What happened? It feels like nothing has changed since my early teens. I am still the same person I was, I have not grown up as the said I would and I still have not managed to get close enough to a female to even smell her pheromones.
Why am I alone? I did everything they told me to do, sure I am a very nervous guy and I am sure that comes across but they won't even engage with me they just give me that look or they just talk to me about rubbish for a while, while seeming disinterested the whole time. I know, I am not a good looking guy but I never thought women's standards would be so high as to cut a pretty meh guy like me out of the party.
Is it my personality? I know I tend to drone on about history and politics but it's not like I am stuttering or having long periods of silence in the conversations I have with people. Sure I tend to want to talk about things other people don't want to. But why can't we find a middle ground of things we are both interested in?
Is it how I look? am I ugly? I know my chin is pretty recessed and i've got large ears but are women really that shallow?
Why can't I grow up? I still feel like a child walking around watching adults do things without any comprehension of how they do it. everytime I try do somthing "adults" do I always seem to fail. I got kicked out of the course I was doing, I have no social life, I failed my driving test multiple times, I have never been to a party and I have never had a relationship.
I'm sitting here alone on my birthday with only the knowledge that I am a year closer to dying alone and I can't seem to do anything to stop it from happening. Fuck.
Why am I alone? I did everything they told me to do, sure I am a very nervous guy and I am sure that comes across but they won't even engage with me they just give me that look or they just talk to me about rubbish for a while, while seeming disinterested the whole time. I know, I am not a good looking guy but I never thought women's standards would be so high as to cut a pretty meh guy like me out of the party.
Is it my personality? I know I tend to drone on about history and politics but it's not like I am stuttering or having long periods of silence in the conversations I have with people. Sure I tend to want to talk about things other people don't want to. But why can't we find a middle ground of things we are both interested in?
Is it how I look? am I ugly? I know my chin is pretty recessed and i've got large ears but are women really that shallow?
Why can't I grow up? I still feel like a child walking around watching adults do things without any comprehension of how they do it. everytime I try do somthing "adults" do I always seem to fail. I got kicked out of the course I was doing, I have no social life, I failed my driving test multiple times, I have never been to a party and I have never had a relationship.
I'm sitting here alone on my birthday with only the knowledge that I am a year closer to dying alone and I can't seem to do anything to stop it from happening. Fuck.
