For nearly a year I have been using alcohol (ethanol) as a sedative for my anger all because of girls, in the beginning I used it only a couple times a month when the anger was real bad but it´s just hard to ignore the anger especially when out grocery shopping even on that 1 hour walk I will see dozens of slutty girls wearing their yoga pants/tights and tight shirts they might as well be wearing body paint!
And in the summer it´s even worse when they start to strip down and show as much skin as possible in their small tops and hotpants they are just compelled to show as much skin to tease and provoke as many guys as possible, honestly I don´t know if I will survive this summer I was suppose to quit drinking and start tapering off benzos and since I haven´t left my appartment for the last 2 days I wasn´t angry but I had to do my laundry today and saw several slutty girls already starting to wear their hotpants showing their smooth legs for sexual validation so I gave in and bought some beer in which I saw more sluts.
So since the last year especially the last few months I have been drinking several times a week to hide my anger, it´s not that alcohol has made me more angry it´s the same as before the only difference is I use it as a sedative like any other drug people would use to calm them down, benzos are for my anxiety they don´t help on my anger at all I need to feel sedated in order not to be angry and all because of the sluttiness of girls and it was bad enough in the colder month but now it´s summer I don´t know if I will make it, how can my psychiatrist want me to quit using a drug (alcohol) which makes me less angry I don´t get it, but of course she shouldn´t know I am as angry as I am since I hide it inside for the most part, so to sum it up I have pretty much become an alcoholic just to ease my anger towards girls and also the world but that is for another topic.
And in the summer it´s even worse when they start to strip down and show as much skin as possible in their small tops and hotpants they are just compelled to show as much skin to tease and provoke as many guys as possible, honestly I don´t know if I will survive this summer I was suppose to quit drinking and start tapering off benzos and since I haven´t left my appartment for the last 2 days I wasn´t angry but I had to do my laundry today and saw several slutty girls already starting to wear their hotpants showing their smooth legs for sexual validation so I gave in and bought some beer in which I saw more sluts.
So since the last year especially the last few months I have been drinking several times a week to hide my anger, it´s not that alcohol has made me more angry it´s the same as before the only difference is I use it as a sedative like any other drug people would use to calm them down, benzos are for my anxiety they don´t help on my anger at all I need to feel sedated in order not to be angry and all because of the sluttiness of girls and it was bad enough in the colder month but now it´s summer I don´t know if I will make it, how can my psychiatrist want me to quit using a drug (alcohol) which makes me less angry I don´t get it, but of course she shouldn´t know I am as angry as I am since I hide it inside for the most part, so to sum it up I have pretty much become an alcoholic just to ease my anger towards girls and also the world but that is for another topic.
