"This guy was actually X, so he doesn't DESERVE my empathy/pity""GIVING my prayers towards X!! That's so heccin heartbreaking!!""I give used to GIVE them pity/empathy until they've done YZ!!""They need to be GIVEN support""I want to GIVE her comfort!!"It's almost like you're passing background checks for an interview so they can get you a job and give you pay later on.
"Oh, this person was actually X? Well I TAKE BACK my condolences!"If you don't pass as a member of a tribe or posses some "inexcusable" traits, you're practically less than a human in their eyes. Like take any social media drama for example. The person in question could go through every worst event in their lives, suffer tremendously for nothing, but the second they go against the narrative, or even sprout something "controversial", suddenly they don't feel bad for them anyone and take back everything they've said.
The best example I could think off is "Never give up" guy. He would went about his experiences, often walking on eggshells to not piss off the normies and they would GIVE him condolences, sympathy, pity, whatnot. Fast forward few years later and he's married, expecting a baby. He makes a video on how men are discriminated and how fathers like him weren't even accounted for in a conversation, and suddenly all of them turn on him and take back everything they've said about him. Suddenly they don't feel bad about him anymore and start implying he DESERVED to end up like this.
It's all so tribal. You can hate people but understand or even somewhat feel for what they've gone through without needing to make it about whether they've "deserved" to be felt bad for.
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