SuicideFuel pillow

[berserkerz]

Am I the only one like this? I constantly catch myself thinking that for a long time, hugging my pillow, I imagine it's a lovely girl who doesn't care about how I look. Only two things stop me before I simply die hugging her: the fact that I'm not alone, and sometimes people come into my room just to tell me how pathetic I am. And the fact that I need to go to work, or else I'll end up sleeping on the street. I wish, at least with this pillow, with this thought, albeit falsely, to be happy, to feel like I'm truly happy. And indeed, I feel some quite pleasant feelings for my life inside when I live and hug her as if I'm really not pathetic.

 

[latinocelhispanicel]

Am I the only one like this? I constantly catch myself thinking that for a long time, hugging my pillow, I imagine it's a lovely girl who doesn't care about how I look. Only two things stop me before I simply die hugging her: the fact that I'm not alone, and sometimes people come into my room just to tell me how pathetic I am. And the fact that I need to go to work, or else I'll end up sleeping on the street. I wish, at least with this pillow, with this thought, albeit falsely, to be happy, to feel like I'm truly happy. And indeed, I feel some quite pleasant feelings for my life inside when I live and hug her as if I'm really not pathetic.

my doctor has legit told me "or else you'll end up on the street talking to himself"
but i also hug my pillow... it's even worse for me because it talk to myself (autistic, inb4 "maladaptive daydreamers", it's called scripting for autisticCels) so people wil literally catch me talking in my house... I havent' been in public in so long so I forgot how to discern the public from my house and act like i'm in my house so much to the point where I think i can be low inhib anywhere. Last time i was walking to my next period and I was called weird for talking in the air to a girl

 

[berserkerz]

my doctor has legit told me "or else you'll end up on the street talking to himself"
but i also hug my pillow... it's even worse for me because it talk to myself (autistic, inb4 "maladaptive daydreamers", it's called scripting for autisticCels) so people wil literally catch me talking in my house... I havent' been in public in so long so I forgot how to discern the public from my house and act like i'm in my house so much to the point where I think i can be low inhib anywhere. Last time i was walking to my next period and I was called weird for talking in the air to a girl

real life limits me from fantasies, I wouldn’t want to be in a mental hospital eating pills like garbage, when I come out of there I will no longer be just a pathetic dwarf-freak, but also stupid, and probably so stupid that I will tell everyone that you just need to be confident

 

[latinocelhispanicel]

real life limits me from fantasies, I wouldn’t want to be in a mental hospital eating pills like garbage, when I come out of there I will no longer be just a pathetic dwarf-freak, but also stupid, and probably so stupid that I will tell everyone that you just need to be confident

definitely stay away from jewPills. I almost got olanzapiden my some erratic doctor who totally lost his shit (then slapped a fake bipolar diagnosis on me), I've taken two meds and they completely wrecked my brain.

 

[Efiliste]

It's just a projection of your internal fantasies onto to the world around you. It's normal and perfectly fine, it's just more commonly seen when kids play with toys. You're regressing back to a state of doing such because you're loneliness makes you feel vulnerable, and the pillow, that your mind uses as an pacifying object, is like a 'mother' to you who will 'love' you unconditionally and 'comfort' you no matter what. You've projected the traits of a 'perfect' mother onto this object to idealize it soothe yourself even more.

 

[AngryUbermensch]

Am I the only one like this? I constantly catch myself thinking that for a long time, hugging my pillow, I imagine it's a lovely girl who doesn't care about how I look. Only two things stop me before I simply die hugging her: the fact that I'm not alone, and sometimes people come into my room just to tell me how pathetic I am. And the fact that I need to go to work, or else I'll end up sleeping on the street. I wish, at least with this pillow, with this thought, albeit falsely, to be happy, to feel like I'm truly happy. And indeed, I feel some quite pleasant feelings for my life inside when I live and hug her as if I'm really not pathetic.

I dont this because my brain understands that the pillow is not a foid.

 

[berserkerz]

It's just a projection of your internal fantasies onto to the world around you. It's normal and perfectly fine, it's just more commonly seen when kids play with toys. You're regressing back to a state of doing such because you're loneliness makes you feel vulnerable, and the pillow, that your mind uses as an pacifying object, is like a 'mother' to you who will 'love' you unconditionally and 'comfort' you no matter what. You've projected the traits of a 'perfect' mother onto this object to idealize it soothe yourself even more.

I don’t even know what’s more offensive, that there are people who receive such real love, or that there are people with schizophrenia who don’t understand where reality is, everything is fine with them, you’re not afraid that the girl will cheat on you, laugh at you, you’re not afraid of anything , imagine anyone, it seems to me that schizophrenics have a better life even than Chads

 

[berserkerz]

I dont this because my brain understands that the pillow is not a foid.

mine too, that's the problem

 

[Efiliste]

I don’t even know what’s more offensive, that there are people who receive such real love, or that there are people with schizophrenia who don’t understand where reality is, everything is fine with them, you’re not afraid that the girl will cheat on you, laugh at you, you’re not afraid of anything , imagine anyone, it seems to me that schizophrenics have a better life even than Chads

Delusions are bliss. There's a theory of depressive realism, depressed people may have a more accurate view of reality than average people.

 

[berserkerz]

Delusions are bliss. There's a theory of depressive realism, depressed people may have a more accurate view of reality than average people.

imagine the carefree life of a schizophrenic, he can imagine whatever he wants, and this is also called a disease, probably because he does not work for the government, but simply gets happiness, that’s the point

 

[Efiliste]

imagine the carefree life of a schizophrenic, he can imagine whatever he wants, and this is also called a disease, probably because he does not work for the government, but simply gets happiness, that’s the point

Illusion is powerful