When I was at my last university I almost killed myself from going to the gym. It was brutal. I was in a mostly white jock university town. Every guy was fucking massive and tall and built. Good faces all around. Buff. Some roid monsters.
All the girls were beautiful slim white Stacys in tight spandex. All of them would remain at least 2 machine distances away from me at all times.
I'm short, ethnic, scrawny, and deformed.
It's honestly bad enough looking into a mirror for an hour with no one else around. But looking into a mirror when you're surrounded by all these people that are so perfect was horrible. I was going 2-3x/week. It was literally one of the more traumatic things I've done in the past few years. By the end, I was coming home each time almost in tears at the futility of my life.
I eventually realized it was killing me and I couldn't keep doing it, so I just switched to doing pushups and some dumbell weights at home.
I haven't been back to a gym in 3 years since then. I don't intend to go back to one either. Unless maybe I get my jaws redone first.
If you're legit gutter tier like me, you have to reduce the amount of time you're forced to directly compare yourself to others. Ie. Avoid gyms at all costs, unless perhaps they're old people gyms.
