From when I first started junion HIgh School, the hot girls began to cruelly joke with me that they liked me, with clear sarcastic tones while getting a laugh from the classroom and chads. In some ways, this was worse than the bullying I suffered at the hands of the actual chads. This completely destroyed my social skills to interact with females,I had little way to know if a girl was geniunely interested in me because that bullying made it very hard to identify if it was true or not. They also sexually teased me in front of everyone just to get a reaction from me and laugh, if I didn't reacted they laughed at my stoic response, if I reacted they laughed at my reaction. Thanks to this, the actual good shot I had in my last year of junior high, when I became buffed because my dad forced me to take a fitness course, were dumped to the trash. I also remember a day when I looked at a cute girl younger than me with beautiful blue eyes, I didn't even talked to her and her response was aggressively shout at me "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?!". That was very painful.
However to this day I still remember one of the most brutal part, it happened in High School proper. Now my fellows, one thing is when popular girls picked up on me for social points, to make their chad boys laugh, for fun, or at the command of their chad boyfriends. They are doing it in front of me to get something out of me. Is there anything more brutal than that? Sure is. There was a cuteish girl that was some years my junior, I never interacted with her in any significant capacity. Our class was taken to the outdoors tables for assignments, and you can imagine my surprise when I found "Cuteishgirl X My nickname" engraved in it. No one noticed it, no one commented on it, not even the bullies, so I know they didn't wrote it. It wasn't either written strongly with ink to make it noticeable, it wasn't aimed at me, it was aimed at her, to get a reaction out of her, likely either a laugh or an "eww" type of response.
This means that behind my back and without me knowing, people were messing with the cuteish girl with the prospect of dating me, the prospect of dating me became a joke, a boogeyman, not even to pick up on me or to get a reaction out of me like the bullies, but likely to get a reaction out of her because of how horrifying or "funny" the concept of dating me was. I remember that day still and I remember all those subsequent days I went to the outdoor tables and saw that engraved, the only way I could cope was to hope that she actually liked me and she wrote it or that her friends did to positively pick up on her, to this day I still do, because the alternative is terrible.
However to this day I still remember one of the most brutal part, it happened in High School proper. Now my fellows, one thing is when popular girls picked up on me for social points, to make their chad boys laugh, for fun, or at the command of their chad boyfriends. They are doing it in front of me to get something out of me. Is there anything more brutal than that? Sure is. There was a cuteish girl that was some years my junior, I never interacted with her in any significant capacity. Our class was taken to the outdoors tables for assignments, and you can imagine my surprise when I found "Cuteishgirl X My nickname" engraved in it. No one noticed it, no one commented on it, not even the bullies, so I know they didn't wrote it. It wasn't either written strongly with ink to make it noticeable, it wasn't aimed at me, it was aimed at her, to get a reaction out of her, likely either a laugh or an "eww" type of response.
This means that behind my back and without me knowing, people were messing with the cuteish girl with the prospect of dating me, the prospect of dating me became a joke, a boogeyman, not even to pick up on me or to get a reaction out of me like the bullies, but likely to get a reaction out of her because of how horrifying or "funny" the concept of dating me was. I remember that day still and I remember all those subsequent days I went to the outdoor tables and saw that engraved, the only way I could cope was to hope that she actually liked me and she wrote it or that her friends did to positively pick up on her, to this day I still do, because the alternative is terrible.
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Im sorry you had to go through that
