SUPER DUPER DEPRESSED

[Sub8Hate]

Anyone else in the same boat?

I've been hardcore depressed for the last couple of weeks. Just now I had to tell myself not to cry like a little bitch, as I just got that feeling, hard. 

I should probably get more sleep and stop waking and baking.

 

[nausea]

SUPER DUPER MART

[video=youtube]http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tbUOw2t3pQ[/video]

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Just now I had to tell myself not to cry like a little bitch, as I just got that feeling, hard. 

can you elab? any particular reason? triggered?

 

[josh]

I've had depression for like 3 years, kek.
I think about suicide everyday multiple times a day but I don't have the willpower to do it so I just LDAR.

 

[Sub8Hate]

SUPER DUPER MART

[video=youtube]http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tbUOw2t3pQ[/video]

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can you elab? any particular reason? triggered?

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Just general depression, I get random urges to cry. Nothing has triggered me specifically. I think it's because I'm smoking too much weed, for the most part. And of course cause I'm ugly and am not getting any strange. Reading threads here isn't so helpful for it, either. KEK. 

I'm just depressed af. Feeling OK right now, however.

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I've had depression for like 3 years, kek.
I think about suicide everyday multiple times a day but I don't have the willpower to do it so I just LDAR.

I've been rotting with depression since '99. It's technically bipolar / mood disorder, but didn't find out until I was prescribed an SSRI, went a little looney tunes, and ended up in the psych ward.

Man, I fucking hate the ward. Good government cheese sandwiches, though.

 

[nausea]

I get random urges to cry

I stopped crying years ago, I went to a point of everyday crying plus literally laying down on the floor in darkness

I endured this for MONTHS

It all blew up with my 2nd attempt

but even after all this, depression is around the corner: if I stop the drugs I am fucked for sure

it's my real life experience that must improve or what the fuck must I become? a fool? grant me a happy crazyness and I sign up for it, good even ( as cioran said )

 

[Sub8Hate]

I stopped crying years ago, I went to a point of everyday crying plus literally laying down on the floor in darkness

I endured this for MONTHS

It all blew up with my 2nd attempt

but even after all this, depression is around the corner: if I stop the drugs I am fucked for sure

it's my real life experience that must improve or what the fuck must I become? a fool? grant me a happy crazyness and I sign up for it, good even ( as cioran said )

I hear ya, I cry randomly and can't control it at times. My depression is always there, too. Weed can actually make it worse for me, but my body usually adjusts and it's OK. It's just that I've been taking massive bong rips before work for a couple of months now. It's definitely adding to it, but I won't quit. I like it to much. I've done it in the past to lose weight and sort my shit out, but I'm losing weight now, anyway. I really don't want to give it up. I'd take false happiness, too, as long as I genuinely felt happy. I don't even know what that means, submitting to everything and making the best of it? Maybe I'd find it by being loved by a beautiful foid? I don't know, there will be no resolution, no happy ending. Bleh.

 

[nausea]

I cry randomly and can't control it at times

do you have any sense of guilt associated?

 

[Sub8Hate]

do you have any sense of guilt associated?

Guilt is part of my illness, yes. I feel guilty for being so weak, for being less than a man. 

I'll also feel guilty for things I've done in the past.

 

[Deleted member 2119]

My depression is at rock bottom since 4-5 months

 

[nausea]

I'll also feel guilty for things I've done in the past.

that's my guilt

 

[ItheIthe]

Nope

 

[Sub8Hate]

My depression is at rock bottom since 4-5 months

My condolences. 

Imagine being one of those happy go lucky types... It's insane, I can't even fathom it. Chad and Stacy must be happy most of the time. It must be great to be beautiful. I remain ugly and disposable. I'm one of the ugliest on this site.

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Nope

Got anything? Maybe anxiety?

 

[ItheIthe]

My condolences. 

Imagine being one of those happy go lucky types... It's insane, I can't even fathom it. Chad and Stacy must be happy most of the time. It must be great to be beautiful. I remain ugly and disposable. I'm one of the ugliest on this site.

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Got anything? Maybe anxiety?

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Ever since I started focusing more on God I don't feel these things. Everything in this life is petty and short.

 

[Deleted member 2119]

My condolences. 

Imagine being one of those happy go lucky types... It's insane, I can't even fathom it. Chad and Stacy must be happy most of the time. It must be great to be beautiful. I remain ugly and disposable. I'm one of the ugliest on this site.

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Got anything? Maybe anxiety?

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Yeah I can barely remember how it feels to like myself and be happy. Looking at pictures from my younger self makes me so sad because I know that I felt that way during the early stages of my life. Everything got significantly worse in 2015

 

[nausea]

Ever since I started focusing more on God I don't feel these things

but you got angry recently eh

 

[Sub8Hate]

Ever since I started focusing more on God I don't feel these things. Everything in this life is petty and short.

I wish I had this cope, and if the divine exists, it is far more complex than the yaweh / yeshua model.

