I just wrote that for fun because it leads up to the part "I can´t stop this feeling anymore etc."
Especially because I am also on benzos so since that I am addicted to benzos and both benzodiazepines and ethanol both affects the GABA receptors so it´s hard to tell which urge or withdrawal I am feeling like if I haven´t taken a benzo for many hours am I feeling the urge to drink or just need a benzo? I also suffer from extreme apathy and anhedonia so I have no hobbies left, back when I quit weed I replaced it with bodybuilding I can´t do that now because of my back injury if I had hopes and dreams it would be much easier to kick the habit since there would be a goal a reward to look forward to.
Maybe going on bike rides wouldn´t affect my back injury; it´s in the middle of the spine so I can´t even run without it hurting it´s I really hate bike rides I prefer running but I can´t.
I doubt that will help reminds me of harry potter lol. Also I am allergic to milk so I can´t eat chocolate.
Btw thanks.
I can´t get codeine and opiates like heroin or oxycodone only gives me anxiety I get anxiety from almost all drugs even cigarettes if I am not drunk I didn´t use to (the cigarette anxiety) but my adult "life" had crippled me in so many ways beyond imagining.
puke is cristal clear vodka he either didnt ate (because spends all on alcohol) or alcoholism already altered his biology
I am not criticizing him I mean it´s clear he only puked clean vodka I even wondered if they could set it on fire since there were no vomit only very pure alcohol, and he downed 3 bottles that is insane even if it was just filled with water his stomach had to be expanded to hold that much in without puking like competetive eaters.
This is usually the easiest method but I have a throat problem my main reason for wanting to rope and porn bareable gives any satisfaction anymore I have to watch insane shit to get off which I will not disclose here it´s vile. and I get anxiety from any other drugs even heroin, oxycodone, weed, or even cigarettes when I am not drunk.
That sucks don´t you have a trashcan nearby? When I occasionally puke I have a trashcan right next to me.
I didnt know i was gonna puke tbh i just started chugging water
Tbh I actually don´t drink every day usually "only" every other day and 11 beers but it has gone on for months so I consider it an addiction.
You´re the Sith lord!
Good song
Yeah I get what you are coming from but the employees don´t say anything or give me weird looks but it have occured to me when the same cashier rings has served me several times that week.
No I am allergic to almost everything and incense also makes my throat problem worse, but I do like being out in nature despite as an adult being allergic to almost everything so it bothers my throat and eyes and I will sneeze a lot.
I am sick of society too but mostly I am sick of these broken body I am in and on monday I will have to start tapering off benzos and alcohol for what? I have no dream to pursue anymore and as that wasn´t enough it´s summer and hot as shit and my ventilator is broken so it´s even hotter and I get extremely angry when it´s too hot and also angry at the fact that other people love it what the fuck do they love about sweating like a pig in extreme heat while having to keep washing your clothes!? And I usually don´t sweat at all so it´s not because I sweat a lot only in extreme heat like anyone else.
