romantic intent -- I don't have any reason to believe I am a homosexual, and he has a girlfriend, but I'm sure he was thrown off guard by it. Even if we do get back on speaking terms, this will certainly put a damper on things.
Good job man! It's no substitute for sex and fulfillment, but coping with money and career is much better than coping with no money and no career.
I suppose. There have been brief moments where I've found success and personal fulfillment in my professional relationships and I could see a clear path forward. Unfortunately, this has aligned mainly with internships where most of my contact is with people at least 5 years older than myself and there are clear goals. Once I get back on campus, it is difficult to find solace in relationships that blur the lines between professional and personal.

I know that I have potential for strong professional success, but this requires the type of sustained confidence that KHV inceldom constantly preempts.
 
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I know that I have potential for strong professional success, but this requires the type of sustained confidence that KHV inceldom constantly preempts.
I think you might be pleasantly surprised- if you're good at doing the work your bosses will be happy, because that's what they care about. Like Mark Twain I can live for months on a good compliment, if it's a compliment from my boss that still counts.

I found university hell, because it's a marriage market for all the smartest and most beautiful people.
 
There is No humanness " in this world , your Just better then Others so everyone worships your very Ass , or you Dont.
 
Unironically take more showers, but with hot water. The warmth of the hot water makes up for the lack of human touch you experience. Obviously it's nowhere close to the real thing, but it is something
 
All i have needed was the warmth of another human body next to me. For years, I have been deprived of the warmth of another human being. Up until now, I have made up the gap with a dense pillow, but pillows are cold and motionless. Fantasy only goes so far, and the pillow can't touch you back. Even hugging family members is brief. My brother hates my guts and treats me like an annoying coworker. My parents and I always get into squabbles over unimportant things. I don't even care for sex -- if I wanted to coom, I would just look at porn like I have for over a decade. What I seek should not be rare -- simple, compassionate, platonic human contact beyond a brief handshakes. I've heard that in developing countries, friends have lots of platonic physical contact -- the type that would raise suspicions of homosexuality in the US.

All i want is someone who will hug me back as hard as I hug them.

Earlier this week i misread some physical signals from a close friend (+roommate) and hugged him for a bit longer and closer than I should have. I thought I had finally found someone who didn't find me absolutely repulsive, and the decade of isolation would finally come to an end. I guess I was wrong, and he must have been really put off by it. Despite living together, we haven't made eye contact in days. He won't even respond to my apology messages. I feel nothing but regret, shame and self-disgust realizing that my complete lack of physical contact broke the floodgates and destroyed one of my only close friendships.

Anyone looking at my life superficially would think things are great. I'll graduate soon with a high GPA and no college debt. I have a well-paying job lined up in a beautiful city.

None of it matters when you know in your heart of hearts that people are repulsed at the very idea of making physical contact with you. None of it matters when the loneliness you hoped would be temporary becomes the status quo, and the world around you gets colder and colder. All of it will fall apart alongside your corrupting sanity as you starve of a basic physiological need.

I commiserate with this anon's post:

"Having sex" isn't enough -- any escortcel can tell you this. There is a deeper human connection that ought to be self-emergent, but has been plastered over with an LCD screens of superficiality. All of the soul -- the singing, joking, playfulness, awkwardness, purity -- of human relationships has been replaced by the most disgusting and vulgar parts.

I'm packing it in for the long haul. Guess I should have just been myself.
Whorecel here and can confirm, it's nothing. Craving affection and somebody who cares or even someone who will kiss you or hug you is what is imperative. Taking the whorepill actually makes you realize how lonely you actually are. It's not worth it.
 
All i have needed was the warmth of another human body next to me. For years, I have been deprived of the warmth of another human being. Up until now, I have made up the gap with a dense pillow, but pillows are cold and motionless. Fantasy only goes so far, and the pillow can't touch you back. Even hugging family members is brief. My brother hates my guts and treats me like an annoying coworker. My parents and I always get into squabbles over unimportant things. I don't even care for sex -- if I wanted to coom, I would just look at porn like I have for over a decade. What I seek should not be rare -- simple, compassionate, platonic human contact beyond a brief handshakes. I've heard that in developing countries, friends have lots of platonic physical contact -- the type that would raise suspicions of homosexuality in the US.

All i want is someone who will hug me back as hard as I hug them.

Earlier this week i misread some physical signals from a close friend (+roommate) and hugged him for a bit longer and closer than I should have. I thought I had finally found someone who didn't find me absolutely repulsive, and the decade of isolation would finally come to an end. I guess I was wrong, and he must have been really put off by it. Despite living together, we haven't made eye contact in days. He won't even respond to my apology messages. I feel nothing but regret, shame and self-disgust realizing that my complete lack of physical contact broke the floodgates and destroyed one of my only close friendships.

Anyone looking at my life superficially would think things are great. I'll graduate soon with a high GPA and no college debt. I have a well-paying job lined up in a beautiful city.

None of it matters when you know in your heart of hearts that people are repulsed at the very idea of making physical contact with you. None of it matters when the loneliness you hoped would be temporary becomes the status quo, and the world around you gets colder and colder. All of it will fall apart alongside your corrupting sanity as you starve of a basic physiological need.

I commiserate with this anon's post:

"Having sex" isn't enough -- any escortcel can tell you this. There is a deeper human connection that ought to be self-emergent, but has been plastered over with an LCD screens of superficiality. All of the soul -- the singing, joking, playfulness, awkwardness, purity -- of human relationships has been replaced by the most disgusting and vulgar parts.

I'm packing it in for the long haul. Guess I should have just been myself.
I hate everyone and everything, I don't want human affection i don't even think i have empathy anymore after taking too much blackpill and getting guilttripped by everyone to shove bluepill in my mouth
 
yeah I also want someone to touch me, prostitutes dont touch you, they just lay there and you touch them, ofc for more money the illusion would be better
they do everything they can to get more money
or should I say "not doing"
 
Same, I just want a woman to hold, and to hold me. Holding a sex doll just doesn't do it, it's cold and stiff and lifeless. Like holding a corpse. :feelsbadman::feelsbadman::feelsbadman:
 
I agree.

No 10/10 wants to give me warmth. Ever.

I'm too average-looking.
Saad
 

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