 

[nausea]

I wish I had this cope

it's not correct to call it cope imo

 

[Sub8Hate]

My condolences.
Imagine being one of those happy go lucky types... It's insane, I can't even fathom it. Chad and Stacy must be happy most of the time. It must be great to be beautiful. I remain ugly and disposable. I'm one of the ugliest on this site.

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Got anything? Maybe anxiety?

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Yeah I can barely remember how it feels to like myself and be happy. Looking at pictures from my younger self makes me so sad because I know that I felt that way during the early stages of my life. Everything got significantly worse in 2015

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YUP that fucks with me, too. I remember being 10, clear mind, felt good and normal.

 

[ItheIthe]

I wish I had this cope, and if the divine exists, it is far more complex than the yaweh / yeshua model.

No it's not. The prophecies in the Bible came true. You can study them, too. Read Isaiah 53. That was written before Jesus/Yeshua came to be.

The peace I find in Christ is true and real.

EDIT: I meant Isaiah 53


@nausea yes when I get mad at the world, not at myself or any individual. This world is garbage.

 

[Sub8Hate]

it's not correct to call it cope imo

Why not? It's most likely not true. What of the Gods before him? They just don't count, they're just silly? See where I'm going with this?

 

[nausea]

it's not correct to call it cope imo

Why not? It's most likely not true. What of the Gods before him? They just don't count, they're just silly? See where I'm going with this?

the more you go back in time the more you realize it's no cope at all, now tell me where you are going with this

 

[Deleted member 2119]

YUP that fucks with me, too. I remember being 10, clear mind, felt good and normal.

I always fantasize about going back in time and erasing my past mistakes.I wonder how my life would have turned out

My constitutional delay of growth and puberty and some chronic conditions pretty much destroyed my life

 

[nausea]

yes when I get mad at the world, not at myself or any individual. This world is garbage.

eh, not a superfluous issue

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I always fantasize about going back in time and erasing my past mistakes.I wonder how my life would have turned out

eh

 

[Deleted member 2119]

eh, not a superfluous issue

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eh

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Controlling time would be the first superpower that I wish for if I could have one

 

[Sub8Hate]

the more you go back in time the more you realize it's no cope at all, now tell me where you are going with this

Christians will claim their God to be the true God and dismiss all others. We view the old gods as mythology. Christianity is also mythology, it's just that many practice it now and it is seen as a possibly legitimate belief, or definetly legitimate if you're a follower of christ. So essentially I'm saying that they discredit other gods right off the bat, but others have believed in them such as they have believed in christ. Being seeded by aliens is a million times more plausible than the creation story.

 

[nausea]

eh, not a superfluous issue

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eh

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Controlling time would be the first superpower that I wish for if I could have one

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it would not solve my inceldom BUT

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We view the old gods as mythology

you shall digit "Jung interview" on youtube or join my thread about this

myths are integral part of the psyche, just check the cave of forgotten dreams on some streaming site or watch it on youtube my main man

or better yet, join my other threads about this stuff around, plenty of them

and best is this: start looking for this thing yourself, plenty of material online

the creation story.

man, evolution is already scientifically proven, check the religion thread on offtopic, I subscribed to it

BUT ANYWAY, what about the thing that made you calmer? when I get triggered my rage is not calmed by anything, I need time to recover

 

[Sub8Hate]

it would not solve my inceldom BUT

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you shall digit "Jung interview" on youtube or join my thread about this

myths are integral part of the psyche, just check the cave of forgotten dreams on some streaming site or watch it on youtube my main man

or better yet, join my other threads about this stuff around, plenty of them

and best is this: start looking for this thing yourself, plenty of material online

man, evolution is already scientifically proven, check the religion thread on offtopic, I subscribed to it

BUT ANYWAY, what about the thing that made you calmer? when I get triggered my rage is not calmed by anything, I need time to recover

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Likewise for me, it just has to pass. Although I have come up with a blue pilled coping strategy... I tell myself that I have a lot to live for (family and wealth, etc) and that I'll get something eventually. I try to not give into or exacerbate the negative thoughts. I'm on meds, so it's easier now. Off the meds I'll punch holes and destroy things, burn myself, all kinds of fucked up shit. No self harming now, though.

 

[nausea]

Off the meds I'll punch holes and destroy things, burn myself, all kinds of fucked up shit.

off the meds I just agonize and then collapse

 

[Sub8Hate]

off the meds I just agonize and then collapse

For real, from what you posted it sounds like you actually lay down and rot, literally. I've had the feeling, but have never gone catatonic.

 

[nausea]

off the meds I just agonize and then collapse

For real, from what you posted it sounds like you actually lay down and rot, literally. I've had the feeling, but have never gone catatonic.

eh, catatonic state is something else eh, I got it once, if you ask me it was like having your brain turned off ( good thing ) but it lasted only a couple of days, wish I just got it instantly to avoid all the agony

BUT

got good news

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it sounds like you actually lay down and rot

literally

 

[Indari]

yes. i want and getting more so every day

 

[Juxtaposition6]

Anyone else in the same boat?

I've been hardcore depressed for the last couple of weeks. Just now I had to tell myself not to cry like a little bitch, as I just got that feeling, hard. 

