I was thinking about all my life up to now and I became sad. I am 22 and in university, and I work the weekend. I have to study, find a job, moneymaxx, sacrifice most of my free time to work hard to become independent and responsible. But how? I have lived in total isolation until now. I haven't experienced anything close to what other people did in their formative years. People my age are fine with working all day because they've already had all the carefree fun and sex they could when they were teen; I noticed that the foids especially are already satisfied and reached past that time when they were trying to have fun, now they are all so responsible and hard-working. I'm so angry at the people around me who can afford to work for their future because they are satisfied by their past. I'm not a kid anymore, I should've done these things years ago and now I can't catch up all at once. What I'm saying is that I haven't really lived a life up to now, yet I'm supposed to act as if I did. It really saddens me.
Is this a childish complaint? But isn't it unfair that we have the same duties and expectations as normies who have lived completely different lives from us? And even if I had the motivation, what could I possibly do? I haven't made connections and I haven't developed any kind of skill, plus I was already low IQ to begin with. The only thing I did was to study in high school, so I passed with a decent grade, but that alone won't get me any job. I don't have any kind of social experience, I barely know how to talk with other people. I can't become an adult when I haven't gone through my teens. I can already see myself at 30, when even the last hope I have now will be gone, trying to chat with teenager girls like an idiot to experience what I will have lost.
I don't see any future for me, to be honest. I have no past, no present, and if things don't change, no future. Best case scenario, things do change, I somehow manage to get a good job despite my situation, and then I can live the rest of my life as a bitter wageslave who lost his opportunity to have fun in his teens. Otherwise I'll keep barely making it working in fast food and live an even more miserable life until I rope. In both cases I'll be unhappy! My parents still tell me that I'm too young to be this negative, but I'm not so sure anymore. I'm not even sure I'm intelligent and mentally stable enough to finish this degree, which will be most likely useless for me either way.
Is this a childish complaint? But isn't it unfair that we have the same duties and expectations as normies who have lived completely different lives from us? And even if I had the motivation, what could I possibly do? I haven't made connections and I haven't developed any kind of skill, plus I was already low IQ to begin with. The only thing I did was to study in high school, so I passed with a decent grade, but that alone won't get me any job. I don't have any kind of social experience, I barely know how to talk with other people. I can't become an adult when I haven't gone through my teens. I can already see myself at 30, when even the last hope I have now will be gone, trying to chat with teenager girls like an idiot to experience what I will have lost.
I don't see any future for me, to be honest. I have no past, no present, and if things don't change, no future. Best case scenario, things do change, I somehow manage to get a good job despite my situation, and then I can live the rest of my life as a bitter wageslave who lost his opportunity to have fun in his teens. Otherwise I'll keep barely making it working in fast food and live an even more miserable life until I rope. In both cases I'll be unhappy! My parents still tell me that I'm too young to be this negative, but I'm not so sure anymore. I'm not even sure I'm intelligent and mentally stable enough to finish this degree, which will be most likely useless for me either way.
