Where do I begin, their is sp much to rant about, that has FUCKED ME UP! I will start with discussing how I was getting used by family. I was placed in an apartment after living at my families home for too long without paying rent since I wasn't recieving money, and was fired recently. My parent thought that by moving me in an apartment with my uncle, it would force me to get a job and be life coached by my greedy uncle. Instead what happened was, I started working for my shitty uncle at his car dealership cleaning out cars in the hot sun everyday while he sits in his little air conditioned office most of the time. One of the worse parts is that I have not been paid for the entire 6 months I have been working here, I literally have not been paid 1 dollar. Whats even worse than that is the fact that my parent has been paying my rent and my uncles rent for the entire 6 months ive been at the apartment im staying in, and my uncle has not paid for gas, electricity, water, or put any money at all into the rent. while my uncle has me do free manual labor and makes plenty of money selling cars. My uncle was suppose to job coach me while we live in the same apartment but instead he just complains to me about not cleaning up small messes and getting up late for work, and then goes and tells my parent about how im not doing what im suppose to do. BULLSHIT; I call bullshit on that, im getting so fucking sick of this fucking nonsense im about to have a major fucking autistic meltdown like a rabid dog. Also in the past six months ive been at this new apartment I have not made a single new friend, despite interacting with people at the gym I go to. I have not found a single partner, and I have only been ridiculed by people for my performance. I did flight school training and couldn't even pass it. I have nothing to lose and nothing to gain anymore; I am so fucking sick of everything. I also did a legitimate (and expensive) IQ/Autism test recently and thr results showed that I had High Functioning Autism as expected, and also revealed that i had an iq of 90, which after finding out those results alone fucked me up bad. I recently almost did death by glowy, and also tried cutting into an artery but couldn't handle the pain, so I am not even good at dying either, FUCK. What am i suppose to do, what does god want from me, why must I suffer???