I should probably get more sleep and stop waking and baking.

It's okay to cry when you're alone, just not loudly.

 

[idkwattodowithlife]

You gotta find ways to keep your mind busy (just as a means to distract yourself or perhaps lose yourself a bit), yes at times it'd be hard. But life sure isn't 100% guaranteed with happiness.

 

[nausea]

You gotta find ways to keep your mind busy (just as a means to distract yourself or perhaps lose yourself a bit), yes at times it'd be hard. But life sure isn't 100% guaranteed with happiness.

quit the ketamine

 

[Juxtaposition6]

You gotta find ways to keep your mind busy (just as a means to distract yourself or perhaps lose yourself a bit), yes at times it'd be hard. But life sure isn't 100% guaranteed with happiness.

My little finger tells me it oughtta be 100% guaranteed happiness of it's bad.

 

[Shigeru Miyamoto]

honestly if you feel like crying then do so, you'll feel relaxed afterwards
cry in secret tho obviously

 

[Sub8Hate]

Yeah I cry in private, but only if I can't help it. Would never do it in public. If I get a depression attack in a public place I'll go cry in a bathroom, LOL. It's rare, though.

 

[microDongCityUSA]

Yeah I cry in private, but only if I can't help it. Would never do it in public. If I get a depression attack in a public place I'll go cry in a bathroom, LOL. It's rare, though.

how often do you fap/ejaculate?  Testosterone for men deals with mood/energy and studies have shown if you go a week without fapping T levels go higher

I know if i fap too much, my brain feels all over the place and i feel very weak and just want to sleep and generally more emotional, i also have a conspiracy theory that the reason we're seeing men turn more effeminate is easy access to porn and people jacking off more

Made a post about it here - https://incels.is/Thread-NoFap-science-Nietzsche-MMA-Chads-doing-NoFap-before-fighting

 

[Sub8Hate]

how often do you fap/ejaculate?  Testosterone for men deals with mood/energy and studies have shown if you go a week without fapping T levels go higher

I know if i fap too much, my brain feels all over the place and i feel very weak and just want to sleep and generally more emotional, i also have a conspiracy theory that the reason we're seeing men turn more effeminate is easy access to porn and people jacking off more

Made a post about it here - https://incels.is/Thread-NoFap-science-Nietzsche-MMA-Chads-doing-NoFap-before-fighting

Way too much. Once or twice a day for over 20 years. Never even considered stopping. RIP penis.

 

[microDongCityUSA]

how often do you fap/ejaculate? Testosterone for men deals with mood/energy and studies have shown if you go a week without fapping T levels go higher
I know if i fap too much, my brain feels all over the place and i feel very weak and just want to sleep and generally more emotional, i also have a conspiracy theory that the reason we're seeing men turn more effeminate is easy access to porn and people jacking off more

Made a post about it here - https://incels.is/Thread-NoFap-science-Nietzsche-MMA-Chads-doing-NoFap-before-fighting

Way too much. Once or twice a day for over 20 years. Never even considered stopping. RIP penis.

its not when youve been doing it so often, try to see how you feel after a few days of not doing it and try to go for 7 days eventually, i think i have more energy around 1 week and mood is much better but i also want to fap again much more in that time to.......i notice also the older i'm getting the more i do it, the more tired i get and it takes longer to recover from it

 

[Sub8Hate]

its not when youve been doing it so often, try to see how you feel after a few days of not doing it and try to go for 7 days eventually, i think i have more energy around 1 week and mood is much better but i also want to fap again much more in that time to.......i notice also the older i'm getting the more i do it, the more tired i get and it takes longer to recover from it

Do you know other ways of boosting T besides steroids? I may try no fap but I love porn.

 

[nausea]

Rotting since '99

elab?

 

[microDongCityUSA]

its not when youve been doing it so often, try to see how you feel after a few days of not doing it and try to go for 7 days eventually, i think i have more energy around 1 week and mood is much better but i also want to fap again much more in that time to.......i notice also the older i'm getting the more i do it, the more tired i get and it takes longer to recover from it

Do you know other ways of boosting T besides steroids? I may try no fap but I love porn.

If you go to the doctor they have tests to check low t levels and they give you Legal steroids Testosterone replacement therapy

 

[Sub8Hate]

elab?

Received my first official diagnosis and when I first became sexually frustrated / recognized my sub-humanity.

 

[nausea]

If you go to the doctor they have tests to check low t levels and they give you Legal steroids Testosterone replacement therapy

maybe in uganda ruled by idi amin

 

[Sub8Hate]

If you go to the doctor they have tests to check low t levels and they give you Legal steroids Testosterone replacement therapy

Oh, of course. I'm starting to lift so I guess that increases T, too. I might wait because I'm going to be juicin' once I get to the right weight to lift heavy.

 

[nausea]

Oh, of course.

high?

 

[Sub8Hate]

high?

Yea, I just finished a joint. What you got, hash over there in ita? Voglio fumare amico.

 

[nausea]

Voglio fumare amico.

pure io=me too

 

[ICanOnlyFapToBDSM]

I've been "super duper depressed" for about 10 years