What's the worst thing that ever happened, while you gave a speech ?

[Norville Wood]

The last speech I gave......I decided right then......would be my last speech.

And it was.

I put some vodka in a sprite can, sipped, and somehow made it through. Frankly, I taught myself to breathe deep. That helped just enough.

I wonder if anyone's actually FEINTED. or shit themself.

 

[Kaichee]

No idea, but how good is your profile pic!!!!

 

[Norville Wood]

Can someone shop this into an incel kek broken blood vessels pic?

 

[Cryotron]

you mean speaking in front of an audience?

 

[Better Off Kanga]

When I was a senior in high school, my teacher made us each give a speech/oral presentation about a made-up job, we had worked, it was a dumb assignment.

I thought it would be funny during my speech to mention how drunk I was when I came into that job, I said something along the lines of

"thanks to Mr.Blank (my teacher) for not firing me for all the times I came in drunk to work.

absolute crickets, my teacher sighed and said "tough crowd" halfheartedly told me I'd get a "decent grade" or whatever and I just took my seat and imagined blowing my fucking head off.

Maybe not the worst thing, but it came to mind.

 

[Norville Wood]

When I was a senior in high school, my teacher made us each give a speech/oral presentation about a made-up job, we had worked, it was a dumb assignment.

I thought it would be funny during my speech to mention how drunk I was when I came into that job, I said something along the lines of

"thanks to Mr.Blank (my teacher) for not firing me for all the times I came in drunk to work.

absolute crickets, my teacher sighed and said "tough crowd" halfheartedly told me I'd get a "decent grade" or whatever and I just took my seat and imagined blowing my fucking head off.

Maybe not the worst thing, but it came to mind.

Actually that was a damn witty thing to say, and good writing and creativity.

Even the teacher recognized the ABSURD SATIRE.

 

[Better Off Kanga]

Actually that was a damn witty thing to say, and good writing and creativity.

Thanks, I thought so too, my oneitis was in the class at the time, I told her about it again later, and she laughed then but everyone in that class was dead, when I actually said it.
Moments like that, just made me keep my mouth shut nowadays, I'm the most reserved motherfucker in the world now.

 

[Lonelyus]

I got a boner but luckily i had a hoodie, I spotted a hot foid in the crowd, It was a mandatory speech at school everyone had to do it, FML!

 

[Norville Wood]

Thanks, I thought so too, my oneitis was in the class at the time, I told her about it again later, and she laughed then but everyone in that class was dead, when I actually said it.
Moments like that, just made me keep my mouth shut nowadays, I'm the most reserved motherfucker in the world now.

I actually laughed out loud.

Hypothetically, saying that in front of a class, at the teachers expense, was brilliant.

 

[Better Off Kanga]

I actually laughed out loud.

heh glad I could provide you one, the good Lord knows I could have used an audience like you in that class.

 

[Robb97]

When I was a senior in high school, my teacher made us each give a speech/oral presentation about a made-up job, we had worked, it was a dumb assignment.

I thought it would be funny during my speech to mention how drunk I was when I came into that job, I said something along the lines of

"thanks to Mr.Blank (my teacher) for not firing me for all the times I came in drunk to work.

absolute crickets, my teacher sighed and said "tough crowd" halfheartedly told me I'd get a "decent grade" or whatever and I just took my seat and imagined blowing my fucking head off.

Maybe not the worst thing, but it came to mind.

I think to make a funny joke you need to have social status + you need to actually be in a relaxed and fun mood yourself

 

[Better Off Kanga]

you need to actually be in a relaxed and fun mood yourself

This might be it, a guy once told me I come off really tense and reserved, even when trying to be outgoing it's really possible I was so nervous everyone could just sense it, and it encumbered any possibility of humor.