Brutal. I do the same thing (just not in front of mirrors, kek). It's crazy to think that Chads are so busy actually living life that they don't ever do things like that.
I think this is actually true. It's artificial how shitty my life has become, to the degree that it has to be orchestrated by some kind of evil god/gods. For example, a few years ago I had no friends that lived in my own city (I had a few that lived hours away, but I rarely ever see them). Then one day I ran into an old friend of mine who still lives here, and we ended up hanging out again. I was excited to finally have a friend nearby that I could do stuff with irl, and then one day I heard the news that he committed suicide. It doesn't make sense at all since he wasn't suicidal or depressed, but yet it still happened. What are the fucking chances that this happens to my only irl friend that lives near me? It's like god/the universe is artificially conspiring to keep me alone in my room forever, trapped in a hellish existence.
I hate to say it, but I'm open to the possibility that that friend was never a real person and was only put into my life specifically to be taken away from me (as @SuperKanga.Belgrade was saying) in order to make me suffer