In regards to everything really, money is important, it's an inescapable fact. Getting work for me is hard, it takes me lots of time and effort and even then I can only get shitty low paid insecure jobs too. I'm judged so badly also by co-workers, the older I get the more is expected of me in my private life also, if I don't have proof of a gf/wife or kids from previous relationships I'm seen as some kind of fag, or a low-status joke to be bullied and laughed at. Now I'm NEET again and living with my mother who is nearly 80, it's not a good situation at all.
Stop the cycle of being in the house, in my room playing on my PC, phone, watching TV/movies that make me feel even worse about living as me 24/7.#
Masturbating so much, ageing hasn't helped much, I still feel the need and after 2.5 weeks [NoFap record] my right testicle was in severe pain and after nutting I felt immediately better.
To feel happier or at least content, I always feel on edge all the time, everything seems off and is off really, I'm trapped living where I am pretty much, nobody talks to me, except to shout abuse [like my neighbours - I don't know why, it's like with co-workers, they see you're alone and have nobody and alarm bells ring I think and speculation and rumours spread]
If just ONE woman gave me a chance, none of it would matter I would be happy, my sexual needs would be met, I could get a shitty job, be seen as a normie on the uglier side but treated with more respect at least. But that is proving impossible with how my life is as described above.
I don't see a way out, I can see why some people just flip out and I can see that as my future tbh, I have lots of pent up rage and once my mum dies I won't care about just going on a rampage and then ending it really. I want a happy ending though of course, but I'm not a youngcel who could be okay in a few years, so how the hell is that going to happen in any shape or form for me now?
Stop the cycle of being in the house, in my room playing on my PC, phone, watching TV/movies that make me feel even worse about living as me 24/7.#
Masturbating so much, ageing hasn't helped much, I still feel the need and after 2.5 weeks [NoFap record] my right testicle was in severe pain and after nutting I felt immediately better.
To feel happier or at least content, I always feel on edge all the time, everything seems off and is off really, I'm trapped living where I am pretty much, nobody talks to me, except to shout abuse [like my neighbours - I don't know why, it's like with co-workers, they see you're alone and have nobody and alarm bells ring I think and speculation and rumours spread]
If just ONE woman gave me a chance, none of it would matter I would be happy, my sexual needs would be met, I could get a shitty job, be seen as a normie on the uglier side but treated with more respect at least. But that is proving impossible with how my life is as described above.
I don't see a way out, I can see why some people just flip out and I can see that as my future tbh, I have lots of pent up rage and once my mum dies I won't care about just going on a rampage and then ending it really. I want a happy ending though of course, but I'm not a youngcel who could be okay in a few years, so how the hell is that going to happen in any shape or form for me now?
